THE FAT CLUB

I've blogged about "The Fat Club" some time ago while talking to "Jit Eh Knight" then my computer screwed up and it was all deleted. Totally pissed. It was a really really long entry with detailed descriptions of all my big big brothers. After having mid-night dim sum which i really regretted having but enjoyed it nonetheless, I'm going to try to recreate a similar post and add in additional comments and a picture of them when i get home. What has dim-sum gotta do with these people right? That's because i was talking to "Mr Bright" and talked about these guys and realise how much memories there are behind us. You might find new and interesting stuffs everytime you come back to this post to read it again since i'm going to add more stuffs within this one or two days.

Here's a picture of most of the members of "The Fat Club",


"Tua Tao" aka "Razor Ramon" (7th from the left of top row - The Groom) is well-known for his rubber-band time. He got married recently and is having a ball in Shanghai right now. "Red Bean Soup", his wife, had stopped working and is now a full time wife shopping away in Shanghai. I wish i can be there... His wife is like the perfect person for him. Apart from her, nobody can possibily take the ridiculous shit from him. Don't be mistaken, he's not a bad person, in fact i think he's one of the smartest and matured person in the entire group and relatively more considerate than some idiots among us. His sister was my buddy in primary school so i kinda know his entire family, er sort of. Got closer to him since... I guess since i knew "Ketaya" and we made it a point to meet everyone after work to probably catch a movie and have dinner. "Ketaya" and "Tua Tao" had been friends since forever!

"Ketaya" (Second from the 1st Row) is the king of "The Fat Club" until "Gor Gor" took over. "Ketaya" may be big but he's a softee inside. He's probably the sweetest person in the group or rather the sweetest person i've ever known. He doesn't show it like the way he shows off his hundreds of gigabytes of "colourful" videos but i know, he's a man with the heart in the right place. It's a pity that he continues to make little progress in his love life. He's a really attractive person. His personality makes him a very popular figure among this group. You've gotta love this gentle giant.

"Gor Gor" (3rd from left of 1st Row) is "Sleazy Sweetie"'s big brother, as in the blood related sort. "Gor Gor" has been almost like a real big brother to me and sayang me like his real baby sis. I still have a text message he sent me that went, "U know wat? I still think u r a very misunderstood & sweet gal despite wat others say abt u. Like an uncut diamond! I wld hv pamper u to death if u r my real baby sis." We'd go to the KTV and he'll just sit there to listen to me sing, it's fun but can be embarrassing but what the heck right, they're all my big brothers. I try to pick up a couple of Jolin Tsai's song just to please him since he's totally in love with Jolin Tsai. I know he loves me like a big brother but DON'T ever try to matchmake me. Well, unless they meet the cut of the ultimate stringent Fat Club test. Ha!

I used to hate "Sleazy Sweetie" (Not in the picture due to RESERVIST - HAHA!) to the max. He never fails to irritate me, poke fun at me, suan me, disturb me but i know, deep down, he seriously cares for me. Whenever i'm down and out with all sorts of problems, he's always there to give me the hug that i desperately need and console me. But of course at the very same time, he'll grumble as to how stupid i can be to fall into certain traps when this bunch of guys have already set the extreme examples of what sort of tricks guys pull and hope guys go about misleading girls and why guys are such. He'll just say that i never learn then hug me then send me home. I'm glad he found his little Thai girl and that he's a happy man now. You're always be my shoulder, right?

"Jit Eh Knight" (3rd from Right - 1st Row) is the kind of guy you wish he's your boyfriend because he's just so understanding, sweet, considerate... But you sort of fall into the "friends zone" with him very comfortably faster than you know it. Well at least he's got like the sweetest gf on earth. She's a gem. they look perfect together and well, equally funny. Although "Jit Eh Knight" cracks jokes that makes you wanna pull all your hair off, you learn to appreciate his sort of humour and take left nipple jokes like a pinch of salt. (Have to say this before he murders me, he's not fat!)

"Dog Lover Egg" (Second from Right - 1st Row) is someone i'll always have fun with. We blast down the KTVs in Singapore, we sing like we've just escaped from IMH, the fun we had in KTVs are beyond words. He's someone who will sing, scream, laugh with me, ALL THE TIME. At the same time, we're like food buddies. We love food, all sorts, the more fattening, the better it is. Haha. He's hell of a joker and never fails to crack me up. He's got a Maltese that won so many competitions and has so much money that it had to get it's own bank account and the dog's already enough sponsorship to last it's lifetime. Dog's life. How ridiculous.

The 1st on the left of both rows, they're an entity, "Tai Tai In Making" and "Prank Meister". They're the funniest couple you'll ever meet. We will always come up with some sort of prank or idiotic plans. During Tua Tao's wedding, when the above picture was taken, "Prank Meister" came up with this wonderful plan to fool "Black Sheep" (The Fat Chubby thing on the right of the picture).

Apparently, "Black Sheep" was interested in one of the waitresses and under peer pressure, he gave his number to the girl. "Prank Meister" got me to call him since the poor boy hasn't got my number. Well, you see, he hates me cuz i fight with him over the last chicken wing ALL THE TIME. Well this chubby thing actually believed that i'm his "Siew Ling" and he never stopped texting me for the next two days. But i felt so bad the next day that we had to do our usual Simpang thing, get him out and told him the truth. You will never believe how hard we laughed. Poor chap.

The 4th head from the right is "Mr Nice Guy". He's "Gor Gor"'s best friend and he's like this big brother always looking out for me. He's always there, without fail, to man my bag when i go socialising and drinking at Balaclava or when i needed people to listen to me. Ya he's a man of few words and he always listens.

The other fatties who aren't in this picture, apart from "Sleazy Sweetie" will be "Filipino Husband" and "Civic-ing".

I guess it's not too much to say i grew up around "Filipino Husband". I think i knew him since forever and he used to stay just almost right opposite me. So i just got to shout and he'll pop his head out of the window and we'll talk. But he's happily married now so don't know him well enough at this point in time to be able to comment on anything. I just wish that he's happy.

"Civic-ing" is the skinniest among all of them and he always say he's very fit for a 30 year old man and i must say, he is. As far as my memory serve me, he's always been driving a Civic and he's getting a new one soon! He's like my personal cabby, whenever i'm lost i'll just call him and he'll be screaming, "what building do you see now?". He's my buddy and i love hanging out with him cuz he makes me laugh all the time with his silly brainless humour. Whenever i feel lonely and needed someone to have dinner with me, he's always there. But he never joins us for Simpang nowadays... Because he lives in reality time and we're all living in borrowed nocturnal time. He's a good man and i know life will be good to him.

I've tried rewrite this as much as i can remember from history. It may not be very well written because i'm mentally and physically exhausted these couple of days. But all of the above that i wrote, truly came within the voice inside me. I love the bunch of you and you guys have created lovely prints in my life which i'd love to have it with me all my life. This bunch of Big Gor Gors have always taken very good care of me like a baby sister. They've saved me from many empty lonely voids that i'd have never gotten out of without them. You guys are the BEST!

原点 - 现在他在你的身边就对他好一点

拥抱的时候心情有点痛
也去提早感受到寂寞
离开的时候只听见沉默
除了沉默我还能怎么做选择
别对我抱歉别总觉得对我亏欠
现在他在你的身边就对他好一点
不要再让你们的爱败给了时间
既然遇见了永远就不要说再见
不要再让你们的爱输给了永远
我们经过那么多考验
最后还是回到了原点

总有那一天相遇的瞬间
确定那些冷漠的从前已走远
别对我抱歉别总觉得对我亏欠
现在谁在你的身边就对谁好一点

我应该就走开就算感情还在
我应该就放开对他不再依赖
忘了曾有过的片段这是属于你们的未来

不要看到你们的爱败给了时间
我能愿选择离别没有一句怨言
直到你能若无其事聊起了从前
我才发现彼此都了解
默契是最宝贵的语言

Happy Birthday to The Funniest Boss Ever

Happy Birthday, "Comedy Boss"!

It's the birthday of my Singapore office's boss. The last year, it must have been a great year for him since, he's got a new baby and of course, he hired me! Well, not forgetting the big placements he made and tolerating me whenever i come in late.

"Comedy Boss", if you ever read this while spying on me, it's been great working with you and for you. I'll try to do it better but i can't promise i'll be early everyday. In this coming year, have more fun, make more money and probably try for another baby. When you're so free to be reading this, it's about time you gave me a raise!

Carpe diem!

V Day Refugee

We were so late today. Met BR on the train and we both have puffy, swollen eyes. Anyone can tell we're terribly sleep deprived. Serve us right for watching TV till the wee hours on this only night that we can rest our livers from all the alcohol during the week. At the rate we're NOT resting, i doubt our livers will see any improvement.

BR, i don't care if you're going to "old folks home" on Valentines' Day but i'm extending my invitation to you to spend it with me. Alright, i'm pathetically appealing to you to spend it with me. C'mon, take pity in me. I don't wanna spend V Day looking at idiots madly in love walking around and i can't find a place to sit down for dinner. Maybe we should just come out and get some alcohol in our systems and go home for an early night. Well, i know you will be immersed in your bed of roses with "o'folk", i'm just trying my luck.

I do not want to spend my V Day with "Domestic Help Royalty"! If anyone of you have plans, mahjong or bowling or pool or alcohol or movies, just bring me along and save me from all the torture. Otherwise, i'll just have to say yes to "Domestic Help Royalty" and go on another unexciting date with him. It's so sad to be screaming "DATE ME!" on the internet and i'm still being picky here with whom i wanna spend it with.

You know what, i'll buy some popcorn and stay at home to watch the DVDs i've bought 2000 years ago and haven't got a chance to watch.

Jesus Take The Wheel

Today was pretty aimless except for BR's effort to get enough people to satisfy our mahjong crave. Mahjong urge was satisfied with painful loss of instant cash. It's just part and parcel of gambling i guess and i'm all ready for it. Chinese New Year is expected to be alot worse than this. The past few years, the amount of loss and winnings on our family's in between games was enough to give anyone a small fortune. I must admit i've donated quite a bit there. All in all, it's all good fun.

The biggest loss today was to be my brother's paymaster for his Chinese New Year shopping. He's still studying part time and his miserly pay wasn't enough to pay for new clothes so i thought i'll be a nice sister to get him stuffs. I didn't quite hear the thank you i was expecting to hear but i felt happy that i could provide for my family now though not in a big way, i'll just start small.

I'm at this crossroad that i don't want to rush my life. My career is barely a career but i hope i can do it bit by bit and build my "empire". I hope i can excel in what i'm doing because i've decided to stay where i am and do something i like. I remember seeing this from somewhere, "Love your job and you won't have to work a single day in your life". I can't say i'm loving my job right now because there's just so much that i have to do and i think i can do alot more than that but it's a stepping stone and inevitably part of the learning process. I will grit my teeth and get over this and i shall emerge a winner. I want and will be a winner.

My love life is barely in existence. Valentines' Day is just round the corner and the sms from my "Jie Mei" selling roses just seem like it's laughing into my face. There was one year, my "Jie Mei" sent me flowers for V Day because i never seem to get past a V Day without being alone yet again. I told "Miss Flower" that some women do long to be in a relationship sometimes just because we desire to be in one and you may not even love the player of the game at all. Maybe it's just sour grapes because i haven't found the player to this games. We all want to find someone who will pamper us and love us, how many of us have found them and realise that we like them as well. I would give my everything but if there's only someone who would want to take this everything. Few would, those who would just doesn't encourage me to want to pass them my all. Haven't i come to an age that i should just be less choosy? Beggers can't be choosers, ain't it? I wish someone can just hold my hand, he's someone i can look at everyday as i wake up from my bed and hope i'll just stay in bed for another second just because he's there with me. Some people will never be the person whom you would want to spend your Sunday mornings sunggling with, some people just choose not to.

I'm tired of this game. I don't want to be a pawn or even the game. I don't want to be a player. I just want to be a part of you and your life. You'e someone i'm longing to meet but i guess, i haven't met you yet.

Part of a song by Carrie Underwood:

Jesus take the wheel
Take it from my hands'
Cause I can't do this on my own
I'm letting go
Give me one more chance
Save me from this road I'm on
Jesus take the wheel

Volvo S40 T5

Was at my boss' poolside bbq and got to drive my other boss' brother-in-law's car. Did that sound confusing? Alright then, i got to drive the S40 T5 supped up and the handling, grip, pick up was just fabulous. Now i really want that car. It has always been the car i wanna buy to be driving on our roads but the misfortune being, i can't afford it, for now that is. The ride was smooth, suspension was a big hard but pretty expected given the gigantic rim size. Simply love it. I want that car!

Began with copious amount of champagne over the afternoon. Food was alright, a little too oily. The combination of oily food and alcohol was just disgusting and i really felt like throwing up. I didn't puke but it continued to feel really disgusting as the day went on.

BR called and asked if i wanted to do dinner. Thank God we had Chinese. Then she suggested mahjong. which really hyped me up for a while until we couldn't find players. Ran through my phone list and no, can't find a single soul. So now, i have the craving to play mahjong and no one would entertain me.

Just came back from St. James and it's actually my first time there. Swa Koo right? Bellini was alright, jazz is always easy and soothing but after a while, i got tired. I wasn't quite drunk, little tipsy but i didn't had like alot of alcohol today. In fact after the guzzling of champagne in the afternoon (Which i expected it to wear off by the end of dinner), i only had like two sips of whiskey at Bellini. I guess with all the unhappiness inside me, it was easy to want to feel drunk and you just get really high easily.

I'm too sleepy, going to bed. Thanks for visiting my blog guys. Haven't got much interesting stuffs recently but i'll fill you guys in with more interesting stuffs whenever i can. It's so crappy that i met so many cute guys out there but fuck lah. What the fuck is wrong with me?

Pain

It has never been easy to define pain with words. Pain had been a heart wrenching experience for me, physically and emotionally. When in pain emotionally, it's weird that you can actually feel the physical ache tugging your heart. It's the sort of feeling which makes you feel like crying and at times you can find tears to pour it out, at other times, you just bear with the pain and hope that you can scream out loud and someone hears you and comes over to give you a hug in their strong arms. More often than not, the latter scenario never happens. Drinking makes asking for hugs easy. However, when you're in the hug of another, you're sceptical as to whether it's the hug you have been longing or desiring for.

Crying is a process whereby one is able to let go of part of the pain through their actions but what if we're unable to tear. The pain remains. No amount of alcohol can wash the pain away as much i'd want it to. Many believe miracles will happen, i know it wouldn't but you just hope for things that will never happen to happen to you. We always have some space for hope even though the chances are near impossibility. Pain is indescribable.

I wish you're here with me...

Food, Drinks and More Drinks

It's been a fun day except for the running around the entire early part.

As per every other month, we have a day we do afterwork drinks and today is the day of the month. Dinner was at Tapas Tree @ Clarke Quay. Food was alright but the service sucked big time. Do not order the red sangria, urgh pooo... Didn't quite left the place till late. We were headed for Ministry of Sound and it wasn't fantastic. The crowd... What crowd? The dance floor was empty and mind you, it was already 11pm. The night wasn't that young.

Next was Cafe Del Mar. According to BR, it was the perfect place for eye candy. Wasn't too packed but sure was enjoyable. I like it there 'cept for the fact that i was in jeans and it was really tough to get out of the bloody place. It's not only right in the other end of Sentosa, it's like some 5 or 10 mins walk from Rasa Sentosa. Luckily, Dad is always to my rescue. Love Dad.

5 Important Lessons

1 - First Important Lesson

Cleaning Lady

During my second month of college, our professorgave us a pop quiz. I was a conscientious student and had breezed through the questions until I read the last one:"What is the first name of the woman who cleans the school?"

Surely this was some kind of joke. I had seen the cleaning woman several times. She was tall,dark-haired and in her 50s, but how would I know her name? I handed in my paper, leaving the last question blank.

Just before class ended, one student asked if the last question would count toward our quiz grade."Absolutely," said the professor. "In your careers, you will meet many people. All are significant. They deserve your attention and care, even if all you do is smile and say "hello".

I've never forgotten that lesson. I also learned hername was Dorothy.

2. - Second Important Lesson

Pickup in the Rain

One night, at11:30 p.m., an older African American woman was standing on the side of an Alabama highway trying to endure a lashing rainstorm. Her car had broken down and she desperately needed a ride. Soaking wet, she decided to flag down the next car.

A young white man stopped to help her, generallyunheard of in those conflict-filled 1960s. The man took her to safety, helped her get assistance, and put her into a taxicab.She seemed to be in a big hurry, but wrote down his address and thanked him.

Seven days went by and aknock came on the man's door. To his surprise, a giant console color TV was delivered to his home. A special note was attached..It read:"Thank you so much for assisting me on the highway the other night. The rain drenched not only my clothes, but also my spirits. Then you came along. Because of you, I was able to make it to my dying husband's bedside just before he passed away... Godbless you for helping me and unselfishly serving others."

Sincerely, Mrs. Nat King Cole.

3 - Third Important Lesson

Always Remember Those Who Serve

In the days when an ice cream sundae cost much less, a 10-year-old boy entered a hotel coffee shop and sat at a table. A waitress put a glass of water infront of him."How much is an ice cream sundae?" he asked.

"Fifty cents," replied the waitress. The little boy pulled is hand out of his pocket and studied the coins in it."Well, how much is a plain dish of ice cream?" he inquired. By now more people were waiting for a table and the waitress was growing impatient."Thirty-five cents," she brusquely replied. The little boy again counted his coins."I'll have the plain ice cream," he said.

The waitress brought the ice cream, put the bill on the table and walked away. The boy finished the ice-cream, paid the cashier and left. When the waitress came back, she began to cry as she wiped down the table.

There, placed neatly beside the empty dish,were two nickels and five pennies.. You see, he couldn't have the sundae, because he had to have enough left to leave her a tip.

4 - Fourth Important Lesson

The Obstacle in Our Path

In ancient times, a King had a boulder placed on a roadway. Then he hid himself and watched to see if anyone would remove the huge rock. Some of the king's wealthiest merchants and courtiers came by and simply walked around it. Many loudly blamed theKing for not keeping the roads clear, but none did anything about getting the stone out of the way.

Then a peasant came along carrying a load of vegetables. Upon approaching the boulder, the peasant laid down his burden and tried to move the stone to the side of the road. After much pushing and straining, he finally succeeded. After the peasant picked up his load of vegetables, he noticed a purse lying in the road where the boulder had been. The purse contained many gold coins and a notef rom the King indicating that the gold was for the person who removed the boulder from the roadway. The peasant learned what many of us never understand!

Every obstacle presents an opportunity to improveour condition.

5 - Fifth Important Lesson

Giving When it Counts

Many years ago, when I worked as a volunteer at a hospital, I got to know a little girl named Liz whow as suffering from a rare & serious disease. Her only chance of recovery appeared to be a blood transfusion from her 5-year old brother, who had miraculously survived the same disease and had developed the antibodies needed to combat theillness. The doctor explained the situation to her little brother, and asked the little boy if he would be willing to give his blood to his sister.

I saw him hesitate for only a moment before taking a deep breath and saying, "Yes I'll do it if it will save her." As the transfusion progressed, he lay in bed next to his sister and smiled, as we all did, seeing the color returning to her cheek. Then his face grew pale and his smile faded. He looked up at the doctor and asked with a trembling voice, "Will I start to die right away".

Being young, the little boy had misunderstood the doctor; he thought he was going to have to give his sister all of his blood in order to save her.

Why Women Love To Sing Along With 张惠妹

Went to chamber 82 yet again. It's not the sort of place you'll be wowed with but i had quite a bit of fun there. When i first went there, some sleazy alleged thief brought me there and i was quite sceptical about the place until the owner came out to play games with me. When i needed someone to sing the duet with me, i can always get him. Yes you guessed it, it's a KTV sort of pub, but it's quite a hangout i must say. I brought BR there on one occasion when i seriously needed some alcohol in my system and we've been going there since. Well, afterall it's near our offices.

Went there with BR and "Mr Bright" yesterday, we discussed about why 张惠妹's songs are inevitable picks whenever we go to KTVs and such. Well the reasons are simple,

• They make good listening.
• They make your singing sound good.
• We're usually familiar with it because at some point in time, her songs will come in as some sort of medication to heal the weary and broken soul.
• The lyrics are fantabulous.

One of 张惠妹's songs that i'd like to blog about is 我要快乐. It takes a woman of a certain age to be able to appreciate the song in full capacity. I wouldn't say that i'm old and i've came a long way but you need to have gone through life, rejection, work, loneliness, stress, loss and various sorts of bitterness in life to be able to appreciate the song on a deeper level.

又被爱伤了一遍
无所谓当作成长
刚刚走开的人
烟还点着味道却淡了
我并不是天生爱寂寞
却比任何人都多
就算把世界给我
我还是一无所有

我要快乐
我要能睡的安稳
有些人不抱了才温暖
离开了才不恨
我早应该割舍

我要快乐
哪怕笑的再大声
心不是热的
全都是假的
只有眼泪是真的

把从前想了一遍
谢谢了伤我的人
想做乐观的人
每种雨声听了都不冷
我并不是天生爱寂寞
却比任何人都多
就算把世界给我
我还是一无所有

我要快乐
我要能睡的安稳
有些人不抱了才温暖
离开了才不恨
我早应该割舍

我要快乐
哪怕笑的再大声
心不是热的
全都是假的
我的决定是对的

Another song is 原来你什么都不想要

"Gor Gor" sang it to me the day before and I sang it last night. I've never quite sang this song in the KTV because it's pretty old and oversung. There are bound to be someone around who will sing this song at some point down the evening. Yet again, this song says so much about how many women out there think and feel about somethings or some people in life.

我知道这样不好
也知道你的爱
只能那么少
我只有不停的要
要到你想逃

泪湿的枕头晒干就好
眼泪在你的心里只是无理取闹
以为在你身后
是我一辈子的骄傲
原来你什么都不想要

我不要你的呵护
你的玫瑰
只要你好好久久爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好
贪心也好
哪个女人对爱不自私不奢望

我不要你的承诺
不要你的永远
只要你真真切切爱我一遍
就算虚荣也好
贪心也好
最怕你把沉默当做对我的回答

Look At Me For The Person I Really Am

Few people will deny that I'm often misunderstood. Not that i'm an angel or anything, but i tend to do things that upsets people without realising it. Sometimes i don't know what i did and i still don't.

"Jit Eh Knight" told me last night that i have a homage instinct towards bad boys. I don't. I don't even look forward to belong to any entity. I'm just a sucker for sweets. Why don't people get the entire picture i'm getting before they pass their judgement? "Jit Eh Knight", you're not the one who passed the judgement, just a comment i've heard from elsewhere.

I often sink into modes of lows and i can't quite get out. I may look like i'm the happiest person in the world, i'm not. Why am i saying this? Don't get me wrong, i'm not fishing for sympathy and don't even feel anything like that for me, i don't deserve it and i don't want it.

Tell me what have i been doing wrong? Why am i like the common jinx and trash?

Grandma's 100 Days Anniversary

Dear Cousins, Nieces, Nephews,

I'm too lazy to email it to everyone so just right click and save it at your own pleasure. Today's Grandma's 100 days anniversary and we will always remember her. Look how grand her new home is, envious?

We will miss her. We will always love her.

假装

Had a good chat with BR just now. Given all the unhappiness we have had in this friendship, i can't deny she's always been there when i needed a shoulder. I admit i'm a super lousy drinker but she puts up with my nonsense from time to time. When Princess needs to make a lifelong career decision, she was there to reaffirm what i thought but hesitated. She made doubts into decisions. I should know and should remember, my career is of utmost importance now. When a woman is financially independent, things will fall into place. Right now, i want to be the independent woman i've always wanted to be.

The more i sink into the "i think i miss him" shit, the less i'm becoming the person i actually was and the person i've always aspired to be. Most people around now knows i'm hungry to be right on top of the vicious food chain and i want to make a difference to people around me. I want to be able to be the "contact" or "network" that gives off the "wow" factor.

I will still think of Dum Dum. I'm not someone who likes something and withdraw almost immediately. I need a closure even if it is not a possible route. I will make the closure happen. Maybe i'm not the one...

I have to admit it wouldn't be easy for me to step out of this circle and step into another one for a long time to come but i suppose it's good that i can put time into my career. Guess this is the only consolation i can give myself at this point in time.

This is one song that truly describes me, right now... I'm going back to bed to snuggle with myself and drown myself with repetitions of this song, constantly reminding myself of the pain i'm in and that i should get out of in a heartbeat.

呼吸着一种孤独的味道
心跳在你沉默以后慢慢的被淡忘掉
我笑了笑反正你看不到
我要的幸福遗落在你怀抱

当爱失了焦
那些最初的美好
早被你搁在一角
街上拥挤人潮走着看着都是摧眠符号
记忆停不了
穿过读你的心跳
穿过想你的味道
我只想不被打扰

假装多好
我只要只想要再拥有一秒
去相信你的拥抱
一直会让我依靠
继续等待
还心甘情愿的不想逃

当爱失了焦
那些最初的美好
早被你搁在一角
街上拥挤人潮走着看着都是摧眠符号
记忆停不了
穿过读你的心跳
穿过想你的味道
我只想不被打扰

假装多好
我只要只想要再拥有一秒
去相信你的拥抱
一直会让我依靠
继续等待心甘情愿不想逃

假装多好
依然是依然是暧昧的tone调
一个人无理取闹
两人世界的煎熬
我被自己困在自己设下的圈套

像是驼鸟相信时间是唯一解药
视而不见傻到了无可救药
其实早明了你的爱已随风飘
想要找再也找不到

假装多好
我只要只想要再拥有一秒
去相信你的拥抱
还心甘情愿的不想逃

假装多好
依然是依然是暧昧的tone调
一个人无理取闹
两人世界的煎熬
我被自己困在自己设下的圈套

假装自己已解开冰冷的手铐

女人心事

东区的咖啡座幽暗的沙发里
总有几张熟悉的脸
那种聪明带点防卫的气质
想放弃却又不甘心的样子
越过她的肩膀空洞洞的视线
摩登女子灰色心事
那种以为自己什么都可以
喝了酒却又哭得像个孩子
我听见(爱我的人在哪边)渴望的泪
我看见(伤心的故事一遍遍)我的从前
曾经我也痛过我也恨过怨过放弃过
在自己的房间里觉得幸福遗弃我
如果没有分离背叛的丑陋
怎么算是真爱过
请你试著相信一爱再爱不要低下头
别怕青春消逝就不信单纯的美梦
我在这岸看着你游
为你的坚持感动
你会的有一天会幸福的

我会幸福嗎﹖

Rotten Sunday

I've got a myriad of things to blog given the day has barely passed and i haven't even had any food. Bear with my grumbling...

I supposed i was overwhelmed by exhaustion yesterday. My brains were all filled by negative and upsetting things. Spoke to "Oscarised" last night and i mentioned if she's back in Singapore, she could come snuggle the Saturday night wth me and watch at DVD at my place or something. Then we came to realise, if she's in Singapore, she wouldn't even have time for all these ro for me for that matter of fact haha. But due to the time difference, when i'm lazing at home in the evening, she's also preparing to tie up loose ends and head for the bed so we could chat till the cows come home and we did. It's odd how lucky i am to have friends saying "when i come back to Singapore, i'll whack the person who upset you" or "i'll send the ah beng to beat that fellow up. How can he do this to you?" I'm usually the protective big sister because i've always felt the need to protect my little brother but in reality, i always feel vulnerable and it's nice to know that you're protected by people who will attempt to shield the pain for you. "Oscarised" , can we make it a point to spend more quality time when you decide to come back for good? Oh and i'd like to play mahjong with your sister... and possibly your Mom. You've got the best parents in the world and send your parents a kiss from the Princess when you speak to them the next time.

When guys say you're more than a friend, do they mean, you're a good friend, a buddy, a special friend, a special someone or "you're just a friend and i don't wanna upset you so don't read too much into it."? Just a wonder... Pour in your comments, i'd like to hear your opinions. Tag me!

Would you change your job to think of long term possible prospects or would you stay in a good, possibly better environment that you're already enjoying. Should one be adventurous and to venture out into new grounds and not look back even if you're bitten? I do not want to turn back neither do i want to be adventurous now. I was so courageous at one point in time that it seems as though nothing, absolutely nothing is going to make me stay in what i believe is a shithole. This is NOT a shithole, in fact it's a haven alot of people would love to be in. Am i stupid or what? Should i stay? My heart tells me to but too many complicating thoughts are just telling me to to be less complacent and more adventurous. Do i really want to move?

I was given permission to hire someone at work to help me. This is essentially someone who wants to do a pure administrative role. Now i know why employers have headache and why some candidates simply look good on paper but never turn out to be hired by the prospective employers. A few weeks ago i resorted to telling my colleagues that we should hire this girl because her name begins with a J. You see, everyone in my office has a J name. My ex-boss, my current boss, my colleague, my right hand at work and of course, myself. So we usually shout across the room.. "Jjjjuuu...jjjjeeee....jjjaaa... Argh why are we all JJJJJJ" but it's fun and i even heard they were very excited after they have decided to hir me some months ago. My current boss went back to the office and told therest of the office, "Guess what? She's a J. Jasmine!" To think about it is hilarious.

My dog was whining this morning and eventually woke me up. I'm happy with my weekend timing this time round, i slept early and woke up early. The best part, i had sufficient sleep! Yoohooo!!! It's about time i need to catch up on my anti-aging regime. I'm back on my "rejuvenating, anti-wrinkling" regime that cost me a bomb. I told a friend, "Estee Lauder cheated me of my money". But do you know, Estee Lauder is already the cheaper option. Much much cheaper. Right now i only wanna get a feet scrub. My feet got really rough after hours of running on the sand yesterday. My skin is peeling and my feet look like they belong to a construction worker.

CNY shopping must commence immediately! I've met up with some people twice and got no shopping done except skin care. I'm not going to wear my aging skin and go out for CNY. This year i can't "bai nian" because my grandma just passed away but Dad says as long as we don't bring oranges or wish people, we're fine. So must still look good for CNY right? ok i'm too tired to blog anymore, to be continued after i get some food.

I just had cornflakes and i'm back in action. Spoke to Inuka the Pig, she's quite clever to see what was bothering me and she was spot on. Do not ever doubt a woman's sixth sense. Just like how Blood Red guessed "the flower", it all came true. "The flower" really wasn't simple. The flower had the dog's attention, all the time. BR, i so need to tell you this on Monday. It's funny yet frustrating but i could only say, a woman's sixth sense, is simply unbelieveable.

I'm having my period which is why i wasn't in the best of moods these days. I've been grumbling about everything, anything and barely anyone knew what i was talking about. Maybe i should just heed "Gay Club Ringleader"'s advice to do the Mirena thing. But i'm not even sexually active, it's a bit expensive right. The day i deicde to do that, you know i've found someone i love and decided to do some family planning. "Gay Club Ringleader" is bringing "No Idea Why We All Call Her Rachel" to do it and because he told me that, i knew their relationship is stable and heading north. I's just a feeling. A girl wouldn't say yes to something this invasive, not needle or anything but invasive as in the discomfort of a foreign object stuck up inside you constantly releasing hormones regulating substances. Then again, friends on the Pill had been encouraging me to take it just because i'm physically active and it does affects my sports and beach days. So Mirena or Pill?

Today's Grandma's 100 days. I don't know how to blog it anymore. Spoke to Inuka the Pig and Black Pepper yesterday, it's such a torment to bear with the pain of losing a loved one. Losing the person who loves you the most and brought you up, the pain is indescribable. I still can't stop tearing. I wish she can be here when the world fails me, when guys fail me, when work fail me, when friends fail me, i know she for one, will never fail me.

On this rotten Sunday, i only wanna rot with my dog. Get a drink. Cry in my bed. Sleep and dream about beautiful things and wake up tomorrow to reality.

Dum Dum, I want and i need to talk to you.

Sore

I have to say it was a great deal of fun today to be out with these boys.

Right inside me at this point in time, i'm not particulary interested to talk about what we did but to give you a brief idea, the rain came intermittently but didn't quite interrrupted the softball, touch rugby, dodgeball, etc. The sun was weak but nonetheless, present and its effects was seen on my arms and legs. I have to admit there was a huge deal of fun, laughter, sand, hugs, sweat, pain, oil... It was great.

On a separate note...

There was some sort of anticipation and dismay deep inside me. Maybe it's just PMS, maybe it's just a fact that i can't digest. The dismay didn't quite follow the anticipation, it is the unexpected that caused the dismay. Rather i should say it is the thing that i didn't quite want it to happen but some part of me knew it was happening but denial got the better of me and when it is right in front of your eyes, you can't help but feel stupid for believing things some people said. I have told myself so many times not to believe in stuffs people say but see it for myself, i got taught the best lesson recently.

I thought you had me at hello and i was told that i was being liked and missed by you. I thought this vehicle was going at first gear then it picked up to second but in actual fact, the vehicle didn't move at all. It's the cars beside me moving that gave me the illusion that i was moving.

The hug never came. The hug will never come. I rather never to have anticipated the hug. I wish you've never looked at me in my eyes so i wouldn't miss the smile glimmering in your eyes.

I was stupid to have told you how i felt and thought what you said were genuine about how you felt. But when i saw you, you just were not the person i've been texting with. I felt like an idiot near you. To think of it, i've never quite heard you over the line, maybe i was in a dream i just refuse to wake up from and indulged myself to sleep through it longer. I never thought i'd say things like, you never had time for me because i knew better, that you had more meaningful things in your life which is true. But you never ever had that one minute to call to say hello. The truth is i'm just hallucinating. Whenever i stole a glimpse, it was never something i would want to see. Sometimes you feel so near, at other times, you're just faraway. I guess now you're just getting further and further away. I've lost the grip which i've never possessed. Now i've even lost grip in myself. I'm just a loser.

Interesting Description of A Capricorn Woman

Tag and let me know how true this thing is...

CAPRICORN WOMAN

A tall (??) slim (??), cool(??) and quiet(??) woman. Once she is mad she can be very fierce. She can work better than some men and she is very highly confident woman. In her opinion, a woman is not just a flower or decoration at home or in an office and certainly not the weaker sex who needs protection. She likes to control and hide her weak emotions.

She will never try to change anyone, but she will learn to accept them as they are. If she does not like someone, she will not comment or criticise but she will completely ignore that person.

She hates plastic and artificial flowers because it make her feel that you are not being sincere. She loves real flowers and it's scent. She loves a guy who wear after shave cologne. If you are the type of a guy who wear your jeans one month before washing, or wear old sneakers, then you can forget about her.

She loves music and nature even there is a rare case otherwise. She loves to go picnic in nature, so if you don't have so much time for her, you can take her fishing too. (Ya right...)

She is not as jealous as the Aquarius or Leo woman, but do not cross the line. Better not to see her get mad, especially in front of public when she feels like she's losing face. She loves to make herself up and dress perfectly and she's very neat, so never rush her for this matter.

She has her own goal in life and does not care if you have a doctorate degree or not, if she thinks you are not bright then she will not care about you at all. She likes smart people by character not by certification. If you can not show her this quality, go and take a bus and go to the next stop.

She does not like a dreamer who talk about his dream but never put his hands in action to make it happens. Don't bother to tell her "everyone is doing it, you should do it too", or "I think you should do it, it's good foryou", because she will do what she wants to do only.

She is a neat and tidy person, so if your apartment is a pigsty , do not take her there. If you go out on a date with her , try to be presentable such as nice and clean clothes, clean nails or else it will be your last date.

She is a cool type and will not nag, so easy on your ears. She is a slow but sure type. She will always respect and honor you and will never try to make you lose your face. If she loves you, she will help you in anything you do. She likes to help people and expect nothing in return. If she asks you for a favor and does not get one, she will feel very disappointed.

She has very high hopes and faith and believes in her own confidence than believing in"Luck". If she is your wife, you will have nice and clean home and a gourmet cooking. If your parents visit your house, they will be pleased. She is a 3 in 1 means , a perfect mother, a perfect housewife, a perfect wife or you could say "happily ever after".

6 weeks; 6 months; 6 years

If there's anything that's going to deter anyone from going into a relationship or marriage, here it is:-

Dating process:
6 weeks : I love U, I love U, I love U.
6 months : Of course I love U.
6 years : GOD, if I didn't love U, then why the hell did I propose?

Back from Work:
6 weeks : Honey, I'm home.
6 months : BACK!!
6 years : What did your mom cook for us today??

Gifts:
6 weeks : Honey, I really hope you liked the ring.
6 months : I bought you a painting; it would fit the motif in the living room.
6 years : Here's the money. Buy yourself something.

Phone Ringing:
6 weeks : Baby, somebody wants you on the phone.
6 months : Here, for you.
6 years : PHONE RINGING.

Cooking:
6 weeks : I never knew food could taste so good!
6 months : What are we having for dinner tonight?
6 years : AGAIN!!!!

Apology:
6 weeks : Honey muffin, don't you worry, Ill never hold this against you.
6 months : Watch out! Don't do it again.
6 years : What's not to understand about what I just said??

New Dress:
6 weeks : Oh my God, you look like an angel in that dress.
6 months : You bought a new dress again???
6 years : How much did THAT cost me?

Planning for Vacations:
6 weeks : How do 2 weeks in Vienna or anywhere you please sound??
6 months : What's so bad about going to Istanbul on a charter plane?
6 years : Travel? What's so bad about staying home???

TV:
6 weeks : Baby, what would you like us to watch tonight?
6 months : I like this movie.
6 years : I'm going to watch ESPN, if you're not in the mood, go to bed, I can stay up by myself.

Alcohol...

The limit of tolerance was peaked last night.

Drinks followed naturally after dinner with "Blood Red" and my old time church choir mate, "Speedy Gonzales". What was initially an after dinner drink grew into games of bluff which of course meant more alcohol. For someone who's a cheap drinker like myself, wine for lunch was fine, whiskey after dinner was fine, both were fine, game drinking wasn't. I wasn't in the best mood and my mates knew it so she made sure i drank and i did. Happily. To a point where i couldn't hear much longer, i knew i was gone. Then again, i could still sing while waiting for the washroom. I wasn't quite super duper drunk, i think i was just really upset.

But this morning, i felt much much better. Alcohol does work to a certain extent! I'm feeling so much better today. I do not want to be bothered with nitty gritty stupid boys stuffs now. Right now, career come first, says Blood Red and i'm going to be doing just that.

Ah Poo Neh & The Big Brown Bear

When we were bored, we did this...

CCM says:
i was at the airport one day
BR says:
when a Bear ran in
CCM says:
the crowd dispersed in a millisecond
BR says:
suddenly the Bear grabbed an air stewardess
CCM says:
from behind and she screamed, while trying to break off the bear's grip
BR says:
an on looking indian cleaner felt that this was his chance to do something heroic
CCM says:
so he went to fetch the broom from the toilet
BR says:
and took a rug as his cape
CCM says:
he ran as fast and he could with his cape flying gloriously,
BR says:
then he "zam" break cos he realised he wasn't wearing boots & all super heroes wore boots!
CCM says:
but no worries, he could do the "breaking" dance
BR says:
HE spun towards his trolley & found his bright neon yellow boots
CCM says:
he jumped into the boots like how puss jumped in his
BR says:
meanwhile the distressed air stewardess was screaming:" HELP!!!"
CCM says:
Upon seeing his beloved in the bear's arms, he ran to the bear and said
BR says:
:' eh u!! blardy idiotic teddy bear.. u gib me my girl back"
CCM says:
The angry bear then turn around and roared with his greatest might
BR says:
ah neh stuffed the end of his broom up the bear's ass before he realised wat was happening
CCM says:
then Ah Neh said, "don't you dare touch friend's girl, she's from TIGER airways hor, you want problem you come to me, my name is Ah Poo Neh!"
BR says:
The bear in pain released the girl
CCM says:
and started crying
BR says:
the miraculously the bear Started to talk in a human voice
CCM says:
he said, "my SIA girl left me 10 years ago and married a voodoo guru"
BR says:
"i Loved my girl alot & vowed to get her back"

To be continued...

Shattered

Has love always been defensive?

What happened to love at first sight or that love is all we need?

Shouldn't falling in love be as natural as "click - you know it or you don't"?

Didn't Romeo and Juliet entangle themselves in this undying love because they were simply in love and not think about the other realities in life?

Is falling in love exclusive of external factors? For many of us, it's not. It means the difference in age, social status, financial status, etc. For once, i think love should just be love and be exclusive of all other factors. Other times, it's the emotional barrier that's harder to break through. We have all gone through the ego inflation and deflation which makes your heart beat faster and more confusing than the New York stock exchange's biddings.

But the harsh reality is, we all have some sort of defensive mechanism to reject what may post possible hardship for us in future.

Can we ever put down our defense to try to experience what love can actually bring? I've tried but very soon, the defensive mechanism went back right on and i'm wary as to whether i can be truly in acceptance again. Exhaustion has set in, the pain is still tingling. Gosh, i just realise how much i desire for you to use your strong arms to pull me close to your chest, using your hand to hold my head close to your chest so that i can listen to your heartbeat, putting your other hand around me protecting me from the world and gently kiss me on my forehead and tell me, "Dear, you belong to me and only to me."

This is like a dream shattering into dust and gone with the wind...


从来不相信我的世界可以有多完美
痛苦寂寞还有一些疲惫
不允许他人随意进入我的零度空间
宁愿孤独懒的再去想谁
俩个人一起是否只是得到一种安慰
挣脱过去然后忘记一切
没想过有天我的结局忽然全部改变
谁会抓住我的无力双臂

怎么会哭
(谁错谁对为谁抱歉)
不会再哭
(谁错谁对为谁憔悴)

走入零度空间等到一切分裂
就算爱的危险我们一起面对

来不及的防备没听过的誓言
要我怎么学会多了爱的明天

走出零度空间终于一切分裂
就算爱的很累我却不会后悔

放下所有防备一切都无所谓
逃出黑暗世界开始新的明天

新的明天

俩个人一起是否只是得到一种安慰
挣脱过去然后忘记一切
没想过有天我的结局忽然全部改变
谁会抓住我的无力双臂

怎么会哭
(谁错谁对为谁抱歉)
不会再哭
(谁错谁对为谁憔悴)

走入零度空间等到一切分裂
就算爱的危险我们一起面对

来不及的防备没听过的誓言
要我怎么学会多了爱的明天

走出零度空间终于一切分裂
就算爱的很累我却不会后悔

放下所有防备一切都无所谓
逃出黑暗世界开始新的明天

新的明天

走出零度空间终于一切分裂
就算爱的很累我却不会后悔

放下所有防备一切都无所谓
逃出黑暗世界开始新的明天

新的明天
新的世界

Somewhere In Between

"Blood Red" wants me to listen to this song by Lifehouse and told me it says alot about my current mood. It's great to be able to bitch with her after such a long time and our 12 or 13 year relationship has not just ended without news. I knew we could have gone on and on at Burger King but we didn't had to because whenever i need to, i know you'll be there. Thanks babe. I love you and i know you're happy, that's the most important. I'll be right here whenever you need these puny shoulders.

I cant be losing sleep over this, no I cant
And now I can not stop pacing
Give me a few hours, Ill have all this sorted out
If my mind would just stop racing

Cause I cannot stand still
I cant be this unsturdy
This cannot be happening

This is over my head but underneath my feet
Cuz by tomorrow morning Ill have this thing beat
And everything will be back to the way that it was
I wish that it was just that easy

Cuz Im waiting for tonight
Then waiting for tomorrow
And Im somewhere in between
What is real, and just a dream
What is real, and just a dream
What is real, and just a dream

Would you catch me if I fall out of what I fell in
Dont be surprised if I collapse down at your feet again
I dont want to run away from this
I know that I just dont need this

Cause I cannot stand still
I cant be this unsturdy
This cannot be happening

Cuz Im waiting for tonight
Then waiting for tomorrow
And Im somewhere in between
What is real, and just a dream
What is real, and just a dream
What is real, and just a dream

"Inuka the Pig" & "Empty Box"

It's always nice to see couples in love, no matter how long they have been together. Even the occassional bicker and names calling sounds really affectionate. Met this couple recently through a friend, "Inuka the Pig" and "Empty Box". I don't deny that every couple will have their own problems but when they have the unique solutions and the amount of give and take in that relationship they put in, you know it will work. Well unless there's a freak sudden problem that is.

"Inuka the Pig" is this sweet little girl who is probably one of the best person to talk rubbish to over MSN. "Empty Box" is this utterly unromantic bloke but you know he loves "Inuka the Pig" a hell lot. I'm so envious.

They spend their weekends snuggling and visiting Sheba and Inuka at the zoo. They don't talk all the time but she trys and he does it too. He knows he's not romantic but he's heeding advices from the "Loveless Guru" and well, that's me. The way he proclaims his love with icons of him kissing her is simply too sweet for my weak decaying tooth.

"Inuka the Pig" - You're a really nice girl and i like talking to you. I know you'll be a great buddy. Cheers!

"Empty Box" - Time you give her the empty box, dude!

9 of My Nieces and Nephews

Just found this Picture and according to Didi, this is one of the two copies of this picture so it's really precious. For those who are reading and you do not happen to be one of my cousins or nieces and nephews, the above picture shows part of the nieces and nephews contingent.

I hope i get all the names correct, well at least by Ah Boy's knowledge of his cousins,

from left to right, Ah Bee(Yao Dong), Ah Cai(Orh Gui Zai), ?? (Whoever this is, please own up - just wondering, is it Hiao Hiao Elvin?), Gor Gor (Kelvin), Ah Jing, Ah Mei, Eddie, Ah Boy (Kevin) - He's my age so you roughly know when this picture was taken, Ah Boy Jie Jie.

They were all terribly cute right. Ah Boy told me that this coming Chinese New Year he'll be getting all his cousins to to his place to take pictures so we'll get the updated version after CNY hopefully. Looking forward...

I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing

This post is probably not going to contain one of my best language ability, not even on a prep level. My mind is confused and i'm really unable to organise my thoughts and be able to write them in any sensible sequence. Being the legally trained person i am, i had to disclaim and in anycase you feel like scolding me for being such a nutter or a brainless idiot, please feel free to call and scold me because my tears and hugs need an outlet.

I have to admit that i haven't been feeling good these days. Spoke to "I Got My Name While Learning To Ride A Horse" earlier on and he was talking about his gf giving him major problems because she's too insecure. Now they're taking a week off in their relationship. M, Come back to Singapore! I'll give you a hug!

I did try to convince him that he's lucky someone loves him so much and such but surprisingly, i was defending the girl and not him. However when i heard the details of the story, he does have my sympathy and i do agree the girl went a little overboard, then again, it's for love, it can easily be forgiven and i would forgive people who demand because they love. I told him he's lucky that he's got someone to snuggle in bed with on Sunday mornings and have someone to hug and kiss him with no quantiy ceiling. Value the person who is next to you. You'll know it sucks when you've got no one. I was in a relationship where the other party was too possessive and overly jealous, i survived because i knew he loved me. I've learnt to live with it, i'm glad i didn't leave him because he loved me too much.

However, this whole overly possessive thing is coming back to me like a recurring nightmare. I'm not with anyone, let alone someone who is possessive. I think i've fallen for someone whom i shouldn't be falling for. No not my boss, no not my colleagues, no not my cousins, no not some French bloke, just a man who is full of himself, clever but sends "i'm actually stupid" text messages, someone whom i'd love to laugh with and snuggle in bed on Sunday mornings, someone whom i'll look forward running half the world with, someone whom i'd want to go to the movies with, someone whom i'd wanna walk the dog with. I suppose i'm not bright enough to be sending out all the bloody wrong signals.

Don't get me wrong, not one of those, "i wanna flirt with you but don't want a relationship" sort of signals. He thinks i'm open which i am on certain spectrum but on a closer inspection, i'm actually one of the most conservative creatures you'll ever meet, though it's not quite reflected in my actions and dress sense. Well since he thinks i'm open, he sends me really really sweet text messages which sends smiles on my face stretching from ear to ear everytime i see them. (BTW, i smile at the slightest sweet thing he says - gosh i'm mad!) The messages were filled with hugs and kisses and so i thought he might be interested in me and i did reciprocate those messages thinking he's someone nice, funny, clever, cute, interesting whom i'd want to go out with.

Until today when the frequency of acting stupid was getting a little too much for me to take(well because usually guys will make certain move which he never did and i do not want to play the guessing game any longer), to begin with i wasn't in a great mood and when you actually do you scroll down to read my last post, you'll know. I was straight about the hugs and kisses and it was misleading me, and if he hadn't had any intention to bring this forward, he should stop. He mentioned that anyone who falls for him will be in all sorts of trouble and i replied that i'm probably in trouble. Up to this point, which of you guys out there does not get what i'm trying to say. It's already so explicit. Get it?

The reason why i said he's a clever man trying to act like a blonde in his texts, God knows from which messages, i was promoted to the "buddy status". Girls reading this, when someone(usually a girl but in this case it's a guy) says we'll be friends or you felt like a friend or we're in the friend zone or you're such a buddy, it only means "you're a nice friend but you're not good enough to be my passenger if i only have a coupe" or "you haven't got legs like Giselle hence you don't qualify to be my girl" or simply, "i do not like you in the romantically inclined way." I read it in a more subtle way, i do not want to be in any relationship with you but if THE girl comes by, all hell will break loose and i'll just ignore whatever principles i have. Basically, the guy just doesn't like me, or anyone for the matter of fact, enough to commit. Gosh i was stupid to even think he's got a liking, i do think too highly of myself, haven't i. But hey, i'm VERY eligible ok? I'm beginning to sound incoherent, ain't i? I'm losing it! It's HIS LOSS! Right? (*breaking down after screaming that)

Having said all that, i don't mind being the buddy and i guess i'll end up being the buddy, the Aunt Aggie when he ever encounters such problems with someone else. I always end up as the buddy don't i? Maybe because i'm just like "one of the guys".

He mentioned before that this is a nice song, i don't disagree and i loved this song since school days but it's just too sarcastic to be hearing it now.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
'Cause I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing

A Letter To A Faraway Place

My tears can't be stopped.

I can still feel your presence, so near yet so far.

It's been almost 3 months and i still can't help feeling the loss. I couldn't cry when you first left. I was needed. I needed to be strong for everyone. I needed to be strong for my Dad. I needed to be strong for my uncles and aunties. My tears were stopped. All the running around stopped me from thinking. All the emotions were hidden. After the funeral, i thought all was over. I got to know the nephews and nieces i never knew existed. They became my new best friends and i love their company.

When night falls and when i'm all alone on my bed, staring at the empty space you used to sleep, when i was trying to ignore your snores and trying to get to sleep, my tears just came running down. I wish you can be here, i want you to snore so i know you're right beside me, keeping me company, loving me, caring for me...

In front of everyone, i seemed the emotionless girl without tears and laughing just after you passed on. In fact i'm quite happy that you're not in pain anymore I can't help missing you. I can still see your face when you were smiling, when i visited you, when you were weak and bedridden, when you lie in your final resting place.

Will you visit me in my dreams tonight?

I can't stop crying. Please come back... I know i'm silly. I should know better that this will never happen but i miss you too much. I wanna be the kid you held in your arms again and tug your blouse, "please don't go", "please come back", "please don't leave me here alone". I miss you.

All Good Things Come To An End

Loves Nelly Furtado's songs because you can just sing along with it. First heard this song during one of the mahjong sessions, didn't quite hit in or got what it meant but heard the live version, it was really good and speaks about alot of young female executives out there walking right smack in the middle of Raffles Place, finding a good place to spend some time during lunch hour and hopefully find something to look forward to after the clock hits 6.30pm at the end of today being the end of a stress loaded week. How many of us actually do have anything to look forward to after work apart from the usual martinis and pray that there'll be some excellent company.

Although the rhythm of the Nelly Furtado's song, "All Good Things Come To An End" is rather bouncy, not exactly perky, guess i just wanna say rhythmic. The lyrics were quite a shocker when i Googled it. Felt like some secret shoutouts from deep inside me which i never quite realised. Here it is, ENJOY!

Dogs were whistling a new tune
Barking at the new moon
Hoping it would come soon so that they could die

Honestly what will become of me
I don't like reality
It's way too clear to me
But really life is daily
We are what we don't see
We missed everything daydreaming

Flames to dust
Lovers to friends
Why do all good things come to an end

Travelling I always stop at exits
Wondering if I'll stay
Young and restless
Living this way I stress less
I want to pull away when the dream dies
The pain sets it and I don't cry
I only feel gravity and I wonder why

And the sun was wondering if it should stay away for a day until the feeling went away
And the clouds were dropping and the...
The rain forgot how to bring salvation
The dogs were whistling a new tune barking at the new moon
Hoping it would come soon so that they could die

Personally, some snuggling with an ideal snuggler is all i'm looking forward to after a hard day's work.

The following lyrics is for my buddy, "Blood Red", we've come a long way and i know this is how you feel. Go out shopping girl and thanks for being there for me. I don't wanna be a doormat, i wanna be the dreamgirl. I only wanna be HIS dreamgirl but i also know, i do not want to need him if i'm not needed by him and you know girl, i've woken up from my senses. Like i've been saying these days, "Happiness is being needed by the one you love" and i wanna be happy, just like your Auntie "I'm Pretty and I'm Free So I'm Happy". I am me. Simply me. I want to be happy.

Pussycat Dolls - I Don't Need A Man!
I see you looking at me
Like I got something for you
And the way that you stare
Don't you dare
'Cause I'm not about to
Just give it on up to you
'Cause there are some things I won't do
And I'm not afraid to tell you
I don't ever want to leave you confused

The more you try
The less I buy it
And I don't have to think it through
You know if I'm into you

I don't need a man to make it happen
I get off being free
I don't need a man to make me feel good
I get off doing my thing
I don't need a ring around my finger
To make me feel complete
So let me break it down
I can get off when you ain't around
Oh!

You know I got my own life
And I bought everything that's in it
So if you want to be with me
It ain't all about the bling you bringing
I want a love that's for real
And without that then no deal
And baby I don't need a hand
If it only wants to grab one thing

The more you try
The less I buy it
And I don't have to think it through
You know if I'm feeling you

I don't need a man to make it happen
I get off being free
I don't need a man to make me feel good
I get off doing my thing
I don't need a ring around my finger
To make me feel complete
So let me break it down
I can get off when you ain't around

Let it go
Let it go
Let it go
Let it go

I don't need a
I don't need a man, I don't
I don't need a man
I'll get me through
'Cause I know I'm fine
I feel brand new

I don't need a
I don't need a man, I don't
I don't need a man
I'll make it through
'Cause I know I'm fine
Without you!

I don't need a man to make it happen
I get off being free
I don't need a man to make me feel good
I get off doing my thing
I don't need a ring around my finger
To make me feel complete
So let me break it down
I can get off when you ain't around
Oh!

I don't need a man (I'm over you)
I don't need a man (I'm over you)
I don't need a man
(I'm without you)
(I'm over you)

I don't need a man
I don't need a man
I don't need a man

Cramping In...

I'm having this MAJOR stomach cramp today and i prayed like never before on my way to work, i felt like i was dying and ready to just pass out on the streets. I think my prayers aren't working because i was fooling around when they said grace last night and i just went like "Grace, Amen" haha. It's been so long since i met the girls and i miss them big time.

As usual, "Curly Gem" was always there when i needed to whine about all the stupid guys around me and to bring me back into my senses by telling me, "Look, this is what i say when i'm sweet-talking a girl, all the virtual hugs and kisses are NOTHING!" This morning, i realise, i'm still living in denial but "Curly Gem"'s words really rang the alarm and i started to retreat like a hermit being shook out of its shell by this mischievous kid on the beach. I feel that i'm back in my shell and i think my stomach cramp's just makes the retreating way easier. I feel that my whole system is being being shut down this morning, physically & mentally.

I always thought i'm like a guy, whether i like something or i don't, i simply know it right away. Which in turn, makes spending money easy as well. I can walk into a shop and know if i like a certain piece in a millisecond and the decision making process doesn't take more than a couple of minutes. If i don't like it, i'll walk straight out IMMEDIATELY with no hesitation and being the stubborn mule that i am, i will go back to buy THAT one piece even if i can't afford it at that point in time. But if that particular piece does get sold or it's not for sale, then there's nothing i can do. Same thing in life, i know what i want but if that item was tagged and hung on the shelf, i would think it's for sale. But even if it's not, there's nothing much i could do right? But i need to know if it's for sale. How irritating it is if the salesperson come to you and promote this item, telling you the magic it does and how much the item wants to go home with you. The catch, it is NOT for sale! WTF!

Like i mentioned, i thought being that decisive, i'm just like a guy. That was before i found out, i'm still a girl right inside. Girls are the decisive creatures. Men/Guys are the indecisive species. They are the ones who can't make up their mind or decide if they want to walk. I always think that men are like cars (If you've read my blog from some months ago). Whatever car they may be, they are like constantly on the slope facing up. There will always be gravity. You can push this car, it's not going to move much unless the car's engine is started and the foot is set on the accelerator, ready to go. Sometimes it's just best to leave the car stationary, where it was.

Talking about cars, i went to watch One Last Dance last night. My piece of advice, DO NOT WATCH IT at ALL cost! I was trying to avoid yawning so i don't tear but if i don't tear, my eyes were prepared to close. I even saw people leaving the cinema midway, something i was all prepared to do but i thought "maybe the ending will be a pleasant surprise". Ya what surprise? It was utterly boring and to think i adore Francis Ng.

Oh back to cars, how can i not recognise that the yellow ride was a Honda Civic. I should be able to tell one from 2000 miles away. My dear friend, Victor, had been changing his Civic with another Civic and i've taken countless rides and i couldn't recognise it at all???!!! What happened to the nights of roundings at the old national library? How embarrassing! I have whacked my head like 2 million times when trying to get in his super low, super-car wannabe little black car and i can't tell a Civic! Someone kill me! I always felt proud that i can tell an Evo from a Rex or a Ferrari from a Lamborghini by hearing them pass by me (that is not difficult - however, i'm not that powerful as to be able to tell a V10 and V12 yet though) But for the sort of cars most of my friends drive and the car which i've probably spend more time in than any other car, i'm disappointed with my inability to tell that it is the same o'Honda.

It's a curse!

Desperate House-Dweller

If i sounded desperate, no i'm not going to say that's because i am, i am not. I am NOT desperate, do not take pity on me at all! I just felt empty on this PMS-laden day. I'm tired and lethargic. I just need a hug.

My face is zit-infested.

Someone To Love Me Right, That Would Be Very Nice... So Nice

If a picture paints a thousand words, songs are comparatively insignificant to pictures. I've never been this into Chinese songs but i'm still not as bad as my two nieces. From Chinese songs idiots to "we can go ktv by ourselves and we love chinese songs" lunatics, these two cute babies are a huge influence in the music i listen to.

I've never quite liked S.H.E if my readers even know who they are but i always seem to be able to chant according to their songs all thanks to my S.H.E crazy brother who has got S.H.E's posters as his wallpaper, not just for his computer but his room as well. Must i mention that he plays their songs like the recorder's in a really bad shape? He's insane. This chirpy song by the 3 girls kinda send a smile to my face. The upbeat tempo just makes you wanna repeat this song over and again. I'm kind enough to share the lyrics with you people, that is, if you are able to read Chinese characters. Proudly, i don't have a problem with that, i can even draft in Mandarin. (*laughs hysterically)

Here it goes,

S.H.E-触电

风走在我们前面
甩裙摆画着圆圈
花美得兴高采烈
那香味有点阴险

你在我旁边的旁边
但影子却肩碰肩
偷看一眼
你的唇边
是不是也有笑意明显

明明是昨天的事情
怎么今天我还在经历
一丁点回忆都能惊天又动地
想问个愚蠢问题
我们再这样下去
你猜会走到哪里

但请你不要太快揭开还沉默的情话
先让我多着急一下再终于等到解答
太容易的爱故事就不耐人回味啦
像这样触电
就够我快乐熔化

我们就耐心培养萌芽不要急着开花
反正有长长的日记等我们去填满它
在被全世界发现以前先愉快装傻
就这样触电
一直甜蜜触电
直到爆炸

像一年四个季节
都被你变成夏天
我才会在你面前
总是被晒红了脸

像一百万个秋千
在我心里面叛变
被你指尖
碰到指尖
我瞬间就被荡到天边

Was in a "i wanna snuggle up to someone, smell him then slowly fall asleep while watching him" mood last night but the downside, there's no him. Just like a joke we shared in the office - Everything is ready, the bride's all dressed up, got a house nicely decorated with state of the art kitchen and a cosy bedroom with an incredible wardrobe, dream wedding by the beach with the pink and white ribbons is all set, all of you are invited for the reception. Gifts are exempted but please bring the groom with you! Back to what i was trying to say, i digged out Stacey Kent and was running it the entire night. It was great being with myself but after finding myself sending a last good night message out, i knew i wanted something else. There's a reason why my blog is titled "Snuggle With Me". It's like a hidden desire, well not really hidden since you're greeted by how much i desire to be hugged and kissed on the top right hand corner of this blog. But i would like to share this song which lullabied me to sleep last night and i love it.

Someone to hold me tight
That would be very nice
Someone to love me right
That would be very nice
Someone to understand
Each little dream in me
Someone to take my hand
To be a team with me
So nice, life would be so nice
If one day I'd find
Someone who would take my hand
And samba through life with me

Someone to cling to me
Stay with me right or wrong
Someone to sing to me
Some little samba song
Someone to take my heart
And give his heart to me
Someone who's ready to
Give love a start with me

Oh yes, that would be so nice
Shouldn't we, you and me?
I can see it will be nice…

Birthday Hangover

With a glass of shiraz on hand and a late night yesterday, i just want to forget about work and blog about my birthday. Thank you for all the text messages by all who remembered and loves me.

My birthday was smashing! The KTV room was huge so was our laughter. This has got to be blessings of my Grandma watching me from above. I've never felt more fulfilled and loved in my entire life. Most of my closest nices, nephews and cousins were there. I had the most lovely birthday cake, my personal favourite, Passionfruit Meringue, courtesy of "Pretty Ka-Chng". I sang 等一个晴天 by 蔡淳佳 and it had a very special meaning for my "Pretty Ka-Chng" and myself. My eyes welled when i was singing that. I will be posting the lyrics and if i've done it before, just bear with me, it means ALOT to me.

阳光中风筝断了线
往事般落在我面前
那是谁忘了放风筝握紧一点
捡起了那年的秋天

阳光中我住雨里面
你给我风筝和蓝天
那是我忘了将幸福握紧一点
感谢你最后的相约

等一个晴天
我们会再相见
你说了风吹我就听见
笑着说再见
就一定会再见
心晴朗就看得到永远

阳光在抚摸我的脸
感觉到你还在身边
那是秋牵回忆的手温暖一点
我独自散步在从前

阳光在照亮你的脸
难忘你微笑的双眼
那是你让离别可以晴朗一点
你背影我目送到今天

等一个晴天
我们会再相见
你说了风吹我就听见
笑着说再见
就一定会再见
心晴朗就看得到永远

等一个晴天
我们会再相见
你说了风吹我就听见
笑着说再见
就一定会再见
心晴朗就看得到永远

因为很想念
每天都是晴天
心晴朗就看到永远

阳光中风筝飞上天
你笑着回到我面前
让我像那风筝贴着天空的脸
让爱是今生不断的线

Thank you all nieces, nephews and cousins who came to grace the occasion last night and it was my best birthday ever. I look forward to more laughter and fun with all of you. Once again, thank you.

On a different note, men just never seem to get what girls are trying to say right. C'mon, i've posted this ages before, speak up when you feel it or the girl will never know. It's tough for girls to take the initiative, show a little love. It wouldn't hurt. If anything, your life will only be more complete thereafter. I need a hug. That's all i need.

Happy Birthday to Me!

It has got to be my BEST birthday EVER!

I had my first birthday cake two days ago at a friend's chalet. It was a combined birthday with someone i barely knew but the whole 3 days of chalet was insanely fun!. Love playing the bone game seeing "Sir Uncle" gobble down fishballs, "Sir Fit Fit" cursing and swearing on top of his voice, "Sir Canine" grabbing his bone with natural canine instinct. The girls weren't far behind. "Mdm Uncle" and "I-fell-down-while-playing-the-game Sweetie" were my Power Puff girly buddies and we helped each other with fishballs and satays. I LLLOOOVVVVEEEE IT! Thank you, "Sit-At-The-Same-Table-And-Have-Dinner-Together Buddy"

Came to work reluctantly today but it wasn't so bad. No doubt, it's been really busy given my absence for the past 2 days and the emails been piling up but my colleagues were so sweet, they got me a cheesecake from Fullerton and i love it! Will post the picture tonight when i get home, if i'm still not dead. My bestest left hand left me nice smelling stuffs before she went on leave, i think she thinks i stink. Wahahaha!!!

Tonight would be the grand finale and something i really look forward to. I'm going KTV with my nieces, nephews and cousins. My favourite cousin, "Ultimate Power Power Ka-Chng" will be getting me a passionfruit meringue and i already love it when she told me. Will post on the happenings tonight. (Again, if i get home awake.)

Old Friends vs Good Friends

We all have old friends, not in terms of age but for the prolonged period of time since you've met the person, you do give each other hugs when you see one another, you go to his prom night during college, when your loved ones passes on, he'll call to check out on you but these are mere short contacts which cuts off after you press the red button on your mobile. Could it be myself that i wasn't proactive enough in maintaining this friendship?

Good friends are keepers but not that the former isn't. I went out for dinner with one sec school mate late night and it was fun. Though we never had anything non-platonic going on, i feel guilty that i might be partly responsible for his failed marriage. Well you see, wives do get jealous over female buddies and knowing the woman that i am as much as all you girls out there, we're bottomless pits of jealousy. I'm glad at least this friend is THE keeper. We can chat about anything under the sky and not feel offended with mindless comments. To talk about staying together was great and to plan for contingency like if you ever meet a guy/girl and have to move out, what will happen and NO it's not fuck buddy, no sex or even emotions that go further than simply friends are involved or ever will. One day, he will find his princess and i will keep my third eye on the watch because he's really someone who will appreciate a girl the right way. Take this as an advertisement if you wish, he does deserve a good girl.

If his ex-wife is reading this, though it might never ever happen, you have just missed out on the man who loves you more than anything. Your suspicious character had put me as a likely suspect and you couldn't be more wrong. There could be platonic friendster between opposite sexes and we're just one of the many good examples out there. Adn up till today, nothing has changed and never will so you are just so wrong. This mistake is costing you your lifelong happiness and you are bound to live to regret your dumb decision.

Happy New Year!

It's been a year of ups and downs. I've graduated, got a job, lost some love, lost the most important love and found some new ones. Now i've got a new life, new found relatives, new job and new things to grumble about.

Christmas was good this year. Well, my definition of good is not calculated with the amount of or the value of gifts, it's because i've got my favourite cousins, nieces and nephews with me and we had an excellent time. I just hope that the Christmases down the years will be as good or if not, even better. Hope you equally enjoyed yours.

It's only a few more hours to another year and let me wish you a happy new year before it's too late. I'm not used to having new year resolution because i never seem to fulfil them but i hope during the coming year, i can excel career wise and see some results by the 3rd quarter. I also want to be a better person and this should be a lifelong aim instead of an annual one. I also hope i can find true love... Someone who loves me and whom i can snuggle with early in the morning refusing to drag myself out of bed to get to work then he'll drop me at work before bringing himself to his own. I just hope that i don't have the same resolution same time next year.

Have a great new year! Cheers!

Transformer!

Transformer Cybertron was my favourite cartoon and i love Optimus Prime, the leader of the group, just like a cute guy with this chiselled face and multi-talented. I thought i'll never watch transformer again since i'm all grown up and such. Guess what? The Transformer movie will be out next year. Got to watch this...

Watch the trailer!

Feeling Old?

I do not want to sound like a broken recorder so i am indeed repeating this here one last time. Some people have already heard it and probably sick and tired of hearing it so i'm writing this as a form of closure for myself.

I'm feeling old.

I'll be having my birthday soon and no, i'm not hinting for gifts to flow in. I've never ever felt old before. I've always been very chirpy and maybe a little too chirpy for some and in fact, may be unbearable to many. Over the years, i've toned down alot but i can't help being hyperactive when the sugar level repeatedly hit its new high everyday. I'm not aiming to be the most popular person around but i have hit certain lows emotionally when i feel like i've made others felt disturbed by my actions.

I'm feeling old not so much because i'm not in any stable relationship or that my life's not going according to plan. I'm feeling old when i think of my age and i'm still stuck at a career low. It may be premature to even say career low when i've only started work for 6 months but i do feel that i'm not moving fast enough and my biological clock is ticking real fast. Yet again i have to stress that biological clock is not about being a mother, getting married, giving births after births, just physically you can feel your body ticking towards failing health. Back to career, i don't know if certain choices i'm making is right. Maybe i should just wait and watch and see what happens. Maybe i shouldn't be so ambitious and expect things to move faster than i hope for. Maybe i should just feel contented to even have a job. Maybe... Just maybe...

Crashed - The bloke's heart i mean...

Saw this on Sydney Morning Herald and thought it'd be cool to share. For the full story, go to SMH.

I bet the bunch of guys behind him are laughing their big fat arses off. That's like ouch, my favourite car just gone in less than 60 secs. I could have brought it for a nice and slow ride before you crash it into the bright yellow pole. Don't ever do it again, now pass me the key for the new Gallardo you bought.

What I Want For Christmas... A Black iPod Nano

Heard from friends that Coca-cola gave its employees a limited edition iPod nano each in Coca-cola's red and with their logo engraved at the back. How lucky is that? All i want for Christmas is my own iPod nano. I have an iPod elephant right now and it doesn't go with my chic and slim image haha ya right... Ok my image now does suit the elephant one cuz i'm short and chubby but hey, i have dreams alright.

Maybe i'll get myself a birthday present... Oh please let me clear my credit card bills...

Snug Box's Feeling Chilly

Is my blog dying? Is anyone coming? Am i talking to myself? Can visitors please show your presence on my Snug Box. It's there for a purpose. I feel like i'm talking to myself, well i probably am.

Love Of My Life

The Love Of My Life
She gave me her everything. I've tried to give her my all but it's not enough. The love will live in me forever. I love her. I never knew i'm capable of loving someone so much. I don't think i can love anyone else more than i love her. Are you taking good care of yourself in heaven? Are you having a ball with Grandpa? Do you know i really miss you? Do you know life has lost it's meaning without you? Do you know i love you? I really do. Can i hug you?

When A Man Loves A Woman

I was just talking about this yesterday and i got this email today. Really wanna share this with all of you. This is being loved.

1. If you like her...ASK HER OUT already!!!

2. When you hug her, put your ARMS around her WAIST and hold her close.

3. When you walk next to her, get as CLOSE as you can to her.

4. If she's the only one in your life, TELL HER.

5. ALWAYS let her knows how much you like her, love her, or think about her.

6. Give her presents and cards for no reason, SHE WILL RETURN THE FAVOUR...ALWAYS.

7. If she hangs up on you, call her right back.

8. Always offer to pay. If she says NO twice, then let her pay but make a deal that you get to pay next time (offer a date too!).

9. Kiss her lightly every chance you get.

10. Look in her eyes and kiss her on the lips, forehead, or nose.

11. If she says she's cold, don't be an idiot and say "Me too." and stand there; give her your jacket or just simply hold her in your arms.

12. Don't force her to do anything she's not comfortable with.

13. Invite her to dinner or somewhere where you can talk, instead of the movies.

14. Try not to ask her if she's mad at you EVERY TIME you speak to her.

15. Always tell her you LOVE her only if you really mean it.

16. DON'T pressure her to do anything she isnt READY to do. When she is ready, she will let you know. She just wants everything to be more SPECIAL and PERFECT. So appreciate what she does do with you.

17. DON'T go and tell your friends anything that happens between you two, cause it will hurt her and make her mad...and it will NEVER happen again.

I swear by my last penny a woman wrote this.

Really Touching

I watched this when i went to the Young Lawyers' Forum and had a hard time finding it. Now that i've found it, i want all of you to see it. Do i have to say it, yes it's a true story. Love is amazing.

Fun But Disastrous Trip

Hong Kong was fun as usual but you can't believe what actually happened to me. i shall keep you in suspense till the end of this post.

I was told a few hours before i board the plane that i'll be going straight into our Hong Kong office so we had to be in formal attire when we get on the bloody flight. Be begin with, it was already torturous to wake up early in the morning let alone having to work immediately after landing. You may call us lucky, our flight was delayed slightly but it didn't quite made a difference. From the airport express station, we actually walked to the office, on foot of course, lugging ridiculously heavy luggages. Well you see, i do not travel light at all. My toiletries bag itself weighed a tonne. By the time i got to the office, i can deflated entirely.

There was no computer for me so i didn't quite work till a hour later or something while i waited for my comp to be set up. I could have gone to the hotel to take a shower, would have felt much fresher. Not that it mattered, my colleagues there were wonderful people.

Friday night was a night of food and more food, drinks and more drinks and i loved it. Well didn't had much party, we were just too exhausted. But Saturday night was almost insane. We club hopped till the wee hours in the morning and i have to admit, it's been a long time since i've done that and i really enjoyed myself. Having a boss who is a party animal himself, it was "almost" all expenses paid.

Treasure hunt on Saturday was unexpectedly fun. My team was really competitive and we won ourselves each a HKD 100 Dymocks voucher. Photos can be found via a link on this blog. Look for my favourite colleague holding her swanky cam. Other photos can be viewed on http://www.lawalliancetreasurehunt.zoomshare.com - Enjoy!

Sunday was the beginning of disaster. When i left in the cab heading to my next hotel, i realised i lost HKD 2000. I quickly waved at my colleagues who were heading to the airport and they thought i was saying goodbye. However i did managed to stop them to rob them of their last dollar.

Monday was worst. You wouldn't believe the amount of bad luck i carried in me. I got pickpocketed of another HKD 900 after i spent only 100 for lunch. I didn't quite had mood for the rest of the trip until i bought myself some stuffs which included a wallet to keep my monies organised. I left for the airport early cuz i had no more money to shop and i probably maxed out my credit card by then.

And you think my bad luck should have ran out by now. Nope it didn't. I bought this gorgeous pair of shoes, wasn't cheap. Got home, realised both sides were of different sizes and i couldn't fit my right leg in at all. Now i've got to send it back to Hong Kong and hopefully my colleague can find the shady shop and hope that she could change it for me.

All in all, i still enjoyed my trip. I was glad at least i came home safe and sound. Money is going to be the last issue to bother me. I may be poor but i do not wanna stay unhappy as well. I'm looking forward to my next Hong Kong trip already.