Almost Here

When a purpose is no longer present, the game resets and life reshuffles. Looking at goals previously forsaken due to some setbacks, the process of rethinking begins. Goals are set once again but the arena changes. Getting out of this country may give the whole picture a clearer view and changes the focus spot. Having a brand new aim might being life to greater heights. If that is what that will last, there's no reason why that position shouldn't have a spot for me. Other things in life can wait I suppose...

Keeping all options open, there's a chance I might not leave the border but every chance I have to leave this place for a while, I might grab it in a heartbeat given the right settings. The daily reminder of what things would have been can be torturous. Going out to just do it might solve all issues. The main question is the future of Kokoro, the machine that's of so much value to me but none to others. It was the topic of how future would be like with the little house and the little car and Kokoro being that little car. To let go of such memories is undesirable but necessary. To press on will only smear the nice make up that's put on to beautify the face.

The temptation of a faster moving city is extremely tempting. The pending stress is only encouraging to put all of the mind and the soul into carving a new block. The rest of life will have to wait. Staring at pictures of bliss and happiness, it feels almost like a joke that we actually built those sandcastles that we knew that was too far away from concrete. No amount of desire and perseverance seems to be helping. I wish I could change the world but my hands are too small. If they can't even change the arc of my mouth, they can't change a mind. There's very little left to what one can do...

I would change the world
If I had a chance
Oh won't you let me
Treat me like a child
Throw your arms around me
Oh please protect me