Rex = Beng Car?

Alot of us are guilty of hearing the mmmm psssttt and we'll just think another WRX has sprinted past. Most often than not, their ostentatious blow off valve is almost unmistakable. And we're also guilty to think that it's a "beng" car, myself included. But before you rex drivers start to blast my site, I do not think that Ah Beng drives that car but the car portrays a "beng" image. Guilty as charged?

Different cars portray different images. We often link Merc to towkays, BMWs to snob, Toyota to practicality, so on. For myself, I love my Bimmers. Some people may call me a snob. let me give you a background. I wasn't born with a silver spoon and my parents don't lavish me with expensive toys simply because they can't afford to. That does not stop me from growing to have a liking for certain material wants. There are typical girls out there who carries a couple of different Louis Vuitton bags whenever there's a new season in town. I would spend a large part of my income on my car because this is exactly what I like. That does not make me a snob. i do not look down on other cars. "Orange" drives a QQ and I think it's a great car for her, serves the very purpose she bought the car for. Everyone has different needs and priorities in life and mine happen to be warped in the minds of many of you. For me, i know I'm very clear of what I want and I work towards my goal. I don't stay back till 11pm in the office for no reason. I will not be earning big bucks just by staying in the office, working zombie hours but I know if I work hard enough, one fine day, it will be my turn behind the wheels and in particular, the rear wheel drive one.

Over the past months, I've slogged and finally, I'm seeing some results and my German ponies are glimmering slowly but strongly with hope. Please know I have earned it myself so before you judge, just think, we all love and go crazy over different things.

Back to my point, I did not and would not look down on anyone driving a rex. It's a value for money per bhp car. I don't mind driving it but really, the scooby is just not my cup of tea. First and foremost, only a RWD will convince me at this point in time. Secondly, it's the image it portrays and it's definitely not the kind of repuation I'd want to be associated with. There is nothing wrong with the image but it is just not me. We all have various considerations. Almost everone I met told me that the MINI Cooper S suits me better but based on my purposes, I have decided to shelve that.

Having said all of the above when my eyes are closing, I hope I don't wake up tomorrow and regret what I've said/typed. I still maintain the rex is a beng looking car but there is absolutely nothing wrong 2ith that comment. Not all Rex drivers are beng just like not all Merc drivers are towkays. Besides, I will continue to go "black car and gold rims?? beng leh...". I maintain to talk whatever rubbish I want on my blog... Wooooo...

The Cure of Wakeboarding Withdrawal - More Wakeboarding!

You have heard and seen me whine about my withdrawal syndrome. Guess who I met during my Wednesday Balaclava night?

My wakeboard instructor!

I am going to squeeze in some water time with him this weekend's evening (after all the activities...) since he wants to ride as well. So I'll be riding with the pros and that's free show for you. These guys are good enough for world class wakeboard DVDs and I'll be catching them LIVE. What an exciting thought. I swear I sounded like a broken record when I told "Power Ranger Daddy (the wakeboard instructor)" several times that I really wanna ride and I'm suffering from very severe wakeboarding withdrawal syndrome. Finally, we managed to arrange some slots on Saturday and probably Sunday too. I can't wait!!!

There seem to be an evil flu bug around. Everyone's under the weather even all the way to Sydney and London, almost everyone's been telling me that they are sick. For once, I feel stronger than everyone else but funnily, I was sneezing the whole afternoon yesterday. The sneezing wasn't funny but it was the timing. Whenever the lightning strikes, my nose will start to twitch and whenever the thunder roared, I had to let out a huge sneeze at the same time. Since then, I've been sniffly but still going strong. Trying very hard to top my fluids, (whiskeys included) and during lunch later, I'm going to grab some vitamins to keep this disgusting bug at bay. The sunshine today has worked miraculously for me and finger crossed, I'll stay healthy and be riding like a water baby this weekend.

Get well soon! - Obviously not a message for myself...

My Christmas Wishlist... As all of you will know, this will not be the end of my list haha... But right now, I really only want this.

Introducing... Liquid Force 2008 Jett 132

Severe Wakeboarding Withdrawal Syndrome

My wakeboarding withdrawal syndrome is getting really bad and highly unmanageable. My last session was nearly 2 weeks ago and as many of you have already found out from my constant whining, I didn't manage to ride last week. My board is sitting nicely in the living room in its edge protector. My bags are all packed and I'm just ready to go anytime. But unfortunately, this Saturday I'll have to go help out with some children's concert for a group of autistic children and on Sunday, we're going to have the BMW-sg morning drive. Seems like burnt but I'm hoping to be able to squeeze in something on late Sunday afternoon after the morning drive.

SGRgals

The group of people who are taking up the bulk of my time now. I'm enjoying every minute with them. Life has just become alot more meaningful. Can be very tiring too...

WB Withdrawal

The wakeboarding "infection" has got me so bad, I actually felt very empty when I miss my ride over the last weekend. Totally passed out, I couldn't even hear the alarm on Monday morning and being on MSN till 6am didn't quite help things. I'm so tempted to take annual leave to go wakeboarding this week but at the same time, I wanna bill as much as I can before I take my long break at the end of the year so gotta stay in and work my arse off.

For the past weeks, I've been telling myself to get home earlier so that I can tuck myself in before midnight and never was there a day that I could actually have more than 8 hours of sleep. An activities filled weekend didn't help at all. Don't think I'll be sleeping early tonight either since I'm still working right now. But all these hard work will pay off when I finally get to polish my little ponies come first quarter next year.

Been sniffling the entire day and my nose had been itching since noon. I felt like I'm part of Bewitched's cast. I think someone must be talking about me behind my back. Or does that make your ears itch instead? Or eyes twitch? Gotta get my arse off this chair and get them to the gym so it doesn't stay this big. I need to ride some wakes!!!

SILRA Home Needs Your Help

Pictures of volunteering at SILRA Home will be up soon.

People are often mistaken that leprosy is highly contagious and this is not true. Today, we have very effective drugs to treat this disease and we should not let the fear of contracting the disease stop us from befriending these lonely aged people. Happiness and smiles are contagious so please play your part to contribute to the society and show these people some love and concern. If time is not on your side, try to help them if your financials allow. Since 2003 after they moved to their current premise over at Buangkok Green, overheads are way higher. Any contributions would be welcomed.

We managed to collect enough money to offer them a wonderful catered spread and also took them out for a walk. We take it for granted that we can just open the door and walk out but these old people have to wait for volunteers to come during the weekends to bring them out for their weekly walk. On a personal note, I enjoyed myself tremendously and would do so again if time permits.

I just came back from "Story-telling Meister's" baby girl's full month party. We were really uncreative and all of us ended up buying him vouchers but having said that, it's probably the most practical choice. All the diaper shopping is probably going to strip this man's bank account in no time. Like any new parent, you could almost tell the joy from looking at his silhouette. And as a friend, I genuinely feel happy for him.

Attituder and myself have been sitting here next to each other msn-ing each other. When two girls are absolutely bored, they start to do stupid things and we're perfect examples. Heading out for not so early, fattening supper soon. Girls...

Amazing Race

The "Amazing Race" that I had when I was on a training trip to Hong Kong last year was so much fun. I remembered when I saw the ad on AXN calling for local participants, I wanted to join with Jem. We didn't but I knew if we did, we are just going to have so much fun.

Met "No.1 Female Alkie" and her queer friends last night after a super huge dinner with Como. Two of her friends, or friends' friends (wasn't too sure) were participants of the Amazing Race Asia, Adrian & Collin. Adrian has a hearing disability so he relies on lip-reading to understanding people. Collin, his Amazing race partner communicates with him using sign language and I bet, they used that to their advantage to the fullest. They couldn't reveal who won the competition as they are under a confidential agreement and if they did, they would have to pay millions.

You can catch them every Thursday on AXN, 9pm. Show your support for fellow Singaporeans and such unique combination. Did I mention that Adrian is a really sweet chap?

Tucked myself in the Shanghai Hairy Crab last night and got reminded of how much I actually misses Shanghai. The quality of the crab here is nothing compared to Shanghai and I must make it a point to go there again and this time, I'll bring my parents along. Nonetheless, it's still yum. I'm in danger of my cholesterol shooting off the roof right now.

Got psycho-ed by Como to get the X3 instead of the E90. Good idea, suits me but off my budget. It's the sort of car you wouldn't find yourself modding much since it's a freakin' SUV. I'll stick to my little unambitious 320. Saw a white one, a little overpriced but beautiful. If there's a similar one in January, I wouldn't hesitate.

Things at work have slowed down for me. Some things are looking good on the surface but I can sense quite a bit of undercurrents sweeping me down so I'm trying not to think about it and keep rolling on. Fingers and toes all crossed!

Bala... Krishnan?

Balaclava at 7.30pm for those of you alkies out there. Some pictures from the night before Deepavali and as you can see, I wasn't in my formal corporate look.

Breyton's Urban Legend Wifey


Breyton almost got strangled


Rod Selling Mocca House

Charcoalx


How I Got Drunk...

CharmmyKitte

Como

The Threesome

"My Kitchen Is Over There!"

Finally Normal

Gone With The Commuters

We're all blind to inconsiderate commuters because it has become a common sight in Singapore. I hope these are the last few months that I'll be reliant on the stupid buses and trains. To be perfectly honest, I think we have a great public transport network and system. There's nothing with the infrastructure at all. It's the people and in particular, fellow Singaporeans who are really disappointing.

People still don't give way to the rushing crowd in the morning. It's a luxury to get an unblocked and moving right lane on the escalator at the train station. Just keep left when you don't need to rush off, and that can save some other chap his job or even someone's life. On good days, I breeze through the crowd but you only need ONE person to block up the escalator and that actually creates the chain effect. No one can move after this one brainless fucking idiot. Others stop short of 3 steps from the end and when one person does so, you have a line of rushing bankers and lawyers screeching on their BBK. What the hell!

Getting in and out of the train is still a fucking pain in the neck. People refuse to move to the centre of the train and you see people jammed up at the entrance. I don't have that problem since I always have a seat (benefit of staying near the end of the line) but you'll fume just by watching them. ROAR! For more than twice in the past week, I could hear this Filipino voice through the thumping music blasting from my nano, begging the people to move to the centre of the train.

Exiting the train is worse! People rush into the train like they were afraid that if they were a second slower, the door is either going to squash them or the train might leave without them and not coming in the next 20 long hours. Makes me wanna scream... "Let me out" in the 162 types of dialects that might not even exist.

The least infuriating of these frustrations got to be the leaning man of MRT. These people strategically place themselves leaning against the pole so much so that if they put any more weight, the pole is just gonna bend. As the trains screech itself to a halt, forcing us to bang onto the smelly arse in front. All of you may have thought that all you could do to save yourself from this embarrassment is to hold on tight but because these blob of fats is leaning on the strained pole, within the split second, you can really can't grab anyway and in seemingly slow motion, crashing onto the next Ah Peh's fragile set of bones (BTW, no one seem to offer these poor seniors any seats). Don't flame me, I did gave my my seat on countless occasions, as long as I see someone who needs my assistance and in this case, my seat.

So stop complaining about your ERP unless you think paying for your transport and still suffer the stuffy cabin with malfunctioning A/C filled with people with terrible body odour is a better option.

Tomorrow shall be a cab day...

Hey Mom
Why didn't you tell me
Why didn't you teach me a thing or two
You just let me go
Out into the World
You never thought to share what you knew

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again

Hey Mom
Why didn't you warn me
Coz about boys is something i should have known
They`re like chocolate cake
Like cigarettes
I know they're bad for me
But I just can't leave 'em alone

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again

I wanna do it again
Oh, felt so good

Hey Mom
Since we're talking
What was it like when you were young
Has the world changed
Or is it still the same
A man can kill and still be the sweetest thing.

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good

So I walked under a bus
I got hit by a train
Keep falling in love
Which is kinda the same
I've sunk out at sea
Crashed my car, gone insane
And it felt so good
I want to do it again
I want to do it again

Not Just Running

If you're a little more observant, you would have noticed the new ad on your right. It's an ad on the Nike Charity Run. There's no date or physical run but you've got to have one of the Nike Sport Kit or visit the official site by clicking on the logo. If you do not have one of those kits, do not fret. Email giveback@nuffnang.com. They have 20 Nike plus sports kits to give away! Tell them how far your plan to run, in an innovative manner and we will send one on to you! For every 1KM run, Nike will donate $5 worth of products to underprivileged children through the make-a-wish foundation. I know it's a tad troublesome right? I would love to run but I don't think I'll run out there and buy a kit. I also doubt I'd come up with something creative enough to win the kit but hey, if you really want this, I think they genuine have these stuffs to give it away, so do go for it! Oh but please check if your shoes are one of those Nike+ shoes with the little hole for the sensor, otherwise, you'll find yourself buying new Nike shoes, new kit and new iPod nano. Gotta check my running shoes...

But my zero point two cents to Nike, maybe do a real tie up to sell the 3 items at unbelievable good prices. Maybe I'll consider buying the shoes and Nano at the same time... Maybe should ask if Nuff-Nangers have any discounts... Hmmm... *scheming look across my Monday face.

This reminds me of the Sony Blu-Ray disc. You need to have the other products just so you can use the others. Headed for doom... Speaking of Sony, they have really been disappointing. I think I qualify as a Sony fan. I have a Vaio lappy, the T10 cammie, swears by Sony Ericsson phones but really, if you ask me now, I'd get an Apple lappy, a Canon cammie instead. The picture quality of the T10 have been disappointing. The only saving grace is that it has really quick shutter speed so you take is what you saw. Just the quality being compromised when lighting isn't in its best. The lappy... Sigh... Let's just say, it's awfully painful to be still paying for the installments.

If you really wise to help some poor souls without spending money nor leaving the house, here's a way for you to help. Play now...

Men - O - Pause

I know I haven't been blogging like I used to, going on and on about everything and nothing. Recently, I've been taking a bit of a break from blogging because there's just so much going through my head and work, I'm on the verge of breaking down.

Things on the outside may seem ok and I'm still wakeboarding on the usual weekends except for this one. I took Friday off because I didn't feel like I was able to get myself to work. Physically and mentally, I was weak and exhausted. Sometimes I just wish for a shoulder to cry on but it's not fair to look for a shoulder when you only need a shoulder so I could make do with my trusty comforter. You wouldn't even believe that I was even less than active on Facebook.

The way some people handle things may put me off but I have to emphasize that I'm not unhappy with those people but some things could have been handled in a better way. But of course, in some specific situations, it is undoubtly the person. End of the day, I'm just glad that someone kinda stood up and believed in me and in the coming week, I only want to prove that I can do something to make this already amazing quarter into an unbelieveable one. Things can only be better...

If only life has a pause button...

What Car Would You Be?

I'm a Porsche 911!

You have a classic style, but you're up-to-date with the latest technology. You're ambitious, competitive, and you love to win. Performance, precision, and prestige - you're one of the elite,and you know it.

Take the Which Sports Car Are You? quiz.

Whacked Left Right Centre

Some of you may have caught this video from several other places. Thought it's about time to put in my 2 cents worth which is very different from what most of you might think but to avoid getting murdered by some lunatic at this stage, I shall not blog about it yet.

Well, these are all but excuses. The main reason being I haven't been in the best of shape, physically and mentally to write anything. Life sucks at this juncture for me... I just need someone to tell me that everything will be fine...

My Little Germ

This song by Lily Allen reminds me of my baby brother. We've been fighting ever since my memory started serving me and when I say fight, I mean we get physical with the fists and punches. Growing up with bruises and broken tooth comes as no surprise to me. Now that we're all grown up, we're still closer than most siblings. I've always felt bad that he's been growing up in my shadow and that wasn't fair to him... Not that I'm fab though.

It's quite upsetting to see that he's still not getting anywhere but I really wanna help him as much as I can. It's not easy growing up in our family so nothing can change the fact that he's my baby brother and only one at that. Grow up soon and I love you, little rascal!

Oooooooh, oh deary me,
My little brother's in his bedroom smoking weed,
I tell him he should get up 'cause it's nearly half past three
He can't be bothered 'cause he's high on THC.
I ask him very nicely if he'd like a cup of tea,
I can't even see him 'cause his room is so smokey,
Don't understand how one can watch so much TV,
My baby brother Alfie how I wish that you could see.

I only say it cause I care,
So please can you stop pulling my hair?
Now, now there's no need to swear,
please don't despair my dear, mon frere.

Oh Alfie get up it's a brand new day,
I just can't sit back and watch you waste your life away
You need to get a job because the bills need to get paid,
Get off your lazy arse, Alfie please use your brain
Surely there's some walls out there that you can go and spray,

I'm feeling guiltier for leading you astray.
Now how the hell do you ever expect that you'll get laid,
When all you do is stay in playing your computer games?

Oh little brother please refrain from doing that,
I'm trying to help you out, so can you stop being a twat.
It's time that you and I sat down and had a little chat,
And look me in the eyes take off that stupid fitted cap.

I only say it cause I care,
So please can you stop pulling my hair?
Now, now there's no need to swear,
please don't despair

Please don't despair
My Mon frere

I Prefer Drinks Today...

Been snowed under and haven't got time to blog. I'm heading down to Balaclava to wind down... Don't think I'm in the right mindset to blog so might consider doing so when I'm a little tipsy tonight. Join me!

Lunch @ Raffles' Place

Lunch is always a pain in Raffles' Place.

I hate the tissue packs culture and have never done anything of the sort. A joke based on "Mao Meen's" personal experience - His colleagues and him left tissue packs on the table to "chope" the seats while they went to get their lunch. When they return to their seats, he found an "ang moh" couple sitting on their "reserved" seats and were wiping off perspiration with the "free" tissue "provided" on the table. They were obviously tourists.

I can never find people to lunch with me and the reasons are as follows:

- somehow the timing are never good
- very few works in Raffles' Place
- we usually have to rush off
- last minute meetings
- preference to dine in the office where we don't have to squeeze with the crowd
- they are simply not in Raffles' Place

Friends who drop by Raffles' Place once in a while will call me for lunch and I really appreciate the gesture. "Ex-Sir" couldn't make it for lunch today but very pleasantly surprised, Como called around lunch time and asked if I wanted to do lunch. But was coerced into taking another day of annual leave for wakeboarding. Let's see.. Just thankful that I don't have to do a ta bao and have lunch with my computer and stare lovingly into the monitor.

And for the rest of the week, I'm filled with lunch meetings. Lunch is a little less painful this week... Come next week, the pain process starts all over again.

Micro Management

Have anyone of you ever been a victim of micro-management? Ever worked under a boss who's a victim of Stockholm's syndrome, totally in love with the man right on top of us? All I wanna do the entire morning is just to scream, "Get out of my face!". Please see that micromanagement does not solve problems but create bigger and potentially back firing ones. To the people who are bottom dwellers, this is just plain evil and disabling. I need to scream!

Feeling so lazy today, I didn't wanted to wait 5 mins to get the Daktacort and now, I'm itching to death. The queue in the pharmacy was crazy. Welcome to Raffles' Place. Th laziness extends itself to a dangerous level. Just received an email from Comedy Boss that I haven't been making enough phone calls. Now, not one but two micro managing bosses. All the more reluctant to turn up for Family Day this coming Saturday.


Got these today and took me quite a while to figure out who's the sender. Thanks. My Monday was really blue although there's nothing much anyone can do to help, it did take some stress off my mind for a while.

Feel like strangling some idiots today. Think the lack of sleep is getting to me... I should cool down and not do anything rash that I'd regret. Not murdering someone of course..

Jumble Jumble

After a day of lying in bed, I'm now disoriented from an overdose of sleep. Yesterday was a really long day. Started with wakeboarding which I was exhilarated from managing a bigger jump but not quite the two wake jump yet. My instructor did mention that judging from the way I ride, like a rocket shooting in various directions and I don't really ride like a girl or how a girl should be riding, I should be able to attempt that soon. *secretly happy

Celebrated "Balloon Sculptor's" birthday over at Boat Quay's Mind's Cafe. It was a surprise party not exactly well planned. We lit up the candles on the birthday cake like 3 times when his girlfriend first gave one of our buddies a missed call. And he thought we had forgotten about him. Hey buddy, to be very frank, I never could remember birthdays but I'll always be there whenever I'm needed. The place was fun but definitely not the perfect Saturday night choice of destination. The rest of the boys went on to have their regular beers and I adjourned to Velvet to meet up with Como, his friends and our wakeboard instructor who was later bugged the entire night to buy condoms from this girl who was having her hen's night, which really cracked me up until I was pissed that is. We were going from tables to tables selling each condom for S$20. Darn steep but that's where the fun is. Some regular from Velvet who calls himself the last bachelor in Singapore even bought us a bottle of Moet.

Over at Mind's Cafe, we played a couple of games but the best one is still the one they played during chalet in January this year. It's called Jurassic Jumble and it's a trading game. The objective is to get a hand of similar cards. When you do, you can grab a "bone" from the middle of the table and when someone has done so, the rest can get their bone. There will be ONE player without the bone and that's the loser. I can't believe that no one realise that I've taken the bone for like one whole minute until "Ballon Sculptor" played busy body and found out that I've actually gotten the bone.

Now now now... I've got to try to get back to sleep so that I won't be a zombie at work tomorrow.

Personality Test

This personality test is used by alot of the HR department to gauge the candidate's personality and it really works.

1. When do you feel your best?

a. In the morning
b. During the afternoon and early evening
c. Late at night

2. You usually walk

a. Fairly fast, with long steps
b. Fairly fast, with short, quick steps
c. Less fast, head up, looking the world in the face
d. Less fast, head down
e. Very slowly

3. When talking to people you

a. Stand with your arms folded
b. Have your hands clasped
c. Have one or both your hands on your hips
d. Touch or push the person to whom you are talking
e. Play with your ear, touch your chin, or smooth your hair

4. When relaxing, you sit with

a. Your knees bent with your legs neatly side by side
b. Your legs crossed
c. Your legs stretched out or straight
d. One leg curled under you

5. When something really amuses you, you react with

a. A big, appreciative laugh
b. A laugh, but not a loud one
c. A quiet chuckle
d. A sheepish smile

6. When you go to a party or social gathering you

a. Make a loud entrance so everyone notices you
b. Make a quiet entrance, looking around for someone you know
c. Make the quietest entrance, trying to stay unnoticed

7. You're working very hard, concentrating hard, and you're interrupted. Do you..

a. Welcome the break
b. Feel extremely irritated
c. Vary between these two extremes

8. Which of the following colors do you like most?

a. Red or orange
b. Black
c. Yellow or light blue
d. Green
e. Dark blue or purple
f. White
g. Brown or gray

9. When you are in bed at night, in those last few moments before going to sleep, you lie

a. Stretched out on your back
b. Stretched out face down on your stomach
c. On your side, slightly curled
d. With your head on one arm
e. With your head under the covers

10. You often dream that you are

a. Falling
b. Fighting or struggling
c. Searching for something or somebody
d. Flying or floating
e. You usually have dreamless sleep
f. Your dreams are always pleasant


Points:
1. a. 2 b. 4 c. 6
2. a. 6 b. 4 c. 7 d. 2 e. 1
3. a. 4 b. 2 c. 5 d. 7 e. 6
4. a. 4 b. 6 c. 2 d. 1
5. a. 6 b. 4 c. 3 d. 5 e. 2
6. a. 6 b. 4 c. 2
7. a. 6 b. 2 c. 4
8. a. 6 b. 7 c. 5 d. 4 e. 3 f. 2 g. 1
9. a. 7 b. 6 c. 4 d. 2 e. 1
10. a. 4 b. 2 c. 3 d. 5 e. 6 f. 1


Now add up the total number of points.

Over 60 points: Others see you as someone they should "handle with care" You're seen as vain, self-centered, and who is extremely dominant. Others may admire you, wishing they could be more like you, but don't always trust you, hesitating to become too deeply involved with you.

51 to 60 points: Others see you as an exciting, highly volatile, rather impulsive personality; a natural leader, who's quick to make decisions, though not always the right ones. They see you as bold and adventuresome, someone who will try anything once; someone who takes chances and enjoys an adventure. They enjoy being in your company because of the excitement you radiate.

This is me...
41 to 50 points: Others see you as fresh, lively, charming, amusing, practical, and always interesting; someone who's constantly in the center of attention, but sufficiently well-balanced not to let it go to their head. They also see you as kind, considerate, and understanding; someone who'll always cheer them up and help them out.

31 to 40 points: Others see you as sensible, cautious, careful and practical. They see you as clever, gifted, or talented, but modest...Not a person who makes friends too quickly or easily, but someone who's extremely loyal to friends you do make and who expect the same loyalty in return. Those who really get to know you realize it takes a lot to shake your trust in your friends, but equally that it takes you a long time to get over it if that trust is ever broken.

21 to 30 points: Your friends see you as painstaking and fussy. They see you as very cautious, extremely careful, a slow and steady plodder. It would really surprise them if you ever did something impulsively or on the spur of the moment, expecting you to examine everything carefully from every angle and then, usually decide against it. They think this reaction is caused partly by your careful nature.

Under 21 points: People think you are shy, nervous, and indecisive, someone who needs looking after, who always wants someone else to make the decisions and who doesn't want to get involved with anyone or anything. They see you as a worrier who always sees problems that don't exist. Some people think you're boring. Only those who know you well know that you aren't.

Rollin'

Just came back from lunch with Breyton's "Urban Legend Wifey". Family planning was discussed at length among all other girly giggly stuffs. I'm sure there are advantages and disadvantages in planning in advance but we came to the conclusion that it's all useless to plan ahead because our lives will end up revolving around it. And more often than not, things never ever go according to plans so why bother.

Things are definitely looking up and I really have to admit that luck plays a huge part. Take for example, I sent someone out in February this year and since then, nothing has progressed. It could be the turtle speed Bangkok is working on that we're not used to but trust me, it's all luck. The client dropped me an email today and said that they'd like to meet up with this guy and although this fellow is in amidst of finalising a deal with another prospective employer, he was still keen to meet my client. You have no idea how much this took me by surprise and unlike all my other roles, I have zero expectations on this one as any excitement would have been watered down over the months. Must say that I'm very pleasantly surprised. I'm just flying way ahead of everyone in the office and I'm darn pleased. On a roll!!!

Tonight's the CarTimes Dinner thingy and frankly, I'm not superbly keen but will do whatever to help the forum. Volunteering the weary soul, I shall make my way for some scrumptious food.

Take a poll - E90 320i or the Mini Cooper S? Just found out, the MCS can carry a wakeboard. I have no more excuses...

Wanted to put in the MTV of Ridin' by Chamillionaire but the smarty pants managed to disallow embedding so just imagine Snugloft singing along to the song...

Chamillionaire lyrics

Who's Taking Over?

Happy Deepavali and Happy Birthday to my one and only Dai Gah Jhe!!! Time for you to find an eligible guy and get off the alcohol. Er, when are we going for drinks?

This week's been especially nervewrecking for organising the wakeboarding sessions because most people for some reason couldn't make it and I had to find last minute stand-ins. The hunt is making me nervous and upset. I just want to tag along and not be the idiotic organiser again. Como, can i pass the job to you?

Drinks last night did not manage to disable me. However, it did affect my riding today. Despite what some guys may think that alcohol or the leftover of it from the previous night would give you the "balls' to ride it bigger and fiercer, it didn't work that way for me at all. My limbs were soft and I wasn't even able to cross the wake without face planting into the greasy water during my first ride. The second one was slightly better and I managed some jumps. Somehow, the small jumps had failed to excite me because I was unable to get as much air as I initially hoped to. Let's just hope this situation improves by Saturday. I have to and I want to go bigger and yes, I'm being greedy and ambitious but it's a benchmark that I've set myself and I'd want to just be able to do it.

Just came back from watching "Halloween" and it was utterly disappointing. To be fair, I can't quite comment on the show since I was only in there for less than 30 mins. Still feeling queasy from the half-hearted wakeboarding session today, I felt so sick in the stomach and the mindless stabbing, incredibly violent scenes did not help one bit. As much as I'm regretting leaving the cinema and unable to watch it still the end, I knew I had to leave when I did because I also knew I couldn't enjoy the movie while feeling like I need to throw up badly. I would really appreciate it if someone could fill me in on the story line and what happened to Michael Myers eventually.

I feel sick now...

Counting Down...

Almost there... We close officially at 4 today and I'll be rushing home to change before "Breyton" picks me up along with his "Urban Legend Lawyer turned Banker Wifey" who is intending to matchmake me with a litigator tonight. If it means more friends, I don't mind but I don't think I'd wanna date anyone at all at this point in time. I'm happy the way life is but well, more friends always sound good. It's been so long since I last had Pepper Lunch and I'm going to "eat for revenge" tonight.

Just closed another well paid junior one so I'll be laughing my way to the bank next year. Till then, fingers remain crossed and pray hard that nothing goes wrong.

More than half the day was gone with the database still down but all I did today was to get a phone call to tell me the magic word and it made my day. Friday on, I'll have to work even harder on more roles and I'll got nothing more to work on now to make it even bigger. I still have got a month to go before closing and I'm working to get on the next tier. It's all worth the anticipation.

You Are A Lily

You are a nurturer and all around natural therapist. People see you as their rock. And they are able to depend on you. You are a soothing influence. You can make people feel better with a few words. Your caring has more of an impact than even you realize.

What Flower Are You?

And I thought I'm... My name shall remain a secret... it's so bloody lame but what can I do, I'm so bored and I'm counting down to go home.

Feeling Like A Rockstar Minus The Sex & Drugs

Signing off 300 or 500 Christmas cards is making me feel like a rock star but I'm not enjoying it a wee bit. My hands are tired and I just want to kill my boss. All these doesn't quite matter and I'm happily signing it because I've put in the big on and there's mid-size one looking really good. Looking at a good Chinese New Year and a nice car. My fingers and toes are cramping up from keeping it all crossed up but I'm not complaining. On the contrary, life's been good and I'm on a roll. For somebody who's born unlucky like me, I'm eternally grateful.

The database's been down the entire day so we're legally slacking. Finally got my butt off the chair and opened myself the CPF investment account. The financial planner must be cursing and swearing behind my back. It took me like 2 months...

I can't wait for tomorrow to come. The major Balaclava session and getting dead drunk...

Can't Breathe

Fingers still tightly crossed and I can barely breathe. Things are looking good but after the months of turmoil, I'm still holding my breath.

Cars doesn't seem that far away now. There's a 2 year Mini Cooper S Cab for sale and the price seem ok. The only thing being, it's grey with black stripes and blue top plus I'm not a Cab person. Kinda hard to swallow. Excellent condition, or so was told. The main concern now is if that little thing can fit my wakeboard. Not optimistic with the likelihood. It is ringing in my mind, "A Bimmer's A Bimmer!".

The little meetup last night for yet another car club was fun and finally get to meet up with the Sir Ducer, the handheld encyclopedia. Jewell then threw a bomb and told us that we've got a dinner to attend on Friday at Ngee Ann city for some car magazine and out of no where, I was being appointed to be the speaking to the press. I think I prefer a good ol' meal at KFC.

Anyway, my working style...

Your Working Style
You are an ingenious innovator who always see new possibilities and new ways of doing things. You have a lot of imagination and initiative for starting projects and a lot of impulsive energy for carrying them out. You are sure of the worth of your inspirations and tireless with the problems involved. You are stimulated by difficulties and most ingenious in solving them. You enjoy feeling competent in a variety of areas and value this in other as well.
You are extremely perceptive about the attitudes of other people, and can use this knowledge to win support for your projects. You aim to understand rather than to judge people.

Your energy comes from a succession of new interests and your world is full of possible projects. You may be interested in so many different things that you have difficulty focusing. Your thinking can then help you select projects by supplying some analysis and constructive criticism of your inspirations, and thus add depth to the insights supplied by your intuition. Your use of thinking also makes you rather objective in your approach to your current project and to the people in your lives.

You are not likely to stay in any occupation that does not provide many new challenges. With talent, you can be inventor, scientist, journalist, troubleshooter, marketer, promoter, computer analysts, or almost anything that it interests you to be.

A difficulty for you is that you hate uninspired routine and find it remarkably hard to apply yourself to sometimes necessary detail unconnected with any major interest. Worse yet, you may get bored with your own projects as soon as the major problems have been solved or the initial challenge has been met. You need to learn to follow through, but are happiest and most effective in jobs that permit one project after another, with somebody else taking over as soon as the situation is well in hand.

Because you are always being drawn to the exciting challenges of new possibilities, it is essential that you develop your judgment. If your judgment is undeveloped, you may commit yourself to ill-chosen projects, fail to finish anything, and squander your inspirations on incomplete tasks.

Now for the infurating bit...

glumbert - Dolphin massacre in Japan

I cried when I saw this and mentally too tired to comment. Leave your thoughts.

Wind Beneath My Board

Jumps were out of my league when I started wakeboarding, or so I thought. Earlier on, I told myself that I'd want to do a heel-side one wake jump that weekend. By accident, I did. But in subsequent sessions, I can't seem to do anything right so i went back to the basics, slowly carving and surfing the wakes, learning to feel the tension of the line all over again. As for yesterday, I learnt to ride up the wake and did my jump. When I finally felt my board off the surface of the water, I was thinking, I should have succeeded in a jump which I eventually found out that I did after getting on the boat and hearing it from my mates. It felt great. And I wanna pop it bigger and better the next time. I was so tired after that, I was semi-comatosed and went to sleep at about 6pm last night and woke at 8am this morning which also explained why there were no entries yesterday.

Fingers crossed, it seems like the big one is moving and I could be getting my set of wheels next year. One of the forumer's friend is letting go of his MINI Cooper S Cab for a 335i. The price seemed alright and he'll let go around March next year so timing wise, seems just fine for me. We'll see... I still have a brand new GTi at the back of my head. Spending my birthday at Amankila can only be... say plans for my 30th birthday instead. The big 3. Shivers!!!

Due to the big one and possibly a new role to work on, I will not be going for Track Day tomorrow. Instead, I will be staying put to work for my wheels and more importantly, be there for Meiren Biaojie. I hope things are fine for her and that these are all but a false alarm. Everything is gonna be alright. I'll pray...

Pay The Man You Losers!

You have probably seen this and if you haven't, WHERE THE FUCK HAVE YOU BEEN?

Taken off The UK Daily Mail

Brits in Singapore mock aged rickshaw driver and spark anger over YouTube clip

18:55pm on 1st November 2007

Three British tourists who mocked a 76-year-old rickshaw driver because he couldn't pedal fast enough for them - then posted a video of the struggling and panting old man on YouTube - have caused uproar in Singapore.

The trio also ran off without paying the £5 fare he requested and escaped in a taxi yelling expletives which were heard on YouTube as they filmed themselves leaving the scene at Clarke Quay, popular nightspot.

“Ten dollars my fucking arse,” yelled one as the video camera showed a close-up of his face.

The video titled “the Slowest Taxi In SE Asia” was posted on the popular site by one of the three, who called himself Bo Davis.

Angered by the way they treated the rickshaw driver dozens of Singaporean bombarded the website and local papers, expressing their feelings and what they would like to do to them.

“Don't come back to Singapore,” wrote one. “We will be waiting for you.”

Another attacked them for behaving like Singapore was still a British colony. And a local tabloid The New Paper splashed the story on the front page with two pages inside, showing the laughing faces of the mocking Brits goading the rickshaw rider.

The video also showed close-ups of the three Brits and the agonised look on the face of the driver, Mr Lee Shee Lam, as he pedalled as fast as he could under the weight of the three men, all in their mid to late twenties.

They were also heard laughing and mocking him. “God, he's in fifth gear,” said one.

They had squeezed into the rickshaw at Clarke Quay for the ten minute ride along the river.

But soon it was clear they were out to poke fun at Mr Lam along the way.

Among all the "chow ang moh" and "bloody Brits" we have seen splashed all over the internet, have anyone of you realised that the boys have already committed a crime? In the UK, they could be charged for "making off without payment" - S3 Theft Act 1978 which provides for "an obtaining of services where the other is induced to confer a benefit by doing some act, or causing or permitting some act to be done, on the understanding that the benefit has been or will be paid for." In this case, the service is not the trip from point A to B but the entertainment value and that they have moved from one point to another regardless of the distance traveled and the speed that they went by. Don't ask me about the Penal Code because I have no freaking idea.

After the whole saga on some car forum in Singapore, I'm too tired to comment on anything but no matter what nationalities these guys may be and whatever skin colour they are wearing, this behavior is unacceptable and not right. Unlike what most people think, I thought the fun and jeering is not uncommon and we do that unknowingly without considering the consequences and finally, I do not blame them for that. My only fault and the only issue that makes me really upset, would be them not paying for the service that they have already obtained. Seeing the old man riding the bike with all his might pains me but objectively speaking, he has provided a service and should be compensated for. Even if a young man were to be riding that trishaw with no trouble whatsoever, he should too be paid for the service he has provided.

See for yourself and form your own comment. And yes, using "ang moh" is offensive. My Comedy Boss is probably my favourite person in the office. He's a Brit and nothing like those chaps in the clip. Do not make an across the board kinda comment, it's not fair. I don't like being called a chink or FOB when I'm out of Singapore as well. Basic respect for your peers.

Give Me The Money Now !!!

Have I told you how screwed up some accountants are? Particularly those I've got to deal with. I was expecting a cheque sometime this week so that I can go ahead to book my trip up to New York. My dumbass accountant had to go on holiday then medical leave and the best part of that all, did not prepare our cheques before she went on her annual leave. She always screws up my money whenever I needed them most. All I wanna do now is to strangle the guts out of her.

I called up yesterday to check on the availability of flights. If I were to take United, it'd cost me about S$3000 but if I take Cathay, it'd be slightly more than S$2000 but they have only ONE seat left. To top it all, if I want to reserve that, I'd have to pay the whole sum in cash and only cash. So I'm just staring into space and hope that there's a miracle. I have taken a whole block of annual leave at the end of the year, I'd be like an idiot sitting at home wasting the annual leave if I'm not going to New York but that's besides the point! I want to go to New York! I want to get my tattoo done. I need a break. I want a white Christmas!

I can kill someone now!!!

For the past weeks, I've been spending a shitload of time on Facebook and even while at Balaclava last night, "Breyton" and myself were reporting "LIVE" from Balaclava. Experienced first hand last night that alcohol with no dinner was bad and considering lunch was half a bowl of soup, I'm beginning to think that I'm going on an anorexic diet. Don't worry. I'm still as chubby as can be and will continue to grow horizontally although I refuse to. I still love my foods and especially the yummy chicken wings from Simpang Bedok and needless to say, limau ais to go with it.


Went to The Board Shop over at Far East Shopping Centre last night and picked up this handle which is essentially a free gift depending on your perspective. Our friend here typing happen to be a big "carrot/turnip" and overpaid for her wakeboard and bindings set up. Upon realising, she tried to get a deal from buying the floatation vest cheap. The guy called and offered to give me the handle at no cost because he didn't want an unhappy customer. A very decent thing to do, must say. Thing now is, I have the handle but I do not have the rope/line. To buy that line, would mean the bleeding of my pocket of another S$180. Truthfully at this point in time, I'm not prepared to pay S$180 for this.


This is what I put my money in last night. The real deal. This keeps me safe, if not, alive.

Personality Test

Personality Test taken from Meiren Biaojie's Blog.

My results as follows:

Your view on yourself:
You are intelligent, honest and sweet. You are friendly to everybody and don't like conflict. Because you're so cheerful and fun people are naturally attracted to you and like to talk to you.

The type of girlfriend/boyfriend you are looking for:
You are not looking merely for a girl/boyfriend - you are looking for your life partner. Perhaps you should be more open-minded about who you spend time with. The person you are looking for might hide their charm under their exterior.

Your readiness to commit to a relationship:
You prefer to get to know a person very well before deciding whether you will commit to the relationship.

The seriousness of your love:
You like to flirt and behave seductively. The opposite sex finds this very attractive, and that's why you'll always have admirers hanging off your arms. But how serious are you about choosing someone to be in a relationship with?

Your views on education
Education is less important than the real world out there, away from the classroom. Deep inside you want to start working, earning money and living on your own.

The right job for you:
You're a practical person and will choose a secure job with a steady income. Knowing what you like to do is important. Find a regular job doing just that and you'll be set for life.

How do you view success:
You are afraid of failure and scared to have a go at the career you would like to have in case you don't succeed. Don't give up when you haven't yet even started! Be courageous.

What are you most afraid of:
You are afraid of having no one to rely on in times of trouble. You don't ever want to be unable to take care of yourself. Independence is important to you.

Who is your true self:
You are full of energy and confidence. You are unpredictable, with moods changing as quickly as an ocean. You might occasionally be calm and still, but never for long.

Whether if it's true, it isn't that important. But I'm sure it kept me busy for 10 mins trying to complete the test then read the conclusion...

Smell Me.

How many times do you have the deja vu sort of feeling when there's a certain smell in the air?

Do you know our sense of smell is one of the chemical senses apart from our sense of taste?

Children can distinguish between the smell of their siblings and other children of the same age. Babies recognise their own mothers' smell and mothers recognise their own babies' smell. Emotion can be communicated by smell. Dogs and horses are very sensitive to the smell of fear in humans.

Memory and smell are intimately linked. I have walked past our own streets and the smell will actually remind me of Hong Kong or Bangkok or Shanghai. When I do, I'll recall all the times I spent in these cities. It's amazing what smells can do.

Just a trivia - Do you know our sense of smell is disabled when we're asleep which is why we're more likely to die of suffocation if a fire breaks out when we're asleep than to be awaken by the foul burnt smell? So we're all safe from farting partners, until you wake up for pee break that is.

Some scents naturally reminds us of certain people. It could be their natural odour or the combination of their bodily fluids and artificial fragrance. According to Professor Robert Winston, subtle body odours determines our choice of partners which I do not disagree because I am certainly attracted to certain people and a whiff of their smell calms me into a natural ease.

More often than not, we underestimate what our sense of smell can do to us. We actually communicate unknowingly through scents and smells.

By the way, women have been proved to be more sensitive to smell than men. Can you remember my scent?

Up Up And Don't Go Away

Looking at how my Comedy Boss deals with the offers and playing with the different numbers and combinations really impresses me. I can see my inexperience on him and would hope to be a great recruiter like him one day. Things are looking up. Deals that weren't moving remains still but new work are showing results and at this point in time, I can only keep all my fingers absolutely crossed. In this world, I've got to be one of the most unlucky person around but when good times like these come along, you have to admit, things can get really sweet. No matter how bitchy people around you get, you just ignore them and move on. This good luck will have to be with me for a while more in order for me to be looking at a car I want to get early next year.

This weekend, I'm going on a wakeboard frenzy starting from Friday afternoon but I've also declined a ride on Sunday or I'd go absolutely crazy and definitely poor. Too much alcohol, wakeboarding and lack of sleep don't make a very good combination. I can't wait to get my vest...

There's a new addition to the Fat Club if we still consider "Story-telling Meister" as a member. His daughter whom I've no freaking idea what's her name and when's her birthday but was invited to her full month party end of this month.

Back to work and make sure I can afford the body kit...

A Letter to Little La Di Da...

When I was younger, my cousins used to bring me out on dates. Don't ask me why but I do remember some of their partners then till today. Things in the adults world may not always work out but for the few months that I've spent it with all of you, I really enjoyed myself. Like an aunt, I'd want to give you the best the world has to offer and shelter you against the evils. All of you are good kids and will definitely grow up to be fine adults. Hearing stories of your mischievous acts makes me laugh but at the same time, depresses me that I'd not be there to watch you grow up. When I first met you, you can barely talk and couldn't even greet me. The last time I saw you, you were speaking in full sentences and using words that shocked me. Thanks for all the joy you've brought me. If I ever have kids, I can only hope they can be as happy as you...

Somehow, I can still hear you sing, "Doncha..."

Raindrops Keep Falling On My Head

Monthly meetup are common affairs for car groups/forums and has become tagged on my diaries. Today was supposed to be the meetup for 2 different car forums but somehow, closely related. The first forum meetup was at Marina South and we were supposed to do a photoshoot for one of the car magazine in Singapore.

Jewell, our dear forum owner, decided to tell the Veron that she's going to be at Marina South early. So Veron, who was nice enough to pick me up, came 45 minutes earlier than our agreed time. I panicked and left home without makeup or what so ever, bringing along my laptop thinking I'd be going to Kallang later on and I could surf the internet if I ever get bored and considering that I was planning to drop by Meiren Biaojie's place, it would be wise to lug it with me.

We arrived so early, no one else was there. Jewell hadn't even picked her friend and I believed she was still home when I called. One after another, the drivers started to come in. Unfortunately for us, so did the dark cloud. As we were arranging the cars in some weird formation, we began to feel droplets of rain falling on our head. Thunder and lightening started to terrorise us and after a few quick shots, we were running out of the place completely drenched.

Como, Haze and myself decided to indulge ourselves with a little wakeboard equipment shopping instead of proceeding to the second meetup at Kallang. The rain was so heavy and we didn't think it would go on. Well, it did. According to the forum, there was a "huge" turn up of 5-6 cars.

Anyways, saw this vest which I might go back to get it very soon. If you're planning to get me an early Christmas and birthday present, let me know, I'll give you the name of the shop and let the guy know that you're coming to pick up the tab for me. I'm too broke from the overpriced board.

It was good to be able to see the girls today after a while, er say a week? My Meiren Biaojie and my nieces and more than just my family to me. Both mother and daughters are like my sisters and bestfriends. Being with them keeps me sane and smiling. And I have to say, watching a movie in the new car may be fuel consuming but it would have been a great date... The only thing, the only guy in the car was my Dad.

Grumble Grumble

You did not miss a post neither did blogspot screw up. I did not blog yesterday.

At work, I was overwhelmed by a messy offer, another one on standstill and a placement. One to start the quarter and yes, it's a little too late considering I'll be away the whole of December. I'm not performing up to mark and people around me are feeling the pressure to transfer these stresses onto me. I'm really trying my very best but it's not enough. When you have little clients, there's only so much you can do. This week alone, I've drown myself in alcohol in 3 of the nights and I'm not even counting in tonight and possibly, tomorrow.

On a Halloween evening, I shouldn't be sitting here feeling snappy about everything but I can't help it. Everyone seemed to be going somewhere and I'm just home watching bad weekend TV. (I prefer weekday programmes.) I could go out and have a drink waiting to be picked up or something but that's not how I want to lead my life but sitting here feeling all down and lonely is not helping either. Do I hate the loneliness in singlehood or do I just love being loved while in love?

I have never been really picked up by guys. Throughout our lives, undeniably, we'd have been picked up by guys at one point in time or another but they are usually unbelievably irritating and unattractive. By unattractive, I don't mean having a super oily or distorted face but rather, someone who is unable to hold a decent and intelligent conversation with you. More often than not, they can't even speak one language well, be it English or Mandarin. Very disappointing. Last night I was picked up by this English boy. I don't think I'd ever go out with him but I have to say, I felt flattered. I enjoyed the conversation, at least before I got irritated because I wanted to go back to my friends. Como reminded me that I still have some market value. I started to think, is my value that depreciated at this age. Some part of me unwillingly admitted that age is indeed catching up and my shelf life is running out. Even then, I will not let that hinder or rush me into any big decisions in life. I will walk down my journey the pace I enjoy most. Only then, I will have no major regrets.

The hangover this morning coupled with the lack of sleep, just makes it disastrous for wakeboarding. This is the first time I'm trying out at Raffles Marina in Tuas. We were bordering the Malaysian waters. The wind around that place makes it really choppy and really tough for wakeboarding. But if one can wakeboarding in choppy waters, still water is going to come as a piece of cake. However, the pressure the knees have to take to absorb the bumps from the waves worries me. Tonight could be a sleepless night with inflamed knees.

If I type anymore, I would sound disgruntled and potentially be annoying and so to prevent that, I shall go play Texas Hold'Em on Facebook.

Screwed Up

Things haven't been very much different. I'm still being thrown around mentally on a daily basis and had a major screw up yesterday. Now they are just thinking that I'm not doing any work and is making me go crazy. I don't know how much longer I can take this despite the little one I got through today.

Last night, I worked way past the usual time and got myself a quick drink with people from yet another car forum and scooted home really quick. Dragged my tired soul to work today before the rest and now I'm faced with this mess. Total crap!

The only thing that's pushing me one would be the experiences that I'm going to gain and the potential of giving myself the better life. As much as I try really hard to perform to the satisfying mark, I need the right opportunities as well. Life is just not helping me.

Sorry if I don't sound coherent or anywhere near anything you might wanna read or even vaguely legible, my brains are just to exhausted. I need a shoulder...

Still Missing You

Annual leave terms are our favourite part of our employment contract. (If the number is reasonable, that is.) Since I don't really go away much, I have a shitload of leaves accumulated. Technically, I don't have very many days to spare but coupled with weekends and public holidays, I will have a long stretch of leave at the end of the year. So it's been approved and I'll be out of this office for the much needed break from 17th December 2007 and will only return to work on 2nd January 2008. Let's just hope that I can afford to fly to New York.

24 October 2007 - Been a year since my Grandma passed away.

Same time last year, our faces were washed with tears and we were running around trying to get the funeral to run smoothly. Over the past year, so much has happened but there are still times I still feel that she's around. I miss her dearly and to even think that she has really left me, really upsets me. One year may seem like a long time to some but for me, it's not vaguely near sufficient to dilute the grief. Work's been stressful and all but none of those feelings are as tough to cope as to losing a loved one, the most important one. I would give up anything in the world to see her one more time. I want Grandma to know that I have a proper job now and am able to fend for myself. I want her to be proud of me that I can now help my family and my brother through all the rough times that they are going through. I want her to be happy that the bunch of cousins, we're still close and love each other deeply. (Meiren Biaojie, I want you to know that I thought of you this morning as per every other morning and I've been praying to whoever is hearing me out that you deserve a much better life and to have someone who will hug you when you are lonely and whenever I can't be there for you.)

Taken from two songs I know my cousins would know who sang them and how much it means to us.

那是谁忘了放风筝握紧一点
捡起了那年的秋天

那是我忘了将幸福握紧一点
感谢你最后的相约

等一个晴天
我们会再相见
你说了风吹我就听见
笑着说再见
就一定会再见
心晴朗就看得到永远

感觉到你还在身边
那是秋牵回忆的手温暖一点


夏天的午后
老老的歌安慰我
那首歌好象这样唱的

任性和冲动
无法控制的时候
我忘记
还有这样的歌

我以为这就是我所追求的世界
然而横冲直撞被误解被骗
是否成人的世界背后总有残缺

我怀念过去单纯美好的小幸福

好孤独

原来外婆的道理早就唱给我听
下起雨也要勇敢前进

I miss you...

Hope - Just This Week...

I have got to be the sort of worker most hated by employers. Once again, I'm on MC. Please do not judge or doubt for I am genuinely sick. It's times like these that I wish I'm healthy and be back in office working my arse off. Being on MC is not exactly what I would love to do. It's miserable to stay at home or to go to town alone to see the doc. Woke up this morning, usual time set by the biological alarm. Still sniffing, went on Facebook to greet the usual folks. Everything seemed dead. Even Mr Sibeh Woo Eng Como has a packed schedule.

All I wanted was someone to have lunch with... :(

I was talking to Saabretooth this morning on how this blog has become my outlet and he reminded me that it's someone else's inlet as well. He also encouraged me to list down the great things I dream to happen this week and be pleasantly surprised. I'm skeptical if this will make me feel better or just sink me even lower. Let me try to be realistic...

- Close that big one that I've been waiting to happen for months.
- Get a big paycheck to pay off my debts & buy my ticket to NY.
- Wean off Facebook. (Just a little...)
- Have tao huay. Hot hot one.
- Do a heel side one wake jump.
- Have some time to drop by my cousin's place.
- Be asked to go on a proper date.
- Get sensibly drunk and not feel guilty about it.
- Win one mahjong session.
- Lose 3kg and stay there.
- Get a versatile and pretty dress.
- Buy some books.

And yes, someone to lunch with... Thank God for helicoptor salesmen stuck in Changi.

Rudolph

A video clip on one of out wakeboarding session. This clip shows the first ride which wasn't the better ride but as you can see, everyone in the group is improving at a tremendous speed. Thanks to CharmmyKitte for doing the video up.



For the whole day, I've been sniffing and sneezing. My nose was ultra runny and it feels like there's an endless supply of eggs in my body and they happen to break one after another and the white part will just come flowing down without being able to control it at all. My bins are filled to the brim with used tissues and I blew my nose so hard, my ears are blocked and I'm constantly high from the antihistamines I take. The excessive nose blowing is causing my nose to peel. Now, I look just like Rudolph. The rest of the face looks like it's dead and hiding the excrutiating pain from the "puah puay".

Been playing Texas Hold'Em on Facebook with bster and was telling him how sad our lives are and he had to rub it in and left me all alone there while he went to catch "House". Actually, it's kinda fun had I not been this high from Atarax (Hydroxyzine) and at 10ish, I'm already drowsy and all ready for bed.

The monsoon is here again and it's just pouring out there, day in day out. Makes a sick girl like me just wanna stay in bed. Getting cold... Perfect for snuggling.

Suck The Mucus In And Deal With It

Sitting in front of the notebook on a Sunday evening, sipping off my mug of steamy hot Milo and chomping down BBQ flavoured Twisties despite my sore and infected throat, reminds me of how frighteningly lonely it can get. Especially when my nasal cavities are all blocked, sneezes explode every 30 seconds and mucus flows without me being able to feel anything at all. You must be thinking how disgusting it is and just so you have an image, I'm buried under a pile of used and unused tissues, my eyes are red and watery, I'm sniffing away and can hardly breathe. Every time I blow my nose, it's ultra painful and at times, traces of blood can be spotted on the tissue. I can still remember vividly in this episode of F.R.I.E.N.D.S where Monica was really sick, someone told her she's not fine if she kept saying fine as fined. I know how that feels exactly. I'm fine-d, well maybe not,

Mahjong was arranged to be played just about now but was cancelled. I have to say I was weirdly relieved as much as my hands are itching for a couple of games. However when the harsh reality cruelly reminded myself that I'm left all alone to deal with the fear of being alone all by myself just makes me wanna double click on the tear inducing Chinese songs on my iTunes and to hide behind my cold and fat comforter swallowing back the tears, stubbornly refuse to cry from obvious loneliness. But the tears seem to follow the pull of gravity more than my unconvincing and evidently weak will power. Hurhur...

Well, I can deal with tears but I can't deal with the even more blocked nose that accompanied the undesirable tears. It's times like this that makes me want that simple hug and to lie in bed, refusing to get up. The bed just feels too big for a petite girl who's vertically challenged like myself and too empty for a longing heart, longing for that warm embrace. Ok, this is getting too disgusting even for me to read... Alright, I'm all fine. I'm just sick and sick people just naturally feel cut off. I'll be fine. I know I am. I know I will be. I am fine. I am.... I really am... I... really... am... Am I?

听见别人提起你的名字
我就会脸红
一张有你合照的照片
看来看去都不厌倦
坐在寂寞了很久的窗前
不停地想念
从没有对谁的支字片语
可以读了好几百遍
像童话中的世界
如今出现在真实人生的眼前
再苦闷的时刻
也有彩虹
哪怕只是轻靠你的肩
像传说中的爱情
如今出现在真实人生的眼前
当你拥抱着我
轻轻地对我说
你会爱我到永远
我就像cinderella
等到了寻找我的他
爱情的的过程
总会有泪有挣扎
有你的温柔
我就什么都的不怕
我就像cinderella
等到了寻找我的他
等待你是我付出最甜蜜的代价
快乐的cinderella
真爱得到了回答

If only...

Wakeboarding Diaries

Wakeboarding has proven to be incredibly addictive. As a victim and speaking from personal experience, withdrawal symptoms are nothing compared to being unable to ride the wakes for anytime more than a week. Some time ago, I organised a wakeboarding event for one of the car forums as a nice gesture and all of thse who went out with me the first time, was deadly hooked so the outing which was meant to be an one off event, became a regular weekly affair.

Today was one of the most enjoyable wakeboarding sessions so far. We had a good size of about 6 people in total. A little bigger than the ideal number but well, there's no perfect number for any number of hours booked and with our favourite instructor, he's really flexible with the hours. (If you're keen on taking up wakeboarding, drop me a line, I'll pass you his number. Excellent instructor.)

The most amazing improvement could be seen on Como. He could barely ride the last time and today, he's crossing the wakes. He's the perfect example to show, perseverance pays. The confidence level did played a crucial role as well. Ah Orh was a little tensed today but after managing to loosen those nerves a little, he was as good as before, if not even better. Somehow I feel that there's alot on his mind today and not merely wakeboarding stuffs. Then again, he's a happy man now since he managed to sell his OrhLulu 7 to an appreciative owner and probably loves his 22 inches.... of rims. Haze is improving very constantly and will soon be able to cross the wake without much problem. Charmmy and her Kitty were just testing out their boards and loving the times out there. For myself, not the best improvement ever but it did made me reinforce my basics and soon, I'll be able to pop the wake... Woohoo!

The addiction is poisoning this group of people so bad that they're planning and scheming to skip work just to go wakeboarding. Ridiculous! Ah hem...

Everyone's gonna be away next week so I need to find new kakis to ride so if you're keen, let me know.

Time to visit the driving range tomorrow which I've not done so since January 2005.

Happy Birthday Jie

It seems like yesterday that I was your Mom's flower girl and now, you're 21! For the past 21 years, we have spent priceless times laughing madly, singing totally off sync, shopping like crazy bitches, together. It's been crazy over the past year especially with my grandma, your great grandma passing on leaving all of us shattered. I still can vividly remember how we hugged and wailed when we took our last look at her. Everything seemed to have gone past in a flash and you're such a big girl now. You're making me feel old.

I may be your aunt but I can't deny that you've always been like a baby sister to me, someone whom I'd want to protect and shelter. Maybe due to our age, we seem to get along like the best of friends. I know life may seem good to you and all but you are a strong girl like your Mom and you keep everything to yourself. I don't know how much unhappiness you've gone through and will go through in life but I know you have the ability to breeze through it and you should also know, I'll always be there for you.

We will grace your party for a while before we go for our "Old Ladies" drinks at Walas. Enjoy today and laugh like you always do. Have a great year ahead.

Queer Eye From The Straight Girl

Homosexuality was the title of the post I created last night but didn't had the courage to post it because I don't really know which side of the fence I'm actually standing myself. There were varying opinions and voices on the forum and I do agree and disagree with things they say regardless of whether they are for or against homosexuality. For myself, I think i know very well that it is innate and can't be changed but on another hand, since I'm not born with a preference that is not accepted by the social norm, I wouldn't know if people are indeed born with a different set of chromosomes. Looking at countries like Thailand, it makes us believe that it's more of the environment or the upbringing and less of the inborn characteristics. Doesn't statistic show that most homosexuals "beginnings" occur in single gender schools as compared to a co-ed school? Having said that, what is wrong with homosexual relationships?

Well, according to "Muscle Tree", God did not intend for male and male, or female and female to have sexual relations. As the popular saying goes, "God made Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve!". Society owes its continued survival to the family, founded on marriage. Men and women are given very special capability in their union coming together and be able to procreate and in Gen 1:28 of the Holy Bible, he blessed the man and the woman with the words "Be fruitful and multiply".

And speaking about legalising homosexuality unions, the inevitable consequence would be the redefinition of marriage, an institution devoid of essential reference to factors linked to heterosexuality. From the legal standpoint, marriage between a man and a woman were to be considered just one possible form of marriage, the concept of marriage would undergo a radical transformation, with grave detriment to the common good.

For me, I do not have any issues with my queer friends and on top of which, I always feel that the society should have a high level of tolerance but not necessarily acceptance. But what "Muscle Tree" really got me thinking, that this is a "foot past the door" technique and eventually, legislation is unavoidable. From there on, society might transform and lose it's meaning. I cannot disagree but neither will I agree on this. I do feel that on a certain level, homosexuality is still unavoidable and being put under the magnifying glass and blown up focusing on the evils by bad press.

I've always felt that everyone should have the basic human right to love whoever they want, regardless of their gender but unfortunately, things are not as simple. To legalise homosexuality unions, there are still so much more to be smoothen out and frankly, this will and should not be done in Singapore in the short run. We're merely the 2nd or 3rd generation from the superbly conservative Chinese who did not go through the Cultural Revolution. I don't know for sure for the other races but for the 70% of Chinese, I think we're not ready as much as some of you might think that we are.

It's better that we tread every step we take with care than to decide to legislate against the general consensus in a rush.

What The Modern Woman Wants by Amanda Chong

SirDucer sent me this email last night and I wanted to share this with all of you. Was thinking of sending to FS Guru but thought, wth, I'll just blog this. Very well written essay by this home grown 15 year old, Amanda Chong from non other than the top school in Singapore, Raffles Girls' School.

Singapore girl wins Commonwealth essay prize!
A 15-YEAR-OLD Singaporean, competing against 16- to 18-year-olds, has won the top prize in a writing contest that drew 5,300 entries from 52 countries.

In the annual Commonwealth Essay Competition, Amanda Chong of Raffles Girls' School (Secondary) chose to compete in the older category and won with a piece on the restlessness of modern life.

Her short story, titled What The Modern Woman Wants, focused on the conflict in values between an old lady and her independent-minded daughter.

'Through my story, I attempted to convey the unique East-versus-West struggles and generation gaps that I felt were characteristic of young people in my country,' said Amanda, who likes drama, history and literature and wants to become a lawyer and a politician. (SnugLoft: Once she learns of the reality of being a lawyer, she's going to regret it. It is not going to be what she dreams to be.)

Chief examiner Charles Kemp called her piece a 'powerfully moving and ironical critique of modern restlessness and its potentially cruel consequences'. The writing is fluent and assured, with excellent use of dialogue. Amanda gets (S$1,590). A Singaporean last won the top prize in 2000, said Britain 's Royal Commonwealth Society, which has been organising the competition since 1883. Singaporeans also came in second in the 14- to 15-year-old category, and fourth in the under-12s. Other winners included students from Australia, Canada and South Africa .
========================================

What the Modern Woman Wants
By Amanda Chong Wei-Zhen

The old woman sat in the backseat of the magenta convertible as it careened down the highway, clutching tightly to the plastic bag on her lap, afraid it may be kidnapped by the wind. She was not used to such speed, with trembling hands she pulled the seatbelt tighter but was careful not to touch the patent leather seats with her callused fingers, her daughter had warned her not to dirty it, 'Fingerprints show very clearly on white, Ma.'

Her daughter, Bee Choo, was driving and talking on her sleek silver mobile phone using big words the old woman could barely understand.

'Finance' 'Liquidation' 'Assets' 'Investments'... Her voice was crisp and important and had an unfamiliar lilt to it. Her Bee Choo sounded like one of those foreign girls on television. She was speaking in an American accent. The old lady clucked her tongue in disapproval.

'I absolutely cannot have this. We have to sell!' Her d! aughter exclaimed agitatedly as she stepped on the accelerator; her perfectly manicured fingernails gripping onto the steering wheel in irritation. 'I can't DEAL with this anymore!' she yelled as she clicked the phone shut and hurled it angrily toward the backseat. The mobile phone hit the old woman on the forehead and nestled soundlessly into her lap. She calmly picked it up and handed it to her daughter.

'Sorry, Ma,' she said, losing the American pretence and switching to Mandarin. 'I have a big client in America. There have been a lot of problems.' The old lady nodded knowingly. Her daughter was big and important. Bee Choo stared at her mother from the rear view window, wondering what she was thinking. Her mother's wrinkled countenance always carried the same cryptic look. The phone began to ring again, an artificially cheerful digital tune, which broke the awkward silence.

'Hello, Beatrice! Yes, this is Elaine.'! Elaine. The old woman cringed. I didn't name her Elaine. She remembered her daughter telling her, how an English name was very important for 'networking', Chinese ones being easily forgotten. 'Oh no, I can't see you for lunch today. I have to take the ancient relic to the temple for her weird daily prayer ritual.'

Ancient Relic. The old woman understood perfectly it was referring to her. Her daughter always assumed that her mother's silence meant she did not comprehend.
'Yes, I know! My car seats will be reeking of joss sticks!' The old woman pursed her lips tightly, her hands gripping her plastic bag in defence. The car curved smoothly into the temple courtyard. It looked almost garish next to the dull sheen of the ageing temple's roof. The old woman got out of the back seat, and made her unhurried way to the main hall.

Her daughter stepped out of the car in her business suit and stilettos and reapplied her lipstick as she made her brisk way to her mother's side. 'Ma, I'll wait outside. I have an important phone call to make,' she said, not bothering to hide her disgust
at the pungent fumes of incense. The old lady hobbled into the temple hall and lit a joss stick, she knelt down solemnly and whispered her now familiar daily prayer to the Gods.

Thank you God of the Sky, you have given my daughter luck all these years. Everything I prayed for, you have given her. She has everything a young woman in this world could possibly want. She has a big house with a swimming pool, a maid to help her, as she is too clumsy to sew or cook.

Her love life has been blessed; she is engaged to a rich and handsome angmoh man. Her company is now the top financial firm and even men listen to what she says. She lives the perfect life. You have given her everything except happiness. I ask that the gods be merciful to her even if she has lost her roots while reaping the harvest of success.

What you see is not true - she is a filial daughter to me. She gives me a room in her big house and provides well for me. She is rude to me only because I affect her happiness. A young woman does not want to be hindered by her old mother. It is my fault. The old lady prayed so hard that tears welled up in her eyes. Finally, with her head bowed in reverence she planted the half-burnt joss stick into an urn of smouldering ashes. She bowed once more.

The old woman had been praying for her daughter for thirty-two years. When her stomach was round like a melon, she came to the temple and prayed that it was a son. Then the time was ripe and the baby slipped out of her womb, bawling and adorable with fat thighs and pink cheeks, but unmistakably, a girl. Her husband had kicked and punched her for producing a useless baby who could not work or carry the family name.

Still, the woman returned to the temple with her new-born girl tied to her waist in a sarong and prayed that her daughter would grow up and have everything she ever wanted. Her husband left her and she prayed that her daughter would never have to depend on a man. She prayed every day that her daughter would be a great woman, the woman that she, meek and uneducated, could never become. A woman with nengkan; the ability to do anything she set her mind to. A woman who commanded respect in the hearts of men. When she opened her mouth to s peak, precious pearls would fall
out and men would listen.

She will not be like me, the woman prayed as she watched her daughter grow up and drift away from her, speaking a language she scarcely understood. She watched her daughter transform from a quiet girl, to one who openly defied her, calling her laotu; old-fashioned. She wanted her mother to be 'modern', a word so new there was no Chinese word for it.

Now her daughter was too clever for her and the old woman wondered why she had prayed like that. The gods had been faithful to her persistent prayer, but the wealth and success that poured forth so richly had buried the girl's roots and now she stood, faceless, with no identity, bound to the soil of her ancestors by only a string of origami banknotes.

Her daughter had forgotten her mother's values. Her wants were so ephemeral; that of a modern woman. Power, Wealth, access to the best fashion boutiques, and yet her daughter had not found true happiness. The old woman knew that you could find happiness with much less. When her daughter left the earth everything She had would count for nothing. People would look to her legacy and say that she was a great woman, but she would be forgotten once the wind blows over, like the ashes of burnt paper convertibles and mansions. The old woman wished she could go back and erase all her big hopes and prayers for her daughter; now she had only one want: That her daughter be happy. She looked out of the temple gate. She saw her daughter speaking on the phone, her brow furrowed with anger and worry. Being at the top is not good, the woman thought, there is only one way to go from there - down.

The old woman carefully unfolded the plastic bag and spread out a packet of beehoon in front of the altar. Her daughter often mocked her for worshipping porcelain Gods. How could she pray to them so faithfully and expect pieces of ceramic to fly to her aid? But her daughter had her own gods too, idols of wealth, success and power that she was enslaved to and worshipped every day of her life. Every day was a quest for the idols, and the idols she worshipped counted for nothing in eternity. All the wants her daughter had would slowly suck the life out of her and leave her, an empty soulless shell at the altar.

The old lady watched her joss tick. The dull heat had left a teetering grey stem that was on the danger of collapsing. Modern woman nowadays, the old lady sighed in resignation, as she bowed to the east one final time to end her ritual. Modern woman nowadays want so much that they lose their souls and wonder why they cannot find it.

Her joss stick disintegrated into a soft grey powder. She met her daughter outside the temple, the same look of worry and frustration was etched on her daughter's face. An empty expression, as if she was ploughing through the soil of her wants looking for the one thing that would sow the seeds of happiness. They climbed into the convertible in silence and her daughter drove along the highway, this time not as
fast as she had done before.

'Ma,' Bee Choo finally said. 'I don't know how to put this. Mark and I have been talking about it and we plan to move out of the big house. The property market is good now, and we managed to get a buyer willing to pay seven million for it. We decided we'd prefer a cosier penthouse apartment instead. We found a perfect one in Orchard Road . Once we move in to our apartment we plan to get rid of the maid, so we can have more space to ourselves...' The old woman nodded knowingly.

Bee Choo swallowed hard. 'We'd get someone to come in to do the housework and we can eat out-but once the maid is gone, there won't be anyone to look after you. You will be awfully lonely at home and, besides that, the apartment is rather small. There won't be space. We thought about it for a long time, and we decided the best thing for you is if you moved to a Home. There's one near Hougang-it's a Christian home, a very nice one.'

The old woman did not raise an eyebrow. 'I've been there, the matron is willing to take you in. It's beautiful with gardens and lots of old people to keep you company! I hardly have time for you, you'd be happier there.'

'You'd be happier there, really.' Her daughter repeated as if to affirm herself. This time the old woman had no plastic bag of food offerings to cling tightly to; she bit her lip and fastened her seat belt, as if it would protect her from a daughter who did not want her anymore. She sunk deep into the leather seat, letting her shoulders sag, and her fingers trace the white seat. 'Ma?' her daughter asked, searching the rear view window for her mother. 'Is everything okay?' What had to be done, had to be done. 'Yes,' she said firmly, louder than she intended, 'if it will make you happy,' she added more quietly.

'It's for you, Ma! You'll be happier there. You can move there tomorrow, I already got the maid to pack your things.' Elaine said triumphantly, mentally ticking yet another item off her agenda. 'I knew everything would be fine.' Elaine smiled widely; she felt liberated. Perhaps getting rid of her mother would make her happier. She had thought about it. It seemed the only hindrance in her pursuit of happiness. She was happy now. She had everything a modern woman ever wanted; Money, Status, Career, Love,Power and now, Freedom, without her mother and her old-fashioned ways to weigh her down... Yes, she was free. Her phone buzzed urgently, she picked it up and read the message, still beaming from ear to ear. 'Stocks 10% increase!'

Yes, things were definitely ! beginnin g to look up for her... And while searching for the meaning of life in the luminance of her hand phone screen, the old woman in the backseat became invisible, and she did not see the tears.