Today is a brand new start.
Still haven't figured out if it's a good thing. I'm no longer doing in-house legal recruitment which means all these months of business development has gone down the drain. Ironically, since I found out about the move since last night, I have got at least 3 new clients emailing me on their recruitment needs and I'd have to pass them on. I spent all my billable time on precious business development and now, I'll have to give it all up my new assignments and all my clients.
Oh well, the consolation being that I do not have to work with "Elitist" again but the negative side, I'm sort of being pigeon-holed to do private practice in Singapore. The market here is so small and will be very limiting. I guess I just have to be positive and think that it's a better team that I'm going to be working with and I will probably end up learning alot more from DCM to project finance.
As some of you may know, the past couple of weeks had been tragically pressurising for me which make me feel terrible about myself. Just pray that that these will be over very soon although my car buying plans will have to wait...
I'm too stressed up to be typing anything that makes any sense.
Sigh... Wish me luck...
Friday, August 31, 2007
Thursday, August 30, 2007
FMCG - Fucking Miserly Crazy Goons
Just came back for a meeting, sneaking in a short entry before I shoot off to yet another meeting. The meeting earlier was a total disaster. The client's a very well-known brand and I almost got someone in there. They are so freaking stingy, giving me ridiculous budgets to work with. Some girl was even willing to take a massive paycut to get in there but her only condition is to start later so that she can get her bigga betta bonus then leave. They didn't want her after that. WTF! I will never ever be able to find someone of that level for that miserly pay. I'm not upset because of that. I'm in no condition to talk about that. Just feel like the world is crumbling down on me and I just want to burst into tears. I feel discriminated against. Alright, take a deep breath and to the next meeting I go...
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Lean On Me
Refusing to succumb to dormicum, I had another night of tossing and turning. Mindless thoughts aside, I was freakin' tired and when the mind wants to sleep but the body doesn't, it becomes an evil cycle of tossing from the left to right, from the front to the back. Insomnia is a devil who haunts me when I least needed it.
Just before I went out for lunch, I checked my phone and found a horrendous number of missed calls. Of which, 4 were unknown, 6 were repeated so I happily thought I've only got 2 calls to return. It turned out to be 2 x 30 mins calls so while trembling with hunger, I had to fake the usual cheery voice and try to finish the calls nicely. To top it all, they were all fruitless calls.
To Meiren Biaojie, I love you and you know I'm always here to make you a drink. I'm just a phonecall away and I will make it a point to spend more time with you girls. Mahjong is always welcomed but you know very well why I'm avoiding spending too much time at your place. I'll rent a space on your bed when you move out and hope the house search ends soon. I need to move out very soon as well. You've seen it for yourself how my Mom intrudes into my privacy last night. But the property prices just puts me off. Having said that, I'm just glad I have you to grumble to when Mom gets on my nerves.
And when I see you then I know it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know you will be there with me
I'll never leave you...
Just need to get closer, closer,
Lean on me now,
Lean on me now,
closer, closer,
Lean on me now,
Lean on me now.
Just before I went out for lunch, I checked my phone and found a horrendous number of missed calls. Of which, 4 were unknown, 6 were repeated so I happily thought I've only got 2 calls to return. It turned out to be 2 x 30 mins calls so while trembling with hunger, I had to fake the usual cheery voice and try to finish the calls nicely. To top it all, they were all fruitless calls.
To Meiren Biaojie, I love you and you know I'm always here to make you a drink. I'm just a phonecall away and I will make it a point to spend more time with you girls. Mahjong is always welcomed but you know very well why I'm avoiding spending too much time at your place. I'll rent a space on your bed when you move out and hope the house search ends soon. I need to move out very soon as well. You've seen it for yourself how my Mom intrudes into my privacy last night. But the property prices just puts me off. Having said that, I'm just glad I have you to grumble to when Mom gets on my nerves.
And when I see you then I know it will be next to me
And when I need you then I know you will be there with me
I'll never leave you...
Just need to get closer, closer,
Lean on me now,
Lean on me now,
closer, closer,
Lean on me now,
Lean on me now.
Everything. So la la la la la la la
For the first time in the past months since the Chinese New Year craze, we finally sat down for some girly mahjong. These times with my two sweetest nieces are always wonderful and full of crazy moments. We sing, we laugh and I love them to bits even though they win all my money all the time. I don't always lose and take today for example, I won big but the only thing, we weren't playing real money. "Mei Mei" got to be really lucky that we were just playing mahjong to pass time or she'd have lost her year's pocket money. All in all, it's good and healthy fun. I had a good laugh.
On an entirely separate note, "UHU Glue's BF" was telling me that he's so sick and tired and was planning to come back home. If he had came back from LA a couple of years back, things would have been very different. I'm glad he actually moved to the east and experienced it for himself how tough New York actually is. The main problem: His girlfriend is going to remain in New York and let's face it, how many of these long distance relationship actually worked. He's not very keen on that thought either. But if you ask me, I think it's about time he makes his way back. As much as he argues with his Dad all the time, he's still his parents' baby and even if he refuses to believe, they love him loads. He's got the loveliest parents in the world and he doesn't even know that. Life will definitely be tougher. Not so much the massive paycut but to start life anew, starting his own business and finding a new mate. Considering most of our friends are everywhere except home, I can foresee I'd be accompanying him for dinners all the time, a luxury I've missed out all these years. For very selfish reasons, I'd want him to come back but then again, I never had time for him when he's around. He's definitely my best friend for now and you know that by looking at my phone bill.
The next two weeks to come, I'd go into this frantic state of going in and out of tightly scheduled meetings. The amount of business development I'll have to do and the number of meetings lined up... oooh, just insane. Weirdly, I'm loving this. After a hard day's work, you'd actually find a wider smile on my face than a day of doing nothing.
Just got an email that I was dreading to open... My life is falling apart yet again. Part of the job's emotional roller coaster ride. If i ever die of a heart attack one day, do not doubt, it's part of my job.
You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.
And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
On an entirely separate note, "UHU Glue's BF" was telling me that he's so sick and tired and was planning to come back home. If he had came back from LA a couple of years back, things would have been very different. I'm glad he actually moved to the east and experienced it for himself how tough New York actually is. The main problem: His girlfriend is going to remain in New York and let's face it, how many of these long distance relationship actually worked. He's not very keen on that thought either. But if you ask me, I think it's about time he makes his way back. As much as he argues with his Dad all the time, he's still his parents' baby and even if he refuses to believe, they love him loads. He's got the loveliest parents in the world and he doesn't even know that. Life will definitely be tougher. Not so much the massive paycut but to start life anew, starting his own business and finding a new mate. Considering most of our friends are everywhere except home, I can foresee I'd be accompanying him for dinners all the time, a luxury I've missed out all these years. For very selfish reasons, I'd want him to come back but then again, I never had time for him when he's around. He's definitely my best friend for now and you know that by looking at my phone bill.
The next two weeks to come, I'd go into this frantic state of going in and out of tightly scheduled meetings. The amount of business development I'll have to do and the number of meetings lined up... oooh, just insane. Weirdly, I'm loving this. After a hard day's work, you'd actually find a wider smile on my face than a day of doing nothing.
Just got an email that I was dreading to open... My life is falling apart yet again. Part of the job's emotional roller coaster ride. If i ever die of a heart attack one day, do not doubt, it's part of my job.
You're a falling star, You're the get away car.
You're the line in the sand when I go too far.
You're the swimming pool, on an August day.
And you're the perfect thing to say.
And you play it coy, but it's kinda cute.
Ah, When you smile at me you know exactly what you do.
Baby don't pretend, that you don't know it's true.
Cause you can see it when I look at you.
And in this crazy life, and through these crazy times
It's you, it's you, You make me sing.
You're every line, you're every word, you're everything.
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
So, La, La, La, La, La, La, La
Monday, August 27, 2007
Infatuation?
The first infatuation I experienced dates back to more than 20 years ago. As I grew up, I slowly got used to the fact that these boys whom I was secretly in love with, never quite took a second look at me. As time passed, I've learnt through the hard way that guys you fall will never ever like you and you ended up with a truckload of boys trailing behind you whom you'll never take a second look at them. Immediate retribution. The rest of our lives is spent looking for someone who feels the same about how you feel for him.
I can still remember getting rejected when I was 13 when the stupid blind guy fell for this unattractive pretentious girl. To be fair, I've never quite attracted boys because I was one of the boys. My ex-classmates still calls me affectionately, "eh brudder". Those ninnies, never quite looked at me as a girl. My last memorable crush was for this extremely cute guy. It was because of him, I was really interested in roller-hockey once. I've never gone up to chat him up, stupidly for fear of rejection. Last year, I stepped into this inline skate shop in Katong wanting to check out some blades and this cute guy turned over and asked, "can i help you?". It was him. I couldn't believe my eyes and I swore I blushed instantly. So I pretended that I couldn't remember his name but I knew exactly who he was. Even after almost a decade, I was still pretty much a coward. All that went through my mind was, "I'm sure he has a girlfriend. He'll never like me." If only I had a bit more self-confidence, I might just asked him out for a drink. Then again, after all these years, I should at least have learnt the lesson that a girl should never ask a guy out. Men are born to be hunters. If you deliver food to their mouth, they will choose not to eat it.
It's amazing how some things never change no matter how much we've gone through learning those ridiculous lessons the worst way. The heart still beats in the oddest rhythm. The fear of rejection is worst than going hungry for 30 days. To be able to see that person would probably make your day. Eye-candy or not. But as we age, our mindsets have changed by leaps and bounds as time passes. We become more protective of our fragile selves and we form a natural locus around us which prevented people from getting too close. More often than not, we're just afraid to get hurt yet again. We stay far away not wanting to get too close only to find ourselves heading home immediately to hide under our blankets and wonder when we'd see that face again. You were wondering how perfect life would be if you could just spend the whole night having a chat with that special someone talking about things that would change the world or things that might not even move an ant.
We wouldn't and couldn't try. Jaded and afraid. Everything is so near yet so far. A hug would suffice but it's all a figment of the imagination. So surreal.
Maybe we're just getting too old for such games. We never really feel the same infatuation we did when we were kiddos. We just know if it's right or not. Can be so wrong but we're all too afraid to get hurt.
I can still remember getting rejected when I was 13 when the stupid blind guy fell for this unattractive pretentious girl. To be fair, I've never quite attracted boys because I was one of the boys. My ex-classmates still calls me affectionately, "eh brudder". Those ninnies, never quite looked at me as a girl. My last memorable crush was for this extremely cute guy. It was because of him, I was really interested in roller-hockey once. I've never gone up to chat him up, stupidly for fear of rejection. Last year, I stepped into this inline skate shop in Katong wanting to check out some blades and this cute guy turned over and asked, "can i help you?". It was him. I couldn't believe my eyes and I swore I blushed instantly. So I pretended that I couldn't remember his name but I knew exactly who he was. Even after almost a decade, I was still pretty much a coward. All that went through my mind was, "I'm sure he has a girlfriend. He'll never like me." If only I had a bit more self-confidence, I might just asked him out for a drink. Then again, after all these years, I should at least have learnt the lesson that a girl should never ask a guy out. Men are born to be hunters. If you deliver food to their mouth, they will choose not to eat it.
It's amazing how some things never change no matter how much we've gone through learning those ridiculous lessons the worst way. The heart still beats in the oddest rhythm. The fear of rejection is worst than going hungry for 30 days. To be able to see that person would probably make your day. Eye-candy or not. But as we age, our mindsets have changed by leaps and bounds as time passes. We become more protective of our fragile selves and we form a natural locus around us which prevented people from getting too close. More often than not, we're just afraid to get hurt yet again. We stay far away not wanting to get too close only to find ourselves heading home immediately to hide under our blankets and wonder when we'd see that face again. You were wondering how perfect life would be if you could just spend the whole night having a chat with that special someone talking about things that would change the world or things that might not even move an ant.
We wouldn't and couldn't try. Jaded and afraid. Everything is so near yet so far. A hug would suffice but it's all a figment of the imagination. So surreal.
Maybe we're just getting too old for such games. We never really feel the same infatuation we did when we were kiddos. We just know if it's right or not. Can be so wrong but we're all too afraid to get hurt.
White Lies Are Lies Too
Between people, if there's no honesty, how do you expect to go on as friends, lovers or colleagues. At the very least, the relationship will never be genuine. For me, it's pretty obvious when it's not genuine from the inside because it's shown all over through my actions. I can't hide what I'm not comfortable with. Some think I should try to be nicer and be very "plastic". I can't, simply can't. What you see if what you get. Take it or fucking leave it.
People around me lie and I have a brilliant ability to read between lines and see through them. Puzzles me sometimes and it is extremely frustrating to know that some people are lying but I'm not able to expose them. Even though some are white lies and they mean no harm, it still hurts me a great deal especially when these people mean something to me. In my line of work, white lies are unavoidable. Some people try to paint a nice picture to get what they want. Other go into interviews and backstab the recruiter. To be fair, this is one example out of hundreds of others who are excellent. If there's something wrong with me, just tell me. There's no need to make a huge detour and try to put it nicely. That is still a lie. If you do not have time for me, there's no need for an excuse. If you're not actively looking, just say so. If you're not interested in the package, tell me. It's my job.
The real pain comes when people you've appreciated having around you lie, even white lies. White lies are not harmless, they are lies. A half truth is in fact, a whole lie. A human being naked and a human being all nicely dressed, one who's evil or one who's angelic, is still a human being. Having said that, I'm guilty of lies as well. We not only lie to get what we want, we lie habitually.
From Rihanna's Unfaithful,
I say I won't be long,
Just hanging with the girls,
A lie i didn't have to tell.
Because we both know,
Where I'm about to go,
And we know it very well.
Simple things that doesn't need a lie to cover up, we still do it anyway. I stress I avoid lies and I do not appreciate them. If you think you're getting away with lies, you're not. I can tell. I know you're fucking lying. Even through your eyes, a sentence, a sms, an email or a carefully planned conversation, I know you're fucking lying and I do not appreciate it at all.
I'm so tired of pretentious people. Stop all your fucking lies.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything. Mark Twain
People around me lie and I have a brilliant ability to read between lines and see through them. Puzzles me sometimes and it is extremely frustrating to know that some people are lying but I'm not able to expose them. Even though some are white lies and they mean no harm, it still hurts me a great deal especially when these people mean something to me. In my line of work, white lies are unavoidable. Some people try to paint a nice picture to get what they want. Other go into interviews and backstab the recruiter. To be fair, this is one example out of hundreds of others who are excellent. If there's something wrong with me, just tell me. There's no need to make a huge detour and try to put it nicely. That is still a lie. If you do not have time for me, there's no need for an excuse. If you're not actively looking, just say so. If you're not interested in the package, tell me. It's my job.
The real pain comes when people you've appreciated having around you lie, even white lies. White lies are not harmless, they are lies. A half truth is in fact, a whole lie. A human being naked and a human being all nicely dressed, one who's evil or one who's angelic, is still a human being. Having said that, I'm guilty of lies as well. We not only lie to get what we want, we lie habitually.
From Rihanna's Unfaithful,
I say I won't be long,
Just hanging with the girls,
A lie i didn't have to tell.
Because we both know,
Where I'm about to go,
And we know it very well.
Simple things that doesn't need a lie to cover up, we still do it anyway. I stress I avoid lies and I do not appreciate them. If you think you're getting away with lies, you're not. I can tell. I know you're fucking lying. Even through your eyes, a sentence, a sms, an email or a carefully planned conversation, I know you're fucking lying and I do not appreciate it at all.
I'm so tired of pretentious people. Stop all your fucking lies.
If you tell the truth you don't have to remember anything. Mark Twain
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Brink of Insanity
Wakeboarding yesterday was disastrous and I blame it all on the 14 hours of drinking on Friday. Think I'm better at blaming other things or people than admitting that I'm a bloody rookie. Alright, I'm still a rookie. "Pretty Mom" commented on my dark circles and eye bags when I went over for dinner and to do some catching up last night so I slept through Sunday and caught up on the much needed rest. The week had been hectic and there's just so much going through my mind. Well rested, I'm all ready for a hard week ahead... Not!
Did a fair amount of shopping today and considering that I'm still paying for Tiger's medical (Earlier this year, he got really sick and by spending an incredibale amount of money, he's lying here beside me snuggling away which if you've been reading my blog, you will know. At the end of the day, all worth it.), I think I have got to stop this insanity. Desperately trying to keep my mind occupied, I've been fiddling with my iTunes when I should be packing up my room and not sit here, blogging away, poking into the next piece of Royce chocolate.
If anyone of you are willing to entertain me, I have a question on dresses. As some of you may know, I had to attend this black tie event some time ago. Refusing to pay a ridiculous amount for a dress which I'll never wear again, I bought a simple black dress and loved it. Since my office doesn't allow casual Friday except for the first Friday of the month, I've been trying to find dresses which I can wear for work on Fridays, formal yet good enough for Friday nights out. Needless to say, it has got to look good AND make me look good. If you know of anywhere apart from my usual favourites at Tangs or Flowers on the Attic, please let me know. So much for wanting to reduce spending...
Did a fair amount of shopping today and considering that I'm still paying for Tiger's medical (Earlier this year, he got really sick and by spending an incredibale amount of money, he's lying here beside me snuggling away which if you've been reading my blog, you will know. At the end of the day, all worth it.), I think I have got to stop this insanity. Desperately trying to keep my mind occupied, I've been fiddling with my iTunes when I should be packing up my room and not sit here, blogging away, poking into the next piece of Royce chocolate.
If anyone of you are willing to entertain me, I have a question on dresses. As some of you may know, I had to attend this black tie event some time ago. Refusing to pay a ridiculous amount for a dress which I'll never wear again, I bought a simple black dress and loved it. Since my office doesn't allow casual Friday except for the first Friday of the month, I've been trying to find dresses which I can wear for work on Fridays, formal yet good enough for Friday nights out. Needless to say, it has got to look good AND make me look good. If you know of anywhere apart from my usual favourites at Tangs or Flowers on the Attic, please let me know. So much for wanting to reduce spending...
Friday, August 24, 2007
Another Boring Yet Alcohol Filled Day
Can't believe I'm back in the office finishing up bits of work after a quick drink at Post Bar AND I actually turned down an invitation to join the 5 o'clock club. (The 5 o'clock club is made up most of the guys from all over the world working on the same floor, they made it a point to leave by 5 on Friday for drinks and I'm always working too late and never got to join them. How depressing.) Well, "Shrek" is in town and I thought it's best that I spend sometime with the rest, hoping that would remind why I actually love being in this place. Right now, I'm just waiting for the right time to give my candidate a call before I leave for dinner and possibly more alcohol. Too much alcohol for one day I guess, considering lunch today was accompanied by some nice red wine. Have I told you guys, drinking is like part of the job? It all started with "Babooshka Mom". From her nickname you should be able to guess she's never too far from her vodkas and since July 2006, I've been drinking on a regular basis like a semi-alcoholic. To top it all, I'm actually allergic to alcohol so I'm scratching myself away but still yearning for more. The truth is, I really enjoy this. Only thing, I used to love it better when "DGJ", "Babooshka Mom" & "AJD" was around. Guess things are just different now.
Primly dressed in white blouse and black suit, "Ade-lady" and myself head off for our corporate photo shoot before lunch when it was pouring buckets. You tend to hate these weather when you have hair that frizzes whenever they get wet especially when you need to look good. Thankfully we had our brollies and weren't wet but I must say, the hair was horrendous, curling in every other direction apart from where it should be. It was early so we hung around for a good cuppa before heading back to get our pictures taken. Surprisingly, it was really quick. All of 20 mins for the both of us and we're done. We left the place with the "are you sure" look on our face but well, he's the professional. The photographer would probably have to spend the entire weekend trying to photoshop the pictures. He'd better do something to make my face look smaller and prettier. That's alot of work!
We had a girls day out for lunch so all 3 us left the boys in the office and headed out like a scene off Charlie's Angels. As usual, we went up to top of UOB for some decent Chinese. We're so predictable - Every lunch was either over at Town restaurant or at Marmalade Pantry or top of the plaza. It was good time talking about our personal lives and how disruptive some people are. Then again, I tend to keep quite a bit to myself and gave very general briefs of my current condition.
Right now, my fingers are all crossed hoping for good weather for wakeboarding tomorrow and that my candidate pass with flying colours tomorrow.
I know I haven't blogging on really interesting stuffs nowadays. My mind's been bogged down with alot of stuffs but well, it's still my blog so I get to blog on these mundane stuffs. Just bear with me.
Oh an email I got from Comedy Boss...
Check out reason for sale of her car!
-----Original Message-----
From: XXX
Sent: 20 August 2007 19:29
To: XXXX
Subject: FW: hi
Go to www.2012products.co.uk for a picture of me! - not v good as taken far
too early in the day but gives you an idea of what I look like currently!!!
My claustrophobic MINI incident was not unfounded.
I see the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon
Primly dressed in white blouse and black suit, "Ade-lady" and myself head off for our corporate photo shoot before lunch when it was pouring buckets. You tend to hate these weather when you have hair that frizzes whenever they get wet especially when you need to look good. Thankfully we had our brollies and weren't wet but I must say, the hair was horrendous, curling in every other direction apart from where it should be. It was early so we hung around for a good cuppa before heading back to get our pictures taken. Surprisingly, it was really quick. All of 20 mins for the both of us and we're done. We left the place with the "are you sure" look on our face but well, he's the professional. The photographer would probably have to spend the entire weekend trying to photoshop the pictures. He'd better do something to make my face look smaller and prettier. That's alot of work!
We had a girls day out for lunch so all 3 us left the boys in the office and headed out like a scene off Charlie's Angels. As usual, we went up to top of UOB for some decent Chinese. We're so predictable - Every lunch was either over at Town restaurant or at Marmalade Pantry or top of the plaza. It was good time talking about our personal lives and how disruptive some people are. Then again, I tend to keep quite a bit to myself and gave very general briefs of my current condition.
Right now, my fingers are all crossed hoping for good weather for wakeboarding tomorrow and that my candidate pass with flying colours tomorrow.
I know I haven't blogging on really interesting stuffs nowadays. My mind's been bogged down with alot of stuffs but well, it's still my blog so I get to blog on these mundane stuffs. Just bear with me.
Oh an email I got from Comedy Boss...
Check out reason for sale of her car!
-----Original Message-----
From: XXX
Sent: 20 August 2007 19:29
To: XXXX
Subject: FW: hi
Go to www.2012products.co.uk for a picture of me! - not v good as taken far
too early in the day but gives you an idea of what I look like currently!!!
My claustrophobic MINI incident was not unfounded.
I see the same side of the moon
That we'll be looking on when the world turns blue
And know that time and space can't come between me and you
We share the same side of the moon
And though you'll never see all the tears shine through
I know I can't be that far from you
If we're both looking on the same side of the moon
Hmmm... Who Shall I Marry?
One nutter really sympathised with my plight and is asking me to marry him. I thought it's really funny. I was just talking to "UHU Glue's BF" the other day and he told me that if i'm left on the shelf by 35, he'd marry me. Hey, do i look like nobody wants me? Well, maybe but what a consolation to know that there are people out there who wants to marry me. It's a good deal here. I can cook and clean! I'm going nuts too. About time to sleep and not get dark circles for the photoshoot tomorrow. Thanks all for making me feel better. "Such a feeling's coming over me. There is wonder in 'most everything I see..."
Thursday, August 23, 2007
Time For Good Byes?
I wrote a very long blog on how much I miss the old office but I deleted it all. I reckon that would get me into more trouble that I already gotten myself into today. All I want to do now is to hide under my comforter and have a good cry.
To top it all, a candidate who is in the final stage suddenly pulled a disappearing act and withdrew from the process. This is what we call, putting money in your pocket and taking away from you.
End of the day, it boils down to the people around you. When you wake up in the morning and dread going to work, you know...
It's about time to go...
To top it all, a candidate who is in the final stage suddenly pulled a disappearing act and withdrew from the process. This is what we call, putting money in your pocket and taking away from you.
End of the day, it boils down to the people around you. When you wake up in the morning and dread going to work, you know...
It's about time to go...
Sick and Totally Fucked Up
Drinks tonight is canceled and postponed to an unknown date. Happens all the time. At least Villa Bali is still in the plans for a good Friday night out. But considering the photo shoot for our corporate profile is scheduled tomorrow, I'm going to be running around in a suit. The ideal Friday dress should like a sweet black demure dress, not looking like a litigation lawyer. Oh heck, even in t-shirt & shorts with my hair all over the place flushing after a good gym session, some associate from a top law firm still bothered to speak to me so I reckon, the white shirt and black skirt shouldn't matter that much.
Down with upper respiratory tract infection for the past two days, I'm finally back at work today. Still stressed up and the body ache is torturing me. My throat seems to get worse and I can barely speak this morning.
Argh... Everything's fucked up. Was pulled out for a chat today. Going to plant myself into nothing but work from now on. Oh fuck, I'll try.
Can I cry?
Down with upper respiratory tract infection for the past two days, I'm finally back at work today. Still stressed up and the body ache is torturing me. My throat seems to get worse and I can barely speak this morning.
Argh... Everything's fucked up. Was pulled out for a chat today. Going to plant myself into nothing but work from now on. Oh fuck, I'll try.
Can I cry?
Wednesday, August 22, 2007
New York New York...
Alas, I had my steamboat today. It's an unsaid rule - "Monkey" will suggest going for steamboat at least once a week. (There was once I even had MSG attack due to steamboat but that's another story.) It's like a catchup session. "ZCM" and "Monkey" will be going Lombok next month and Egypt end of the year and me, probably stuck behind my office desk, stressed over work and pulling out all my hair. "ZCM" can't make it for the October Prague trip so "Monkey" asked if I'd like to go. I'm tempted. Should I? Not going to be easy bunking in with someone notorious for his incredible snoring known to wake up people staying next door. Well, if he can tahan my teeth grinding...
Prague in autumn is going to be beautiful... Prague castle, the dancing house, Charles Bridge... Could have been so romantic but with "Monkey"??? Well, at least he's an excellent photographer! 14 hours of flight is not the only factor deterring me. Should I go?
I have so much going through my mind right now, I can bearly function. Had a very long chat with "UHU Glue's BF" (I think I'm spending so much on long distance calls, it's about time you dump New York and come home!), he never fails to be very reassuring. He's so going to kill me that I'm considering Prague, not New York.
To UHU Glue's BF - "If I'm not going Prague, I will try to plan a trip to New York around Christmas. Make sure UHU Glue isn't gonna murder me. You can move in with her and I'll take over your apartment."
Not sounding very coherent today. Travel or not, some things need to be sorted with urgency and I will do just that.
I do not appreciate people stealing information from me regardless of your intentions. This only reminds me of a failed relationship I had for 6 years of my prime. Yes, the "Munchausen Syndrome Man". You can never imagine how hard those times were to have a boyfriend who pries into your privacy and threatens to kill your family. Now that I'm out of it, I have to learn to be stronger and protect myself. I don't think I can take any more rubbish. Now I'm feeling freaking vulnerable. It feels like if anyone were to tap on my shoulder, I'll yell "Go Away!" and hide under my blanket to have a good cry. Sick and tired. I need to cry...
Prague in autumn is going to be beautiful... Prague castle, the dancing house, Charles Bridge... Could have been so romantic but with "Monkey"??? Well, at least he's an excellent photographer! 14 hours of flight is not the only factor deterring me. Should I go?
I have so much going through my mind right now, I can bearly function. Had a very long chat with "UHU Glue's BF" (I think I'm spending so much on long distance calls, it's about time you dump New York and come home!), he never fails to be very reassuring. He's so going to kill me that I'm considering Prague, not New York.
To UHU Glue's BF - "If I'm not going Prague, I will try to plan a trip to New York around Christmas. Make sure UHU Glue isn't gonna murder me. You can move in with her and I'll take over your apartment."
Not sounding very coherent today. Travel or not, some things need to be sorted with urgency and I will do just that.
I do not appreciate people stealing information from me regardless of your intentions. This only reminds me of a failed relationship I had for 6 years of my prime. Yes, the "Munchausen Syndrome Man". You can never imagine how hard those times were to have a boyfriend who pries into your privacy and threatens to kill your family. Now that I'm out of it, I have to learn to be stronger and protect myself. I don't think I can take any more rubbish. Now I'm feeling freaking vulnerable. It feels like if anyone were to tap on my shoulder, I'll yell "Go Away!" and hide under my blanket to have a good cry. Sick and tired. I need to cry...
Tuesday, August 21, 2007
Show Me The Money
Saw this article on "Barrister-in-making's" blog and I felt the need to clarify the situation. I stare at these numbers everyday so even if you don't trust me, trust my professional knowledge.
Our junior lawyers may be starting at SGD4000 a month but bear in mind, these jokers get 3-8 months of bonuses every year which means that their annual total remuneration is way more than SGD4000 x 12 months + 1 month AWS which is essentially your 13th month bonus. An average of 6 months is considered conservative for average performers. To be fair, I have seen more 8 months bonus than 3. If you're getting 3 months, you gotta be really crap and not doing much work. Even then, I understand that this is still way lower than Hong Kong and London.
Tax. Mind you, the tax in Singapore is about say 18%(i'm not sure of the exact number though) for the top bracket but in London, you're paying about double that. The hours you're clocking is probably much more as well. Most local law firms think 2000 - 2500 is normal but then if you're a fee-earner in the Magic Circle firms, you're clocking ALOT more. US firms in the UK does pay alot more but the demands are proportionate.
Last year, a top local law firm led the pay increment for all its lawyers (about 20%). All other law firms of the same level followed suit. At the same time, please do not be blinded by how they mark the NQ or 1 year PQE. At about 2 years PQE, you're probably looking at 6-7k which is great increment for 2 years of slaving and of course, the experience. If you look at the Magic Circle fee-earners in Singapore, they may be paid by UK rates, taxes and even CPF (both employer's and employee's) paid for by the firm.
So do not be jealous of our Hong Kong counterparts. They're billing the numbers that they are getting as well. The market is different and so will the work be.
Most of these "exported" lawyers look to come back home some day and more often than not, they will need to face the massive pay cut and enter the dilemma of "Should I take a cut and come home but I miss Laksa and Mom".
There are of course pros and cons you'd have to weigh. To solve the problem of a shortage of lawyers in Singapore, admission to the bar should be extended to students from more universities from all over the world. Face it, if you can pass the PLC here, you will be in a position to know the Singapore legal system alot better and with maybe longer pupillage, some of these people can make good lawyers as well. Just because you've graduated from NUS Law School shouldn't give these people immediate priority. look at our poor "Barrister-in-making", slogging his ass off in cold and lonely Hobart just because they don't recognise him here and he's got to get called in Oz first before he can be seen on par with his peers back home. I could have done my bar with "King's Cross" and be begging from door to door for a training contract. Unfortunately, an Asian girl in a pro white male environment is going to find it really tough and let's not forget the cost involved. Well, that's another story altogether. All in all, Singapore should review how to get our lawyers called and a more stringent PLC could just do the job.
Pay lawyers more to keep them: Chief Justice
By Pearl Forss, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 18 August 2007 2259 hrs
Pay lawyers more to keep them: Chief Justice
SINGAPORE: More young lawyers are switching careers, citing long hours, unrewarding pay and stress as reasons.
This causes a shortage of lawyers, and as the economy booms and the demand for law services goes up, the problem is becoming more acute.
How to address this problem?
"Pay them well," said Chief Justice Chan Sek Keong, in his address to law students at the inaugural Singapore Legal Forum on Saturday.
"Our young lawyers enjoy a degree of professional and social freedom and mobility which lawyers of my generation have never experienced. Perhaps the solution is in the old fashion but still fashionable way of using carrots without the stick since the latter doesn't work. Pay them well. Greed works most of the time, even for the large majority of people in affluent societies," he said.
In recent years, even the best-paying firms in Singapore are seeing their young lawyers jumping ship to Hong Kong, where salaries for junior lawyers start at about S$11,650 a month.
In contrast, the big firms in Singapore pay junior lawyers just over $4,000.
A second law school has been established at the Singapore Management University.
Also, the NUS Law Faculty has increased its intake and firms are now allowed to hire foreign lawyers.
But the shortage has not eased yet.
Another issue of concern addressed at the Legal Forum is how to make the law more accessible to the public.
Laws may be available online but the language in which it is written makes it difficult for the layman to understand it.
So the Chief Justice said that he would ask the Law Academy's publishing committee to study the feasibility of publishing simplified law books.
While access to the law is important, access to justice is even more so.
This need will be provided by lawyers who do pro bono work, that is providing service free of charge.
But such services are currently confined to Community Court cases, and this year, more convicted offenders are appearing in High Court appeals without lawyers.
In his speech, the Chief Justice also addressed the issue of restoring confidence in the law profession, particularly after the high-profile case of lawyer David Rasif who fled with more than $12 million in clients' monies.
"We must be more discerning about what we read in the media. The facts do not suggest any loss of confidence in the legal profession," said the Chief Justice.
"On the contrary, our large and medium law firms are generally held in high regard in Singapore and in the region. All the ethical and professional lapses that I have come across in my 40 years in the law have emanated from small law firms. It's very unfortunate," he added.
Although only a small minority of lawyers in these firms have committed breach of trust, the Chief Justice stressed that all law students must be taught the importance of ethical values.
The forum was organised by the UK Singapore Law Students Society. - CNA/ir
Our junior lawyers may be starting at SGD4000 a month but bear in mind, these jokers get 3-8 months of bonuses every year which means that their annual total remuneration is way more than SGD4000 x 12 months + 1 month AWS which is essentially your 13th month bonus. An average of 6 months is considered conservative for average performers. To be fair, I have seen more 8 months bonus than 3. If you're getting 3 months, you gotta be really crap and not doing much work. Even then, I understand that this is still way lower than Hong Kong and London.
Tax. Mind you, the tax in Singapore is about say 18%(i'm not sure of the exact number though) for the top bracket but in London, you're paying about double that. The hours you're clocking is probably much more as well. Most local law firms think 2000 - 2500 is normal but then if you're a fee-earner in the Magic Circle firms, you're clocking ALOT more. US firms in the UK does pay alot more but the demands are proportionate.
Last year, a top local law firm led the pay increment for all its lawyers (about 20%). All other law firms of the same level followed suit. At the same time, please do not be blinded by how they mark the NQ or 1 year PQE. At about 2 years PQE, you're probably looking at 6-7k which is great increment for 2 years of slaving and of course, the experience. If you look at the Magic Circle fee-earners in Singapore, they may be paid by UK rates, taxes and even CPF (both employer's and employee's) paid for by the firm.
So do not be jealous of our Hong Kong counterparts. They're billing the numbers that they are getting as well. The market is different and so will the work be.
Most of these "exported" lawyers look to come back home some day and more often than not, they will need to face the massive pay cut and enter the dilemma of "Should I take a cut and come home but I miss Laksa and Mom".
There are of course pros and cons you'd have to weigh. To solve the problem of a shortage of lawyers in Singapore, admission to the bar should be extended to students from more universities from all over the world. Face it, if you can pass the PLC here, you will be in a position to know the Singapore legal system alot better and with maybe longer pupillage, some of these people can make good lawyers as well. Just because you've graduated from NUS Law School shouldn't give these people immediate priority. look at our poor "Barrister-in-making", slogging his ass off in cold and lonely Hobart just because they don't recognise him here and he's got to get called in Oz first before he can be seen on par with his peers back home. I could have done my bar with "King's Cross" and be begging from door to door for a training contract. Unfortunately, an Asian girl in a pro white male environment is going to find it really tough and let's not forget the cost involved. Well, that's another story altogether. All in all, Singapore should review how to get our lawyers called and a more stringent PLC could just do the job.
Pay lawyers more to keep them: Chief Justice
By Pearl Forss, Channel NewsAsia | Posted: 18 August 2007 2259 hrs
Pay lawyers more to keep them: Chief Justice
SINGAPORE: More young lawyers are switching careers, citing long hours, unrewarding pay and stress as reasons.
This causes a shortage of lawyers, and as the economy booms and the demand for law services goes up, the problem is becoming more acute.
How to address this problem?
"Pay them well," said Chief Justice Chan Sek Keong, in his address to law students at the inaugural Singapore Legal Forum on Saturday.
"Our young lawyers enjoy a degree of professional and social freedom and mobility which lawyers of my generation have never experienced. Perhaps the solution is in the old fashion but still fashionable way of using carrots without the stick since the latter doesn't work. Pay them well. Greed works most of the time, even for the large majority of people in affluent societies," he said.
In recent years, even the best-paying firms in Singapore are seeing their young lawyers jumping ship to Hong Kong, where salaries for junior lawyers start at about S$11,650 a month.
In contrast, the big firms in Singapore pay junior lawyers just over $4,000.
A second law school has been established at the Singapore Management University.
Also, the NUS Law Faculty has increased its intake and firms are now allowed to hire foreign lawyers.
But the shortage has not eased yet.
Another issue of concern addressed at the Legal Forum is how to make the law more accessible to the public.
Laws may be available online but the language in which it is written makes it difficult for the layman to understand it.
So the Chief Justice said that he would ask the Law Academy's publishing committee to study the feasibility of publishing simplified law books.
While access to the law is important, access to justice is even more so.
This need will be provided by lawyers who do pro bono work, that is providing service free of charge.
But such services are currently confined to Community Court cases, and this year, more convicted offenders are appearing in High Court appeals without lawyers.
In his speech, the Chief Justice also addressed the issue of restoring confidence in the law profession, particularly after the high-profile case of lawyer David Rasif who fled with more than $12 million in clients' monies.
"We must be more discerning about what we read in the media. The facts do not suggest any loss of confidence in the legal profession," said the Chief Justice.
"On the contrary, our large and medium law firms are generally held in high regard in Singapore and in the region. All the ethical and professional lapses that I have come across in my 40 years in the law have emanated from small law firms. It's very unfortunate," he added.
Although only a small minority of lawyers in these firms have committed breach of trust, the Chief Justice stressed that all law students must be taught the importance of ethical values.
The forum was organised by the UK Singapore Law Students Society. - CNA/ir
Long Hair vs Short Hair
Many were shocked when I cropped those tresses off some 2 months back. I've been having long hair since JC days and I had to muster some monumental courage to tell my hairdresser, "Just do it!". Since then, I've tried all different types of bobs which may not be the most flattering hair style since I've got a bagel-shaped face.
Whenever I'm down and out, I'd go get myself a haircut/massage/manicure in hope of making myself feel better. I chose the first option today and decided to tweak it a little. Nothing drastic, trimmed it a little, soften the heavy look and layered it to ease the pending growth. Yes, I'm trying to grow it again. Apparently, almost all my guy friends told me, short hair, uh huh, no, totally unfeminine. Some guy I went for dinner with ONCE and subsequently became a normal friend remarked, "Girls with short hair is just like girls without boobs, not so much a girl." Mind you, he probably went to the best university in Australia and was well, born and bred there so it's definitely not an Asian guy thing, let alone a Singaporean man point of view. Where do these people get the impression from but I have to agree, long hair does make me feel more sexy. But short hair makes me feel more in control, just how I want myself to feel in my job.
For now, I'll be stuck with hair neither long or short. Just hope that I get over the in between period quick and by then, I have this feeling I might like it short all over again. Little ironies in life.
Any suggestions? What do you guys think?
Whenever I'm down and out, I'd go get myself a haircut/massage/manicure in hope of making myself feel better. I chose the first option today and decided to tweak it a little. Nothing drastic, trimmed it a little, soften the heavy look and layered it to ease the pending growth. Yes, I'm trying to grow it again. Apparently, almost all my guy friends told me, short hair, uh huh, no, totally unfeminine. Some guy I went for dinner with ONCE and subsequently became a normal friend remarked, "Girls with short hair is just like girls without boobs, not so much a girl." Mind you, he probably went to the best university in Australia and was well, born and bred there so it's definitely not an Asian guy thing, let alone a Singaporean man point of view. Where do these people get the impression from but I have to agree, long hair does make me feel more sexy. But short hair makes me feel more in control, just how I want myself to feel in my job.
For now, I'll be stuck with hair neither long or short. Just hope that I get over the in between period quick and by then, I have this feeling I might like it short all over again. Little ironies in life.
Any suggestions? What do you guys think?
He's Just Not that Into You
To be lying here on bed, listening to "High Society", chatting on MSN must be the greatest thing I can imagine myself to be doing on a work day. But when you're sniffling like me coupled with unbearable body aches, it all doesn't seem that ideal anymore. In fact, I'm missing work and I actually long to be sitting in front of my desk, in the middle of the super open office (At work, our tables are all joined up so we can just holla at someone when we need to speak about anything but that means ZERO privacy. When you're pulling your hair off or even smiling to yourself, EVERYONE can see you.), calling up candidates and clients, working in a pile of mess. I have another day of MC tomorrow because my throat is looking very sore and the doctor thinks I really need some rest but I have this feeling I might be back in the office this time tomorrow.
I'm currently reading "he's just not that into you" by Greg Behrendt & Liz Tuccillo. Hilarious. If you like chick books, you should read it but do not read it like a bible. I know many girls do but always bear in mind, you're in control of your life, not a author who doesn't know your situation. Having said that, I have to agree that we girly have to ignore all the guys who fails to come to you and tries his million and one excuses to avoid a relationship because he's just not that into you. I tried out the polls on some of my guy friends and here's the conclusion:
- A serious and long term relationship started with the guy asking the girl out. Cliche but true.
- "a fear of intimacy" has never stopped guys from getting into a relationship
- guys never accidentally slept with anyone
- if the guy broke up with you, it's because he didn't want to go out with you anymore
- if the guy is serious and into you, he WILL ask you out
BR, I really want you to read this book but I do not want you to take this book like a Bible and believe everything it says. I know we've both gone through the "Why do men love bitches" but seriously, you have to be in control of your life. This book makes a good laugh and I know you will enjoy it. Will pass it to you next time I see you. (If you want, that is.)
I can't wait to finish this so I can move on to Jeremy Clarkson. Ah.
I'm currently reading "he's just not that into you" by Greg Behrendt & Liz Tuccillo. Hilarious. If you like chick books, you should read it but do not read it like a bible. I know many girls do but always bear in mind, you're in control of your life, not a author who doesn't know your situation. Having said that, I have to agree that we girly have to ignore all the guys who fails to come to you and tries his million and one excuses to avoid a relationship because he's just not that into you. I tried out the polls on some of my guy friends and here's the conclusion:
- A serious and long term relationship started with the guy asking the girl out. Cliche but true.
- "a fear of intimacy" has never stopped guys from getting into a relationship
- guys never accidentally slept with anyone
- if the guy broke up with you, it's because he didn't want to go out with you anymore
- if the guy is serious and into you, he WILL ask you out
BR, I really want you to read this book but I do not want you to take this book like a Bible and believe everything it says. I know we've both gone through the "Why do men love bitches" but seriously, you have to be in control of your life. This book makes a good laugh and I know you will enjoy it. Will pass it to you next time I see you. (If you want, that is.)
I can't wait to finish this so I can move on to Jeremy Clarkson. Ah.
Monday, August 20, 2007
Pretty Please
"UHU Glue's BF", are you coming back for Hari Raya, Deepavali or Christmas? I need to get one of the above. They don't carry these in Singapore so if you've got friends coming back, could you help me get it please?
Now girls, which is the better looking one? Guys will never be able to tell the difference.
I Want My Sunshine...
Waking up this morning to find my entire nasal cavity all clogged up while trying to put on something good to start a week. After reaching the office, only to find everyone else is late as well, I realised I forgot about my cuff links and I can't remember where I left it so I had to fold up these bloody dangly sleeves. Now that half the day is gone, I finally found my cuff links in my little treasure chest right beside me.
Spent my entire morning speaking to a client whose last name most people have difficulty pronouncing it and I have absolutely no intention of revealing that. He told me that there's something about me that he really liked and he suddenly went "Gotta be your Canadian streak". You see, he's Canadian, I'm not. I joked about maybe I've been shoving too much ice off the driveway and there's just too much salt in the hair. Remember my brains were probably half dead all clogged up by the mucus so it didn't occur to me that it was the least bit funny but he laugh and at one point, he couldn't breathe. I could have given him a heart attack without knowing. (I so can imagine "Barrister in Making" telling me about mens rea or rather, lack thereof.)
Was in the pantry this morning and because we are in a serviced office, we get all sorts of people from all over the world working around us. There's always this group of mid-30s guys who always spend excessive long time chatting away in the pantry. When it comes to activities, I'm like one of the boys which explains why I always get invites to after-work beer or weekend out at sea. Never been to anyone of these. Well, they are afterall guys and you don't have to think very hard to know what they want. This morning, as usual, I went to get my tea and one of guys, "Spongebob" screamed "hey, sexy legs". I was shell-shocked. I've never been called that and to be truthful, I felt flattered. After waking up to reality, I snubbed, "you mean sexy heels, thunderthighs?" I loved the next comment which I'm very proud to announce, he said, "sexy heels. very sexy legs". I could remarked naughtily, "so, my place or yours." I just blushed and thanked him and walked away. Argh, girls are such suckers for compliments knowing these boys need to be taught a lesson for being so mischievous. Having said that, they are a great bunch for some fun and alcohol and to set the record straight for the benefits of my nieces reading this, I have never gone home with guys casually and I will not do do, so do not try these. Such conversations are meant for aging aunties like me who's not hip enough to attend Gwen Stefani's concert! I'm so falling into your Mom's category, not that it's a bad thing but I still wanna feel young!!! Aiyoh, I actually wanted to go for the Ah Mei concert.
Anyway, went out for a walk during lunchtime to take a breather. Didn't know what to get, absolutely no appetite. I'm so sick and tired of Raffles Place, sitting around sniffling away trying to get as much sun within that 10 mins. Ended up shopping around and the prize: another pair of shoes which I doubt I'd wear it more than 3 times. Will post up some pictures.
"Coffee Punter" brought her little bubba in when I came back. He's so cute. Intending to get some pictures up tonight as well so keep watching this space. Er, refresh them occasionally.
Check this out... Beauty!!! All BMW M3 Sold Out in the UK
Back to work and banging my head on all Middle East Oil & Gas companies...
Spent my entire morning speaking to a client whose last name most people have difficulty pronouncing it and I have absolutely no intention of revealing that. He told me that there's something about me that he really liked and he suddenly went "Gotta be your Canadian streak". You see, he's Canadian, I'm not. I joked about maybe I've been shoving too much ice off the driveway and there's just too much salt in the hair. Remember my brains were probably half dead all clogged up by the mucus so it didn't occur to me that it was the least bit funny but he laugh and at one point, he couldn't breathe. I could have given him a heart attack without knowing. (I so can imagine "Barrister in Making" telling me about mens rea or rather, lack thereof.)
Was in the pantry this morning and because we are in a serviced office, we get all sorts of people from all over the world working around us. There's always this group of mid-30s guys who always spend excessive long time chatting away in the pantry. When it comes to activities, I'm like one of the boys which explains why I always get invites to after-work beer or weekend out at sea. Never been to anyone of these. Well, they are afterall guys and you don't have to think very hard to know what they want. This morning, as usual, I went to get my tea and one of guys, "Spongebob" screamed "hey, sexy legs". I was shell-shocked. I've never been called that and to be truthful, I felt flattered. After waking up to reality, I snubbed, "you mean sexy heels, thunderthighs?" I loved the next comment which I'm very proud to announce, he said, "sexy heels. very sexy legs". I could remarked naughtily, "so, my place or yours." I just blushed and thanked him and walked away. Argh, girls are such suckers for compliments knowing these boys need to be taught a lesson for being so mischievous. Having said that, they are a great bunch for some fun and alcohol and to set the record straight for the benefits of my nieces reading this, I have never gone home with guys casually and I will not do do, so do not try these. Such conversations are meant for aging aunties like me who's not hip enough to attend Gwen Stefani's concert! I'm so falling into your Mom's category, not that it's a bad thing but I still wanna feel young!!! Aiyoh, I actually wanted to go for the Ah Mei concert.
Anyway, went out for a walk during lunchtime to take a breather. Didn't know what to get, absolutely no appetite. I'm so sick and tired of Raffles Place, sitting around sniffling away trying to get as much sun within that 10 mins. Ended up shopping around and the prize: another pair of shoes which I doubt I'd wear it more than 3 times. Will post up some pictures.
"Coffee Punter" brought her little bubba in when I came back. He's so cute. Intending to get some pictures up tonight as well so keep watching this space. Er, refresh them occasionally.
Check this out... Beauty!!! All BMW M3 Sold Out in the UK
Back to work and banging my head on all Middle East Oil & Gas companies...
Sunday, August 19, 2007
心动
Time really flies. It's almost a year since Grandma passed away. She's probably the only person in this world I've come to love more than myself. When Mom & Dad were busy working, the whole world hated me cuz I was such a weird kid, she never gave up on me. It's not very healthy to be staying home on a Sunday night and sinking into self-pity but I really miss her. Over the past year, so much has happened. Among the cousins, some got divorced, some got married, some had babies, the others are still searching. The nieces & nephews have all moved on from the courtship state to total awkwardness. We have all grown up.
For myself, it was like a roller coaster ride. My job wise, it always seems like it's moving but it actually isn't. Most of the time it's money in the pocket then taken away from you. Then again, the experiences learnt were invaluable.
"Pretty Ka-Chng" and myself have hugged each other so many times with tears covering our faces. This isn't one of the best years. It's like taking baby steps all over again. Both of us all got out from what seemed the worst relationships ever but well, she's got 2 beautiful daughters and me, let's just say I'm glad I'm still not married.
Unfortunately for us, we've got the weirdest sets of parents ever. Our parents seem to find joy in wrecking havoc in our lives. Trust me, you wouldn't believe it until you've met and seen our parents. We're our Grandma's favourite and if she knows her 2 favourite girls are crying themselves to sleep, she'll hold our hands reassuringly and remind us that we're smart girls but we're too strong for our own good. She has always hoped we marry the right people but life is such, we can only do the best for ourselves and hope the others fall into place themselves. I hope my favourite cousin can be strong for her girls and remember, "Ah Ma" is watching us from heaven.
This song is for you, Biao Jie...
有多久没见你
以为你在那里
原来就住在我的心底
陪伴着我的呼吸
有多远的距离
以为闻不到你的气息
谁知道你背影这么长
回头就看到你
过去让它过去
来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果
不能够永远都在一起
也至少给我们
怀念的勇气
拥抱的权利
好让你明白
我心动的痕迹
过去让它过去
来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果
不能够永远都在一起
也至少给我们
怀念的勇气
拥抱的权利
好让你明白
我心动的痕迹
总是想再见你
还试着打探你的消息
原来
你就住在我的身体
守护我的回忆
For myself, it was like a roller coaster ride. My job wise, it always seems like it's moving but it actually isn't. Most of the time it's money in the pocket then taken away from you. Then again, the experiences learnt were invaluable.
"Pretty Ka-Chng" and myself have hugged each other so many times with tears covering our faces. This isn't one of the best years. It's like taking baby steps all over again. Both of us all got out from what seemed the worst relationships ever but well, she's got 2 beautiful daughters and me, let's just say I'm glad I'm still not married.
Unfortunately for us, we've got the weirdest sets of parents ever. Our parents seem to find joy in wrecking havoc in our lives. Trust me, you wouldn't believe it until you've met and seen our parents. We're our Grandma's favourite and if she knows her 2 favourite girls are crying themselves to sleep, she'll hold our hands reassuringly and remind us that we're smart girls but we're too strong for our own good. She has always hoped we marry the right people but life is such, we can only do the best for ourselves and hope the others fall into place themselves. I hope my favourite cousin can be strong for her girls and remember, "Ah Ma" is watching us from heaven.
This song is for you, Biao Jie...
有多久没见你
以为你在那里
原来就住在我的心底
陪伴着我的呼吸
有多远的距离
以为闻不到你的气息
谁知道你背影这么长
回头就看到你
过去让它过去
来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果
不能够永远都在一起
也至少给我们
怀念的勇气
拥抱的权利
好让你明白
我心动的痕迹
过去让它过去
来不及
从头喜欢你
白云缠绕着蓝天
如果
不能够永远都在一起
也至少给我们
怀念的勇气
拥抱的权利
好让你明白
我心动的痕迹
总是想再见你
还试着打探你的消息
原来
你就住在我的身体
守护我的回忆
My Immortal
Have you ever seen the "Pimp My Ride UK"? The host so doesn't make the cut. He tries a little too hard to be "Yo, Yo, Yo man, Hip Hop is here to stay..." I'd rather be watching the National Day Rally, at least it gives me the false impression that the economy is improving. Be realistic, the Sing Dollar hasn't been particularly strong which subsequently makes shopping in Hong Kong and Tokyo alot more expensive. "Income Gap" - one of the main points this year. Unfortunately, no amount of sympathising is gonna help. At least for me, I know I'm going to use my hands to make the difference for myself.
Ironically, I'm sitting here blogging away because I refused to get changed and go all the way to town for dinner. You see, I was in jeans and it wasn't quite the preferred dress code for the club. Here I am, hungry and bored, entertaining you.
Somehow I kinda like how i spent my Sunday though. Had one of those addictive Pepper Lunch... Ahh Rib-eye steak.
Walked around Kinokuniya and bought an array of chiccy books. One of which was on Oprah, co-authored by one of the Sex & The City writers, Greg Behrendt, "he's just not that into you". None of these books ever made any practical sense to me but does indeed boost the feminine side of you quite a bit. Still remembered when I first told BR about "Why Men Love Bitches" & "Why Men Marry Bitches", I was only hoping that would boost her confidence a little and not keep getting herself into those sucky relationships. When the man doesn't respect you, it is absolutely pointless to cling on to him. No matter how much you actually love him and feel he's perfect, if he's not bothered to ask you out or pick up the phone to ring you, well you know he's just not that into you.
BR, I know you read my blog on a regular basis. Please know through all these years, I've always loved you as a best friend and I've only wanted the best for you. Some men are just not worth it. My Dad told me once that if a man ever lay his finger on me, I should never look back and walk away immediately. Stop deluding yourself that you're happy with your supposedly colourful life. I know you cry yourself to sleep because I used to do that. It took me so many years to realise that I should not be living in fear. If they do not learn how to appreciate us, we will have to do it ourselves. Only when you learn to love yourself, will others learn to love you. you are a strong girl and one day, you will get out of this shit. I don't really know how to put this nicely but I think the whole "non-exclusive relationship" thing is just bull-shit. You know at some level, your "Old Man Octopus" does love you and both of you do get jealous inevitably. I want you back and I want you to be happy and if you tell me now that you're truly happy with this arrangement and you're not sobbing when the lights are out, I admit defeat. All I want for you is your smile. One of those shining from within. One of those on our faces after a good wakeboarding session when you know you had a good ride.
Having said that, I know it's tough when you're really in it. I'm anything but rational...
The skies' so gray today... The raining is simply hypnotising... And the song lingers...
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
Going back to watching very old episodes of Top Gear. Jeremy Clarkson cracks me up...
Ironically, I'm sitting here blogging away because I refused to get changed and go all the way to town for dinner. You see, I was in jeans and it wasn't quite the preferred dress code for the club. Here I am, hungry and bored, entertaining you.
Somehow I kinda like how i spent my Sunday though. Had one of those addictive Pepper Lunch... Ahh Rib-eye steak.
Walked around Kinokuniya and bought an array of chiccy books. One of which was on Oprah, co-authored by one of the Sex & The City writers, Greg Behrendt, "he's just not that into you". None of these books ever made any practical sense to me but does indeed boost the feminine side of you quite a bit. Still remembered when I first told BR about "Why Men Love Bitches" & "Why Men Marry Bitches", I was only hoping that would boost her confidence a little and not keep getting herself into those sucky relationships. When the man doesn't respect you, it is absolutely pointless to cling on to him. No matter how much you actually love him and feel he's perfect, if he's not bothered to ask you out or pick up the phone to ring you, well you know he's just not that into you.
BR, I know you read my blog on a regular basis. Please know through all these years, I've always loved you as a best friend and I've only wanted the best for you. Some men are just not worth it. My Dad told me once that if a man ever lay his finger on me, I should never look back and walk away immediately. Stop deluding yourself that you're happy with your supposedly colourful life. I know you cry yourself to sleep because I used to do that. It took me so many years to realise that I should not be living in fear. If they do not learn how to appreciate us, we will have to do it ourselves. Only when you learn to love yourself, will others learn to love you. you are a strong girl and one day, you will get out of this shit. I don't really know how to put this nicely but I think the whole "non-exclusive relationship" thing is just bull-shit. You know at some level, your "Old Man Octopus" does love you and both of you do get jealous inevitably. I want you back and I want you to be happy and if you tell me now that you're truly happy with this arrangement and you're not sobbing when the lights are out, I admit defeat. All I want for you is your smile. One of those shining from within. One of those on our faces after a good wakeboarding session when you know you had a good ride.
Having said that, I know it's tough when you're really in it. I'm anything but rational...
The skies' so gray today... The raining is simply hypnotising... And the song lingers...
I'm so tired of being here
Suppressed by all my childish fears
And if you have to leave
I wish that you would just leave
'Cause your presence still lingers here
And it won't leave me alone
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears
When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears
And I held your hand through all of these years
But you still have
All of me
You used to captivate me
By your resonating light
Now I'm bound by the life you left behind
Your face it haunts
My once pleasant dreams
Your voice it chased away
All the sanity in me
These wounds won't seem to heal
This pain is just too real
There's just too much that time cannot erase
I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone
But though you're still with me
I've been alone all along
Going back to watching very old episodes of Top Gear. Jeremy Clarkson cracks me up...
Saturday, August 18, 2007
Don't Cha
I have to say playing with 3 little girls and 2 little boys is alot of fun when they all love you to bits. The only drawback - my bones are falling apart. Ordered pizza for them - one of them wants the crispy corners of the pizza, the other one wants the ham. Another one will come running to you with one chicken wing in each hand and tell you she's done with it when she's only peeled off the skin. With unbelieveable patience, I slowly explained that we'd have to finish our food and there's alot left on the chicken wing and it's bad to waste food. While trying to peel the ham off the pizza, i was trying my best to debone the chicken wings as well. This whole process went on for a couple of hours and i'm glad i'm not insane yet.
When they start crying, instead of returning them back to their parents, I was trying so hard to soothe them only to get repaid with each of them pulling one of my limb wanting me to do something. I can't ever be more torn than this.
When I was younger, I've always wanted to be a Mom before i hit 26 but look at me now, I'm stressed over 5 kids fighting for attention. Then again, if I have kids after 30, I can't imagine how am I ever going to have the energy to run after them and teach them the right values.
At the same time, there are about 10 adults sitting around the table behind me talking about their wedding plans. Sent shivers straight up my spine. They are all about my age and all of them are getting married. Is time really running out for me? Started with before 24, then before 26 and now I can only hope, before 30. Someone once told me when he's 50, he wants to be at a bar drinking with his son and his son's friends will all be calling him by his name and drinking with him. He's 35 this year, recently divorced.
Someone else asked me last night, why don't i be a lesbian? Frankly, I'd have been one had "XXX" not been attached then. I always have a soft spot for her and she's so cute. In fact, all my friends are on the other direction of the traffic. Come to think of it, I probably wouldn't have the courage to do that. Besides, i've always preferred men. And to top it all, I can't wait for the day to be a real Mom which is why I've always believed eveiry woman must go through natural birth and only when there's complications would ever think of c-section. Natural birth is part of the experience of being a woman and I still don't understand why some fret. I might one day, who knows.
Since I was little, I've always imagined the bext job in a world is to be a mother and that has not changed. Some may think I'm mad but once you've experienced coming home to a little thing smiling at you, all the stress from work will simply vanish. Everytime I look at Lala and the way she says "Bao Bao Me", I'd melt and everything else in the world is just secondary. Even now she's too heavy to be carried around all the time, I'll gladly risk having having sore arms but I just want to carry her close to me for her to plant a wet kiss on my cheek. Whenever you sing, "Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me", and she'll use her sweetest voice to continue, "Don't cha." How cute is that!!!
As of now, I'm probably not ready for motherhood. Whenever they cry, I just want to return them to their Moms or the helpers. But just imagine stepping through the door and this little imp runs up to you calling, "Mommy!" or "Daddy". The world would be so complete...
When they start crying, instead of returning them back to their parents, I was trying so hard to soothe them only to get repaid with each of them pulling one of my limb wanting me to do something. I can't ever be more torn than this.
When I was younger, I've always wanted to be a Mom before i hit 26 but look at me now, I'm stressed over 5 kids fighting for attention. Then again, if I have kids after 30, I can't imagine how am I ever going to have the energy to run after them and teach them the right values.
At the same time, there are about 10 adults sitting around the table behind me talking about their wedding plans. Sent shivers straight up my spine. They are all about my age and all of them are getting married. Is time really running out for me? Started with before 24, then before 26 and now I can only hope, before 30. Someone once told me when he's 50, he wants to be at a bar drinking with his son and his son's friends will all be calling him by his name and drinking with him. He's 35 this year, recently divorced.
Someone else asked me last night, why don't i be a lesbian? Frankly, I'd have been one had "XXX" not been attached then. I always have a soft spot for her and she's so cute. In fact, all my friends are on the other direction of the traffic. Come to think of it, I probably wouldn't have the courage to do that. Besides, i've always preferred men. And to top it all, I can't wait for the day to be a real Mom which is why I've always believed eveiry woman must go through natural birth and only when there's complications would ever think of c-section. Natural birth is part of the experience of being a woman and I still don't understand why some fret. I might one day, who knows.
Since I was little, I've always imagined the bext job in a world is to be a mother and that has not changed. Some may think I'm mad but once you've experienced coming home to a little thing smiling at you, all the stress from work will simply vanish. Everytime I look at Lala and the way she says "Bao Bao Me", I'd melt and everything else in the world is just secondary. Even now she's too heavy to be carried around all the time, I'll gladly risk having having sore arms but I just want to carry her close to me for her to plant a wet kiss on my cheek. Whenever you sing, "Don't cha wish your girlfriend was hot like me", and she'll use her sweetest voice to continue, "Don't cha." How cute is that!!!
As of now, I'm probably not ready for motherhood. Whenever they cry, I just want to return them to their Moms or the helpers. But just imagine stepping through the door and this little imp runs up to you calling, "Mommy!" or "Daddy". The world would be so complete...
Krug vs Dom
Good champagne can't get far from being a Dom Pérignon since he's the very man who invented champagne. It's little brother, Moet, that just does not seem to meet the cut. The bubbles are rough and I'd rather take a Veuve in a heartbeat. Then again, when it comes to true celebration since I've never abandon the thought that champagnes are poisons of occasions, my choices would either be Krug's Grande Cuvée, Moet's Dom Perignon or Veuve's La Grande Dame. For now, I shall keep my mouth shut just because we give Moets as gifts and I still drink them on a regular basis.
Some people love Krug for it's oaky feel and that it's drier than its peers. Let's just call this acquired taste. Personally, I love the Krug but if given a choice, I'll still take the Dom Perignon or La Grande Dame. They feel less complicated and more feminine. Somehow, Krug feels like the masculine version of Veuve's La Grande Dame. Don't come up with the crap that Krug's a guy and Clicquot's a girly. It's just how I feel.
It's weird how you can have slow and lasting sips from the bottle of whiskey by your bedside but you're yearning for a Dom Perignon. But somehow you're hoping that this Dom will be a whiskey one day so that you can enjoy it slowly and not having to finish it once it's chilled and popped and get done and over in no time.
Champagne can lose its bubbles and go into refermentation, it will never be a whiskey. It's afterall from grapes, not grains. If only champagne can go into further fermentation and lose its bubbles, one you can keep and enjoy. Most importantly, not losing the joy of sipping one. On one of these Clicquot Love Seats.
Shit. I can't stay at home all Saturday blogging on boring things like that. Who wants to go shopping with me? I need to check out something over at Kate Spade.
Humming...
听着自己的心跳
没有规则的跳跃
我安静的在思考
并不想被谁打扰
我们曾紧紧拥抱
却又轻易地放掉
这种感觉很微妙
该怎麽说才好
Some people love Krug for it's oaky feel and that it's drier than its peers. Let's just call this acquired taste. Personally, I love the Krug but if given a choice, I'll still take the Dom Perignon or La Grande Dame. They feel less complicated and more feminine. Somehow, Krug feels like the masculine version of Veuve's La Grande Dame. Don't come up with the crap that Krug's a guy and Clicquot's a girly. It's just how I feel.
It's weird how you can have slow and lasting sips from the bottle of whiskey by your bedside but you're yearning for a Dom Perignon. But somehow you're hoping that this Dom will be a whiskey one day so that you can enjoy it slowly and not having to finish it once it's chilled and popped and get done and over in no time.
Champagne can lose its bubbles and go into refermentation, it will never be a whiskey. It's afterall from grapes, not grains. If only champagne can go into further fermentation and lose its bubbles, one you can keep and enjoy. Most importantly, not losing the joy of sipping one. On one of these Clicquot Love Seats.
Shit. I can't stay at home all Saturday blogging on boring things like that. Who wants to go shopping with me? I need to check out something over at Kate Spade.
Humming...
听着自己的心跳
没有规则的跳跃
我安静的在思考
并不想被谁打扰
我们曾紧紧拥抱
却又轻易地放掉
这种感觉很微妙
该怎麽说才好
Friday, August 17, 2007
The Heavenly E92
My Idea Of A Car!
BMW happened to be the first to have iPod integration and now they’ve jumped on the Apple iPhone bandwagon ensuring iPhone Bluetooth (audio and hands-free calling) integration ahead of all the other luxury-brand cars. The 3 and 5 series models with a production date of March ‘07 or later, X5 models April ‘07 or later and 6 series models September ‘07 or later will have full iPhone integration when they roll out of the factories.
Source: Cnet
Put that through Hamann for some surgery... Ooh... Chiselled - Just like how i like my man. It's like a younger version of Pierce Brosnan. Now, don't you feel like "driving" it.
Now check out these rims...
Rain Rain Go Away
When I got home last night, my stomach was growling real loudly. I started to recall what I ate and I'm very sure none of my friends would believe this - I only had a few mouthful of mushroom soup from Soup Spoon during lunch, some finger food and a lot of champagne in the evening. That was all. No wonder the tummy's complaining. But bizarrely, I didn't had the craving or yearning for any sort of food. Looking at the way things are going, it'd be a piece of cake for me to lose a couple of stones. Then again, that was never my intention. I think I'll go for dim sum today and fatten myself up...
Drinks were fantastic yesterday. We manage to get almost everyone in the office to come along including the admin staffs and some of our candidates came along to join us as well. I don't even remember how many bottles of Veuves we actually finished but thankfully, the company is paying for all that.
"Comedy Boss" expressing his gratitute."
Just as we were leaving, we heard this cat meowed real audibly around us so the group of recruiters went around looking for a cat. So i finally found the cat with this shot...
Weather's really bad today which means that if this goes on tomorrow, I can't go wakeboarding.
My fingers and toes are all crossed today. Will announce it when it's finalised. Then again, if you know the nature of my job, you'd have guessed the answer.
For those of you who wants an extravagant brunch this Sunday, Greenhouse is serving Dom Pérignon instead of the usual Moët but of course, you'd be paying slightly more than double the usual price. If I'm not wrong, it's about S$268+++ for the Dom brunch. Anyone? Ahhhhh...
Drinks were fantastic yesterday. We manage to get almost everyone in the office to come along including the admin staffs and some of our candidates came along to join us as well. I don't even remember how many bottles of Veuves we actually finished but thankfully, the company is paying for all that.
"Comedy Boss" expressing his gratitute."
Just as we were leaving, we heard this cat meowed real audibly around us so the group of recruiters went around looking for a cat. So i finally found the cat with this shot...
Weather's really bad today which means that if this goes on tomorrow, I can't go wakeboarding.
My fingers and toes are all crossed today. Will announce it when it's finalised. Then again, if you know the nature of my job, you'd have guessed the answer.
For those of you who wants an extravagant brunch this Sunday, Greenhouse is serving Dom Pérignon instead of the usual Moët but of course, you'd be paying slightly more than double the usual price. If I'm not wrong, it's about S$268+++ for the Dom brunch. Anyone? Ahhhhh...
Thursday, August 16, 2007
What A PiTy!
My colleague who works from home sent me a reply on drinks night - "Hi lovely – you are back in one piece. Gosh, I remember when you were just a young, innocent lass who would only drink one drink. Them days are gone I guess! I am so sorry but I can’t make tomorrow night. Not to worry – you all have fun. Have a drink for me." See! I was young and innocent when i first came here. Those were the days.
Spent the entire morning doing the Pipeline report only to find out later that it's not due for another 2 hours. I've already done it! I'm hopeless with Excel. Can anyone help?
Every time when i see the PT Cruiser, it reminds of of a hearse and they even have a PT Cruiser Lovers Club??!! What are these people thinking? http://www.ptlovers.com What's the world coming to?
Look at this - Doesn't it look like it's the back of the PiTy Cruiser?
Since we're on the topic of cars, do you know the bloody Skoda cab is actually quite fast. I was driving "Xiao Bai" one day and I wanted to race that fucking cab to the converging lane leading to the expressway and as you know, when you're waiting for the turbo to kick in, you just go like fucking slow so I actually lost to that cab! Well, after we hit the expressway, after "Xiao Bai" managed to spit out more fuel, I did eventually overtook him but that's not the point. The point is, i lost for that 3 seconds. How infuriating!
I never quite noticed that the number of MINI's on the road. Somehow, the whole journey home from Vivocity were filled by these pocket rockets of various colours. How weird. Have anyone of of you ever thought why is MINI written in CAPS when MINI should have been mini? As in mini Mini? Speaking of the MINI, I still remembered when "Monkey" was shopping for "Xiao Hei", we all went along for "the space test". We would have been trapped our way up to Malacca had he bought the freaking MINI okay... "ZhaoCaiMao" and myself got into the car and we thought, hmm, great shopping car but we were trying so hard to discourage "Monkey" from buying one. Everytime we see a MINI on the road, he'll be like, "woah" and we'll all call him wuss. "Why you wanna buy this wuss car?", "What is wrong with you, wussy?" Ok, back to the space test, somehow, they got me to test the bloody space behind and after I got into in, they closed the bloody door and left me in the puny space alone. Not knowing how to get out, I felt freakingly claustrophobic and was on the brink of bursting into tears. Trust me, the MINI is meant to be a 2 normal person car or a 4 midget seater. Do not try this (the space test) at home. Good gracious. Eventually, "Monkey" settled for "Xiao Hei" - the fake R32. Sidetrack - Last week when we drove Xiao Hei to Vivo while "Monkey" was away in Shanghai, a couple (obviously German) gave us the thumbs up. I was just thinking, maybe if they have seen the little brother engine, they might just change their mind. "Xiao Hei" might look like a R32, in actual fact... "Monkey", don't kill me please.
Sorry guys, the car poll isn't quite working so bear with the bug and it'll be back soon.
Oh have i told you, the all supped up T5 once owned by Comedy Boss' brother-in-law was traded for a Carerra. Should have bought the T5. It was a great deal he offered. I don't need to say it's a great ride, excellent handling and ooohh, sexy body. Stop it you guys, it's not squashed up! It's the lines that gave it its sex appeal. You're just jealous...
Spent the entire morning doing the Pipeline report only to find out later that it's not due for another 2 hours. I've already done it! I'm hopeless with Excel. Can anyone help?
Every time when i see the PT Cruiser, it reminds of of a hearse and they even have a PT Cruiser Lovers Club??!! What are these people thinking? http://www.ptlovers.com What's the world coming to?
Look at this - Doesn't it look like it's the back of the PiTy Cruiser?
Since we're on the topic of cars, do you know the bloody Skoda cab is actually quite fast. I was driving "Xiao Bai" one day and I wanted to race that fucking cab to the converging lane leading to the expressway and as you know, when you're waiting for the turbo to kick in, you just go like fucking slow so I actually lost to that cab! Well, after we hit the expressway, after "Xiao Bai" managed to spit out more fuel, I did eventually overtook him but that's not the point. The point is, i lost for that 3 seconds. How infuriating!
I never quite noticed that the number of MINI's on the road. Somehow, the whole journey home from Vivocity were filled by these pocket rockets of various colours. How weird. Have anyone of of you ever thought why is MINI written in CAPS when MINI should have been mini? As in mini Mini? Speaking of the MINI, I still remembered when "Monkey" was shopping for "Xiao Hei", we all went along for "the space test". We would have been trapped our way up to Malacca had he bought the freaking MINI okay... "ZhaoCaiMao" and myself got into the car and we thought, hmm, great shopping car but we were trying so hard to discourage "Monkey" from buying one. Everytime we see a MINI on the road, he'll be like, "woah" and we'll all call him wuss. "Why you wanna buy this wuss car?", "What is wrong with you, wussy?" Ok, back to the space test, somehow, they got me to test the bloody space behind and after I got into in, they closed the bloody door and left me in the puny space alone. Not knowing how to get out, I felt freakingly claustrophobic and was on the brink of bursting into tears. Trust me, the MINI is meant to be a 2 normal person car or a 4 midget seater. Do not try this (the space test) at home. Good gracious. Eventually, "Monkey" settled for "Xiao Hei" - the fake R32. Sidetrack - Last week when we drove Xiao Hei to Vivo while "Monkey" was away in Shanghai, a couple (obviously German) gave us the thumbs up. I was just thinking, maybe if they have seen the little brother engine, they might just change their mind. "Xiao Hei" might look like a R32, in actual fact... "Monkey", don't kill me please.
Sorry guys, the car poll isn't quite working so bear with the bug and it'll be back soon.
Oh have i told you, the all supped up T5 once owned by Comedy Boss' brother-in-law was traded for a Carerra. Should have bought the T5. It was a great deal he offered. I don't need to say it's a great ride, excellent handling and ooohh, sexy body. Stop it you guys, it's not squashed up! It's the lines that gave it its sex appeal. You're just jealous...
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
Champagne...
Finally, got the guys for drinks...
Comedy Boss thought this is a really cheeky email so I've decided to share it with all of you.
"Hello All,
It’s about time we drink our livers sore. Champagne… oooh…
16th August (Thursday) – Quick drink over at Indochine Empress Place after work. We might be leaving the office a little earlier. Woohoo! http://www.indochine.com.sg/
23rd August (Thursday) – Dinner & Drinks @ One Rochester Park http://www.onerochester.com
Attendance is compulsory!
Cheers (Pun intended)"
Now you see, with the database down and all of us bored, we could finally get our drinks night fixed. Blessing in disguise... An ALKI office!
Comedy Boss thought this is a really cheeky email so I've decided to share it with all of you.
"Hello All,
It’s about time we drink our livers sore. Champagne… oooh…
16th August (Thursday) – Quick drink over at Indochine Empress Place after work. We might be leaving the office a little earlier. Woohoo! http://www.indochine.com.sg/
23rd August (Thursday) – Dinner & Drinks @ One Rochester Park http://www.onerochester.com
Attendance is compulsory!
Cheers (Pun intended)"
Now you see, with the database down and all of us bored, we could finally get our drinks night fixed. Blessing in disguise... An ALKI office!
Bad Appetite & Long Nails???
I was so reluctant to click on the Send/Receive button this morning and after I did so, I just saw numbers rolling and took my time to make so tea. The database is down and technically, I can't really work. Still, I'm sinking myself in to clear those disgusting emails.
Dressed down in all black today, still extremely lethargic from the lack of sleep. The usual executive look just wasn't the greatest way to bring me back to the stupid emails. Totally disorganised. Even my thoughts, they're all over the place. Haven't you already notice that?
"Elitist" was grumbling all morning about how inefficient our IT guy is (but he's my favourite guy!!!) and was very sarcastic on how beautiful Bangkok is with all the pollution and how gawdy the temples are but hey, that's Bangkok for you alright. And he rattled on endlessly about how his mobile didn't ring and he checked. Well, we thought we'd do drinks while we were both there but really, I wasn't in the mood to. I just wanted a break from work and the last person I wanna see would be him. Besides, I'd rather go for another massage. Fucking irritating. Argh...
I lost a little weight when i was in Bangkok. On the first day, my appetite was still normal. I was eating heaps but second day on, i lost it all. I nibbled, picked and was eating like a mouse. Then i start to wonder, is it the food of is it just me? Now that I'm back with the same old Soup Spoon and Food Barn, I don't exactly feel like I want any food at all. What is wrong with the Chomp Chomp Machine? I'm still hungry, any given time of the day but surprisingly, I have no urge to hunt down food.
Yuck, my nails are too long and i can't type. I'm so unlike a normal girl and mind you, I really hope to be able to bear with nice long nails. Could still recall when i first came in, "Comedy Boss" told me that he was very surprised to see the "Interests" part of my CV - Cars, gadgets... Blah... Well, both of us love cars so we could go on and on. Maybe that's what got me the job.
Let me get back to work and I'll update you guys of the bits of my trip to Bangkok.
Btw, whoever called me last night, number withheld, please do leave me a voice message (i have that function for a reason!) or send me a text message. I really don't like to be left scratching all my hair off. Freaking frustrating! Might be a client but which one.......
Dressed down in all black today, still extremely lethargic from the lack of sleep. The usual executive look just wasn't the greatest way to bring me back to the stupid emails. Totally disorganised. Even my thoughts, they're all over the place. Haven't you already notice that?
"Elitist" was grumbling all morning about how inefficient our IT guy is (but he's my favourite guy!!!) and was very sarcastic on how beautiful Bangkok is with all the pollution and how gawdy the temples are but hey, that's Bangkok for you alright. And he rattled on endlessly about how his mobile didn't ring and he checked. Well, we thought we'd do drinks while we were both there but really, I wasn't in the mood to. I just wanted a break from work and the last person I wanna see would be him. Besides, I'd rather go for another massage. Fucking irritating. Argh...
I lost a little weight when i was in Bangkok. On the first day, my appetite was still normal. I was eating heaps but second day on, i lost it all. I nibbled, picked and was eating like a mouse. Then i start to wonder, is it the food of is it just me? Now that I'm back with the same old Soup Spoon and Food Barn, I don't exactly feel like I want any food at all. What is wrong with the Chomp Chomp Machine? I'm still hungry, any given time of the day but surprisingly, I have no urge to hunt down food.
Yuck, my nails are too long and i can't type. I'm so unlike a normal girl and mind you, I really hope to be able to bear with nice long nails. Could still recall when i first came in, "Comedy Boss" told me that he was very surprised to see the "Interests" part of my CV - Cars, gadgets... Blah... Well, both of us love cars so we could go on and on. Maybe that's what got me the job.
Let me get back to work and I'll update you guys of the bits of my trip to Bangkok.
Btw, whoever called me last night, number withheld, please do leave me a voice message (i have that function for a reason!) or send me a text message. I really don't like to be left scratching all my hair off. Freaking frustrating! Might be a client but which one.......
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
Kiss Me
I know how incorrigible I am when I find myself blogging away on Microsoft Word as soon as I boarded the plane. Guess that actually makes time fly faster (pun unintended). Once again, I got upgraded to business class. The way to do it? Try checking in online and check the flight to see if it’s very full or the very empty. If it’s near full, click on the seat leaving a gap between yourself and someone else. The reasoning behind this is when couples check in later, they’d want to be together so they’d rather upgrade one than two. Then again, I was totally sweet when I saw the guy at the check in counter. Using my sweetest ever super “tneh” voice to greet him “Good Morning” in the most chirpy sense. Usually, they’d ask, “you traveling alone?” and/or “only you one girl?” then very buay pai seh and say, “Yes! Does that mean I get a free upgrade?” Usually you’d get it if it’s not full. I do get my privileges and prerogative as a single traveling girl alright. If you’re already on Business Class, when too many people gets upgraded from Economy to Business, you get to move to First Class. Isn’t that exciting?
Frankly, I don’t quite need an upgrade. I’ve already paid for Cathay instead of the budget air so the trip is already much better. Well, I’ve never been on a budget air so I really wouldn’t know how it is. It could be pretty good and for a trip SIN-BKK, that could do the job. I needed flexibility for my ticket in any case that I need to leave earlier or later I could just pack up and go and I really don’t mind paying for it. I reckon I’d just be paying for the miles I chalk. Guess when it comes to flying, I’m that bit more patriotic. I never used to quite settle for anything less than SQ but in recent years, the quality of SQ weren’t like a decade ago and the price just doesn’t justify the almost clean safety record, SQ006 aside.
Woke up early this morning, completely knackered. Fell in and out of sleep last night trying to watch very bad quality “Ratatouille” DVD but felt sick soon after. Got to be the funny ice cream I had. Funnily, I enjoyed the few hours of aimless snuggling, short for the fact it’s not on a loft, It would have been perfect. I must say, that weird feeling came very close.
Cutting into my super tough steak and for the fact that they don’t serve Veuve when I’m craving for it now, I’m just going to be crapping. Bear with my nonsense…
Leaving Bangkok for the millionth time (it’s a figure of speech, for God’s sake), this is the one time that I’m looking forward to leave yet feeling like I’ve left a part of me behind with “Kiss Me” by Six Pence Non The Richer ringing in my head. Many things, people or experiences in our lives leave their footprint but whether it’d be washed away by the waves waits to be seen. Most come and go and others are here to stay. Ironically, people or things who/that are here to stay may not be the ones we most look forward to but you know, you can live with it. Which reminds me, the nice simple Made In Thailand all leather Boston bag could have set me back by quite a couple of hundred bucks (not baht). – [Sidetrack a little. As much as I always “suan” myself with the latest LV, I’ve never owned a single piece. It’s just not me. The monogram irks me. Ta da, surprised? Why do you think I’m a Kate Spade fan??!!] Anyway, the plain Boston bag - Loved it. But not meant to be mine. Not its destiny. Not mine to have it. Just like some people, if you want entirely different things, it’s absolutely pointless to pursue. For me, I just want a snugglicious good time with someone whom I can spend the rest of my life, seeking simple happyness in everyday life. From people like Ex-Sir’s Sir’s recent divorce, I came to realise marriage is not the destination. Being able to live and tolerate one another would be the greater challenge and remaining happy would be the end point and unfortunately, it’s a continuous process with no end point. Some people love to race themselves to the nearest fastfood restaurant and get their tummy filled. Others would wait for homecooked food to be served. But if two persons with each looking forward to different types of food and surely, purpose in life, will we find joy? As much as I’d love to be able to run to the fastfood restaurant and get dinner settled, deep down inside, I only want homecooked food, the sort that you go home everyday to find them warm on the table. Very simple dishes, very fulfilling for the soul.
Ever heard of the song 天空? I like this part…
听着自己的心跳
没有规则的跳跃
我安静的在思考
并不想被谁打扰
我们曾紧紧拥抱
却又轻易地放掉
这种感觉很微妙
该怎麽说才好
I need a massage. One of those snugglicious massages with the masseur trying to use crooked fingers to rub off all the tough knots.
Frankly, I don’t quite need an upgrade. I’ve already paid for Cathay instead of the budget air so the trip is already much better. Well, I’ve never been on a budget air so I really wouldn’t know how it is. It could be pretty good and for a trip SIN-BKK, that could do the job. I needed flexibility for my ticket in any case that I need to leave earlier or later I could just pack up and go and I really don’t mind paying for it. I reckon I’d just be paying for the miles I chalk. Guess when it comes to flying, I’m that bit more patriotic. I never used to quite settle for anything less than SQ but in recent years, the quality of SQ weren’t like a decade ago and the price just doesn’t justify the almost clean safety record, SQ006 aside.
Woke up early this morning, completely knackered. Fell in and out of sleep last night trying to watch very bad quality “Ratatouille” DVD but felt sick soon after. Got to be the funny ice cream I had. Funnily, I enjoyed the few hours of aimless snuggling, short for the fact it’s not on a loft, It would have been perfect. I must say, that weird feeling came very close.
Cutting into my super tough steak and for the fact that they don’t serve Veuve when I’m craving for it now, I’m just going to be crapping. Bear with my nonsense…
Leaving Bangkok for the millionth time (it’s a figure of speech, for God’s sake), this is the one time that I’m looking forward to leave yet feeling like I’ve left a part of me behind with “Kiss Me” by Six Pence Non The Richer ringing in my head. Many things, people or experiences in our lives leave their footprint but whether it’d be washed away by the waves waits to be seen. Most come and go and others are here to stay. Ironically, people or things who/that are here to stay may not be the ones we most look forward to but you know, you can live with it. Which reminds me, the nice simple Made In Thailand all leather Boston bag could have set me back by quite a couple of hundred bucks (not baht). – [Sidetrack a little. As much as I always “suan” myself with the latest LV, I’ve never owned a single piece. It’s just not me. The monogram irks me. Ta da, surprised? Why do you think I’m a Kate Spade fan??!!] Anyway, the plain Boston bag - Loved it. But not meant to be mine. Not its destiny. Not mine to have it. Just like some people, if you want entirely different things, it’s absolutely pointless to pursue. For me, I just want a snugglicious good time with someone whom I can spend the rest of my life, seeking simple happyness in everyday life. From people like Ex-Sir’s Sir’s recent divorce, I came to realise marriage is not the destination. Being able to live and tolerate one another would be the greater challenge and remaining happy would be the end point and unfortunately, it’s a continuous process with no end point. Some people love to race themselves to the nearest fastfood restaurant and get their tummy filled. Others would wait for homecooked food to be served. But if two persons with each looking forward to different types of food and surely, purpose in life, will we find joy? As much as I’d love to be able to run to the fastfood restaurant and get dinner settled, deep down inside, I only want homecooked food, the sort that you go home everyday to find them warm on the table. Very simple dishes, very fulfilling for the soul.
Ever heard of the song 天空? I like this part…
听着自己的心跳
没有规则的跳跃
我安静的在思考
并不想被谁打扰
我们曾紧紧拥抱
却又轻易地放掉
这种感觉很微妙
该怎麽说才好
I need a massage. One of those snugglicious massages with the masseur trying to use crooked fingers to rub off all the tough knots.
Monday, August 13, 2007
Grumpiness Never Takes A Holiday
Stupid windows recognises the network and everything on my God-damn screen is in Thai. It's been a good few days and looking at the way I’m getting used to the massages here, you guys might have to wait a little while before you have me back in Singapore. I won't be able to go for dinner with "CCM creator" and "Twiggy" until i get back but wait for me, I’ll go have some neat sashimi.
I would never ever classify myself as a workaholic but whenever the internet connection fails me, I'd be depressed and desperate. Totally handicapped. I need to check my email regularly but then again, i need to be thankful that I do not have a Blackberry. Yet. Until that day, i will pretend that i love my work so much that I have to be on the internet 24/7.
Things never seem to move when I'm back home and suddenly, I have interviews flying around and hopelessly impossible new roles to fill flooding my inbox. When will the GLCs ever learn that if they're not paying (enough), people are not moving. Then comes the difficulty of my job - These people need to move before I bloody get paid and sometimes, i feel like a fool for telling people that they're moving for so many other reasons so we'll have to not look at the dollar factor. Truth is, few companies are going to be vastly different from the one next door. Lawyers still get overworked, overpaid. Many still don't get to go home to their kiddies. Well, which explains why they often have their family portrait sitting on their desk - to remind them how their spouses and kids actually look like.
Even while I’m on holiday, I’m still freaking upset with work. Offers are still disappointing, clients are seeing the weirdest candidates, good candidates are left with the second class choices and most importantly, I’m not going to be the one placing these people. Part of the fun in this job is meeting interesting people but unfortunately, people like me feels the pain the most when we can't get these candidates good offers or interviews to begin with. "He who thinks he's a freaking elitist" wouldn't be feeling any pain but he brings the dough to the king at the end of the day. Does that make me a terrible recruiter?
I'm so sick and tired of the roller-coaster nature of this job which happens to be the exact reason how I fell in love with it in the first place. It's just harsh when reality sits in and really, we're not living in a bed of roses as much as I’d love to think so. What do I really want in life?
I would never ever classify myself as a workaholic but whenever the internet connection fails me, I'd be depressed and desperate. Totally handicapped. I need to check my email regularly but then again, i need to be thankful that I do not have a Blackberry. Yet. Until that day, i will pretend that i love my work so much that I have to be on the internet 24/7.
Things never seem to move when I'm back home and suddenly, I have interviews flying around and hopelessly impossible new roles to fill flooding my inbox. When will the GLCs ever learn that if they're not paying (enough), people are not moving. Then comes the difficulty of my job - These people need to move before I bloody get paid and sometimes, i feel like a fool for telling people that they're moving for so many other reasons so we'll have to not look at the dollar factor. Truth is, few companies are going to be vastly different from the one next door. Lawyers still get overworked, overpaid. Many still don't get to go home to their kiddies. Well, which explains why they often have their family portrait sitting on their desk - to remind them how their spouses and kids actually look like.
Even while I’m on holiday, I’m still freaking upset with work. Offers are still disappointing, clients are seeing the weirdest candidates, good candidates are left with the second class choices and most importantly, I’m not going to be the one placing these people. Part of the fun in this job is meeting interesting people but unfortunately, people like me feels the pain the most when we can't get these candidates good offers or interviews to begin with. "He who thinks he's a freaking elitist" wouldn't be feeling any pain but he brings the dough to the king at the end of the day. Does that make me a terrible recruiter?
I'm so sick and tired of the roller-coaster nature of this job which happens to be the exact reason how I fell in love with it in the first place. It's just harsh when reality sits in and really, we're not living in a bed of roses as much as I’d love to think so. What do I really want in life?
Sunday, August 12, 2007
Shopping in Bangkok (Minus The Boatride)
My 3rd day in Bangkok and i'm getting bored. We're back in the hotel after very little shopping. Just didn't have the excitement we had on the first day but i have to say, great company = great fun.
On the first day, upon arrival, i dashed myself to the customs trying to see the city once again with unprecedented fervour. Getting stuck at the customs for 1 hours didn't quite help the situation and i was burning but even then, i managed to make a Japanese girl who offered to start queueing in another line and we'll just see who gets there faster. Seeing big white men getting into fights because one cut the queue of the other did lighten my mood a little. How sadistic. Eventually when i was out of the queue, i took a 400 baht cab to Asok where my hotel for this trip is located.
"Ex-Sir's Sir" left the key with the reception so when i got there i went straight to a seemingly gorgeous room. Then again, i spent barely 30 mins in it before i raced to MBK to meet with the rest. The concierge recommended the boat ride which would only cost 10 baht as compared to taking the MRT then subsequently changing to the BTS. Yeah it's a little confusion. So i went to take the boat alone. What an adventure it was. They were all filled with people and it's a feat just to get up the boat alone. I took a total of 2 attempts just to get up the superbly overcrowded boat. The water was emitting this unbearable stench of leavings. The thought of me makes me want to throw up. Finally i reached Pratunam but it was a far way to MBK. I should have taken a cab. Goodness. I walked to the BTS and took a train to MBK before i was simply too lazy to walk any further. Found the rest at the tailors. You can't imagine how glad i was to see them. It wasn't at all dangerous but the boatride itself was traumatising. BTW, i took the boatride again today with the rest and some of the water went into my mouth. YUCK... I feel sick!!!
Since then, we've been shopping, eating, pampering ourselves with endless massages and manicures/pedicures. During one of the mani/pedi session last night, i found out that "Sir Fit Fit's" wife, "Big Eyes" was from the same primary school, secondary school and JC. What are the chances? We couldn't stop laughing and her sister was my basketball teammate in secondary school. She used to play basketball too, like myself. We know the same people and we were taught by the same teachers. How amazing is that!
Did i forget to mentioned that i spend the whole of yesterday madly shopping from Chatuchak, without any rest, we went off to Centralworld, Siam Square, Discovery Centre and back to MBK for their fitting for the suit. It was insane but i loved it.
Today was alot more relaxed. Did minimal shopping and came back to the hotel for a rest. "Sir Fit Fit" wasn't feeling too well so we just took it real slow. I seriously think i need to get myself another massage... Ahhhhhhh....
On the first day, upon arrival, i dashed myself to the customs trying to see the city once again with unprecedented fervour. Getting stuck at the customs for 1 hours didn't quite help the situation and i was burning but even then, i managed to make a Japanese girl who offered to start queueing in another line and we'll just see who gets there faster. Seeing big white men getting into fights because one cut the queue of the other did lighten my mood a little. How sadistic. Eventually when i was out of the queue, i took a 400 baht cab to Asok where my hotel for this trip is located.
"Ex-Sir's Sir" left the key with the reception so when i got there i went straight to a seemingly gorgeous room. Then again, i spent barely 30 mins in it before i raced to MBK to meet with the rest. The concierge recommended the boat ride which would only cost 10 baht as compared to taking the MRT then subsequently changing to the BTS. Yeah it's a little confusion. So i went to take the boat alone. What an adventure it was. They were all filled with people and it's a feat just to get up the boat alone. I took a total of 2 attempts just to get up the superbly overcrowded boat. The water was emitting this unbearable stench of leavings. The thought of me makes me want to throw up. Finally i reached Pratunam but it was a far way to MBK. I should have taken a cab. Goodness. I walked to the BTS and took a train to MBK before i was simply too lazy to walk any further. Found the rest at the tailors. You can't imagine how glad i was to see them. It wasn't at all dangerous but the boatride itself was traumatising. BTW, i took the boatride again today with the rest and some of the water went into my mouth. YUCK... I feel sick!!!
Since then, we've been shopping, eating, pampering ourselves with endless massages and manicures/pedicures. During one of the mani/pedi session last night, i found out that "Sir Fit Fit's" wife, "Big Eyes" was from the same primary school, secondary school and JC. What are the chances? We couldn't stop laughing and her sister was my basketball teammate in secondary school. She used to play basketball too, like myself. We know the same people and we were taught by the same teachers. How amazing is that!
Did i forget to mentioned that i spend the whole of yesterday madly shopping from Chatuchak, without any rest, we went off to Centralworld, Siam Square, Discovery Centre and back to MBK for their fitting for the suit. It was insane but i loved it.
Today was alot more relaxed. Did minimal shopping and came back to the hotel for a rest. "Sir Fit Fit" wasn't feeling too well so we just took it real slow. I seriously think i need to get myself another massage... Ahhhhhhh....
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Greetings From Bangkok
I do not have regular internet access and i have a time limit to finish this entry in 15 mins. I have so much i want to blog about, the intimidating boat ride and the adventure to hunt down my friends. Will fill you guys up asap and meanwhile, watch this space and i'll be back sooner than you think.
I need another massage.
I need another massage.
Friday, August 10, 2007
Leaving On A Jetplane
How nice it is to be at the Singapore Changi Airport again and looking at the weather, i think i will encounter quite a bit of turbulence today. You must be thinking that i'm blogging to make full use of the wireless network here right? You're wrong! They do not have wireless internet here and i need to use the bloody old computer with the words "FREE INTERNET" shining brightly above my head. As i was typing the sentence above, the computer just shut itself down without any warning since i'm only given a 15 mins usage time even though there are like 10 other sets here with no one using them. Singapore Changi Airport, one of the supposedly top airports in the world, does not have wireless internet access. What a joke! So much for being competitive. Well, before the next 15 mins runs up, i'm gonna let you guys know that i will blog as often as i can to keep you updated, in case i get hit down by a car or my plane gets bombed, you guys will know where exactly i am. My parents would want to know, i bought travel insurance too. Though it's the cheapest "Classic" option.
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Stockholmised Singaporean Sings
For the first time, our National Day Parade (NDP) would be held at Marina Bay until the new sports hub is up and running. It's our 42nd birthday and I'm feeling less and less patriotic as the nation gets older. I can still remember vividly as a little kid, i was always excited about National Day, singing the national celebration songs and with my eyes all welled up, choking on my tears while reading the pledge proudly and maybe right inside me, i was thinking that one day, I'm gonna do this nation proud.
I'm still working very hard and hopefully my country would be proud of me one day. The feeling resembles that of a kid who grew up and wanted your parents to be proud of you but your parents were never there for you when you needed them and you doubt if they'd ever appreciate the hard work you've gone through.
All my life, I've tried so hard to swim above peers my level, keeping my head above the water and not get swept away with the strong tidal waves. Singapore is like one big parent who has this ocean all cleared out cleanly for you to swim, keeping you safe with it's barricades and without an open gate, encourages you to swim out. I have learn to swim over the years but I found it hard to venture outside the gates. Every time when you try to open the gate, your parent will come up to you and tell you how dangerous it is outside and that they're fucking rich but they do not have any resources to buy you a buoy or snokelling gear.
Many of us have been told by the government so many times that they have put aside money to encourage entrepreneurs. They set up Spring and other bodies run by first class honours recipients and when you apply for a loan to set up a business you have in mind, they will have to go through 23578 steps of procedures to come back to tell you that they cannot grant you the money because you need a certain amount of capital to do so. When you ask why, they'll tell you that they need to check and after going through 58749 steps, they tell you you're just not good enough and you could probably find it easier to get a bank loan from the local banks with their hands tied to who they can loan the freaking money to. You've to to prove that you're totally able to provide for yourself before they loan you. Then why would i need the loan then? Well, that's another story good for a whole new grumbling session.
If you parents had tied up your hands and feet and tell you repeatedly that they love you, you will believe it one day but that's what we call, Stockholm Syndrome - a psychological response sometimes seen in an abducted hostage, in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger (or at least risk) in which the hostage has been placed.
This is my country. This is my flag. This is my future. This is my life. This is my family. These are my friends. We are Singapore, Singaporeans. Well, all true and good. Now, give me freedom and let me grow. Think: Why was i streamed into sub-science classes when i could have gone doing freaking Godly pure science. Oh i know... My parents can't afford to put me in a good school and i was streamed at a very young age to think, i'm not that fucking smart afterall. Only the smart or rich kids get there... Don't i sound cynical? That is what Singapore mean to me. Don't have to criticise me. Just my thoughts. Let me say what i want, CAN?
I'm still working very hard and hopefully my country would be proud of me one day. The feeling resembles that of a kid who grew up and wanted your parents to be proud of you but your parents were never there for you when you needed them and you doubt if they'd ever appreciate the hard work you've gone through.
All my life, I've tried so hard to swim above peers my level, keeping my head above the water and not get swept away with the strong tidal waves. Singapore is like one big parent who has this ocean all cleared out cleanly for you to swim, keeping you safe with it's barricades and without an open gate, encourages you to swim out. I have learn to swim over the years but I found it hard to venture outside the gates. Every time when you try to open the gate, your parent will come up to you and tell you how dangerous it is outside and that they're fucking rich but they do not have any resources to buy you a buoy or snokelling gear.
Many of us have been told by the government so many times that they have put aside money to encourage entrepreneurs. They set up Spring and other bodies run by first class honours recipients and when you apply for a loan to set up a business you have in mind, they will have to go through 23578 steps of procedures to come back to tell you that they cannot grant you the money because you need a certain amount of capital to do so. When you ask why, they'll tell you that they need to check and after going through 58749 steps, they tell you you're just not good enough and you could probably find it easier to get a bank loan from the local banks with their hands tied to who they can loan the freaking money to. You've to to prove that you're totally able to provide for yourself before they loan you. Then why would i need the loan then? Well, that's another story good for a whole new grumbling session.
If you parents had tied up your hands and feet and tell you repeatedly that they love you, you will believe it one day but that's what we call, Stockholm Syndrome - a psychological response sometimes seen in an abducted hostage, in which the hostage shows signs of loyalty to the hostage-taker, regardless of the danger (or at least risk) in which the hostage has been placed.
This is my country. This is my flag. This is my future. This is my life. This is my family. These are my friends. We are Singapore, Singaporeans. Well, all true and good. Now, give me freedom and let me grow. Think: Why was i streamed into sub-science classes when i could have gone doing freaking Godly pure science. Oh i know... My parents can't afford to put me in a good school and i was streamed at a very young age to think, i'm not that fucking smart afterall. Only the smart or rich kids get there... Don't i sound cynical? That is what Singapore mean to me. Don't have to criticise me. Just my thoughts. Let me say what i want, CAN?
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
Sexy Swim Wear
Go to Wholesome Wear and check out some really "sexy" swim wear. Consider getting them for your wives. Don't worry, i won't be attending your funeral.
Keep clicking next till you see a John Travolta look-alike. He's got boobs. Is he a tranny or what? Even John Travolta as Edna Turnblad in Hairspray looks way better. Do i see stubbles above his lips? Oh well, her lips?
Check this out: "The Skirted Swimmer has the Spandex under garment for maximum flexibility, and is joined at the zipper to a looser fitting skirted outer garment. The skirt snaps between the legs for in the water and unsnaps for playing on the beach or going to town without changing." maybe i should just get one of these for wakeboarding.
This looks way better.
Someone help! I'm getting cramps from over laughing.
Keep clicking next till you see a John Travolta look-alike. He's got boobs. Is he a tranny or what? Even John Travolta as Edna Turnblad in Hairspray looks way better. Do i see stubbles above his lips? Oh well, her lips?Check this out: "The Skirted Swimmer has the Spandex under garment for maximum flexibility, and is joined at the zipper to a looser fitting skirted outer garment. The skirt snaps between the legs for in the water and unsnaps for playing on the beach or going to town without changing." maybe i should just get one of these for wakeboarding.
This looks way better.
Someone help! I'm getting cramps from over laughing.
Monday, August 06, 2007
Low Carb Diet
Thought i'd blog shortly on Low Carb Diet i mentioned on my tagboard.
Why Low Carb Diets Are Bad? (Well, may not be that bad but it's bad for me cuz i love fatty food)
I never go on diet, let alone a low carb diet. Many around me have done so and i've read up quite a bit on the facts. Essentially, you have to remember low carb diet is high fat diet. Low carb diet work if you are on really low carb, almost insignificant. The sugars in the carb will make fats stay in your body so if you choose to be on low carb, you will have to be careful with your glucose laced food and your fat intake. You won't need me to tell you a high fat diet blocks up your arteries and you die a slow and painful death. Well, sometimes, it is quick and happens sooner than you think.
Do not forget your fibre - Soluble & insoluble ones.
Why Low Carb Diets Are Bad? (Well, may not be that bad but it's bad for me cuz i love fatty food)
I never go on diet, let alone a low carb diet. Many around me have done so and i've read up quite a bit on the facts. Essentially, you have to remember low carb diet is high fat diet. Low carb diet work if you are on really low carb, almost insignificant. The sugars in the carb will make fats stay in your body so if you choose to be on low carb, you will have to be careful with your glucose laced food and your fat intake. You won't need me to tell you a high fat diet blocks up your arteries and you die a slow and painful death. Well, sometimes, it is quick and happens sooner than you think.
Do not forget your fibre - Soluble & insoluble ones.
Feeling Like Rabbit Food
I haven't got the best digestive system ever but i only have myself to blame. Afterall, my diet had been anything but healthy. I avoid green food as much as i can and i love fried stuffs.
Fried = Friend
For the past weeks, I've been trying to go to the gym more often, solely because I've paid for it and I'm not utilising it and Fitness First is not exactly cheap to begin with. To tell you the truth, i still haven't been trying to fit in the gym sessions enough. I can lie to myself but the weighing scale is cruelly honest. When it started to jump into unfamiliar zones of numbers which I've never ever been there, i got worried but I was quite encouraged to stay away from unhealthy food.
Slowly, i found myself buying clothings in sizes of Medium and no longer small and when i meant medium, it's European size medium and standing at 5'1, I've always been vertically challenged. Any slight weight jump is just going to show through the flesh as fats and cellulites. In the range of 8 stones, I'm looking more and more like Doraemon. See the 50:50 distribution with it's prosperous looking waistline!
For lunch today, I've only had salad. What an achievement! (And so i thought - I did avoid the mayonnaise!!!) I still can't believe it and now at 4 pm, I'm hungry. With afterwork drinks, don't think the salad is going to help much. Just trivial you might wish to know - Coke contains 100 calories whereas a screwdriver contains 180 of those scary things. I'm not someone who believes in dieting so the whole salad affair is never going to work for me but I'll be thrilled to see less zits on my face. All the Old Chang Kee is not doing my skin nor figure any good.
Do you know of anything yummy yet healthy?
Fried = Friend
For the past weeks, I've been trying to go to the gym more often, solely because I've paid for it and I'm not utilising it and Fitness First is not exactly cheap to begin with. To tell you the truth, i still haven't been trying to fit in the gym sessions enough. I can lie to myself but the weighing scale is cruelly honest. When it started to jump into unfamiliar zones of numbers which I've never ever been there, i got worried but I was quite encouraged to stay away from unhealthy food.
Slowly, i found myself buying clothings in sizes of Medium and no longer small and when i meant medium, it's European size medium and standing at 5'1, I've always been vertically challenged. Any slight weight jump is just going to show through the flesh as fats and cellulites. In the range of 8 stones, I'm looking more and more like Doraemon. See the 50:50 distribution with it's prosperous looking waistline!For lunch today, I've only had salad. What an achievement! (And so i thought - I did avoid the mayonnaise!!!) I still can't believe it and now at 4 pm, I'm hungry. With afterwork drinks, don't think the salad is going to help much. Just trivial you might wish to know - Coke contains 100 calories whereas a screwdriver contains 180 of those scary things. I'm not someone who believes in dieting so the whole salad affair is never going to work for me but I'll be thrilled to see less zits on my face. All the Old Chang Kee is not doing my skin nor figure any good.
Do you know of anything yummy yet healthy?
Sunday, August 05, 2007
You Mean I Used To Hate Shopping???
My Favourite Girl
My initial intention was to post some pictures of Juju and Nani's concert pictures today. Unfortunately, i was seated way to far and none of the pictures turned out horribly so i'll just give that a miss. Then again, you guys did not miss out. Like Tubby said, "you've seen one, you've seen it all" and he could even guess the song the kids were going to sing based on the vague introduction by the kindergarten teacher. Looking at the auditorium of Nanyang Girls filled with anxious parents, i started to wonder - Will i become one of those eager parents laughing at my kid's performance but right inside, you feel incredibly proud of them?
As already, i'm loving these four little fellows to bits. No prize but guessing it right but my favourite would be littlest Lala. She sure knows the way to tug me right and just the very way she calls me, melts me instantly. You wouldn't imagine how comforting it is to see her welcome me with her sunshine-like smile and her inability to stay still because she's all too excited to see me. Naturally, whenever i see little shoes, little clothes, little water bottles, basically anything little and especially if it's in the shade of her favourite blue, i'd want her to own a piece of that. Would that qualify as spoiling? I have my rules with kids very well and the kids in this households knows that very well and when they crosses the boundary, it will be made known to them. No kids will ever climb over my head and i'll never allow that to happen. Call me "lao gu ban" but i believe there should be basic respect as much as i'd love to be their soulmate and their friend. Unlike our parents, i know i can because i wouldn't judge. So don't start flaming me on how i intend to discipline my kids if i were to ever have any.
Did quite a fair bit of shopping today. All the walking from Tanglin Club all the way to Ngee Ann City and back did not even tire me the least bit. Maybe because i wasn't the one carrying the paperbags. A question for girls: Have you realised that whenever we buy cosmetics, the real items never quite take up much space but we always go off with the biggest paperbag they have in the store because the ridiculous, redundant free gifts simply fill up all the spaces available. And you might wish to know, there's a special promotion happening at Tangs when you used your credit card to purchase. Apart from the usual rebate, you will also get a $20 voucher when you buy above a certain amount. Hence, the more you buy, the better discounts you get. Meanwhile, you accumulate more redeemable points on your Citibank card. How satisfying! There're quite a big of great sales out there and if you need to buy anything from Aussino, I have the discount cards that you might wish to borrow. Do give me a buzz and we can all go mad together.
When i saw the kids playing on their handheld games, sitting on the stairs waiting for their Moms who are probably busy shopping in the boutique, reminded me on how i used to hate shopping with my Mom and guess what, people do change. I did and i love shopping... Now i really hope that i have the courage to walk into LV and exchange a signature for my checkerboard series and feel painful for the next few months. Well, my mind is still intact and i'm still too sensible to do just yet. I need a lunatic moment to do that. Who knows? I might end up happier. That is, before my credit card bill arrives...
My initial intention was to post some pictures of Juju and Nani's concert pictures today. Unfortunately, i was seated way to far and none of the pictures turned out horribly so i'll just give that a miss. Then again, you guys did not miss out. Like Tubby said, "you've seen one, you've seen it all" and he could even guess the song the kids were going to sing based on the vague introduction by the kindergarten teacher. Looking at the auditorium of Nanyang Girls filled with anxious parents, i started to wonder - Will i become one of those eager parents laughing at my kid's performance but right inside, you feel incredibly proud of them?
As already, i'm loving these four little fellows to bits. No prize but guessing it right but my favourite would be littlest Lala. She sure knows the way to tug me right and just the very way she calls me, melts me instantly. You wouldn't imagine how comforting it is to see her welcome me with her sunshine-like smile and her inability to stay still because she's all too excited to see me. Naturally, whenever i see little shoes, little clothes, little water bottles, basically anything little and especially if it's in the shade of her favourite blue, i'd want her to own a piece of that. Would that qualify as spoiling? I have my rules with kids very well and the kids in this households knows that very well and when they crosses the boundary, it will be made known to them. No kids will ever climb over my head and i'll never allow that to happen. Call me "lao gu ban" but i believe there should be basic respect as much as i'd love to be their soulmate and their friend. Unlike our parents, i know i can because i wouldn't judge. So don't start flaming me on how i intend to discipline my kids if i were to ever have any.
Did quite a fair bit of shopping today. All the walking from Tanglin Club all the way to Ngee Ann City and back did not even tire me the least bit. Maybe because i wasn't the one carrying the paperbags. A question for girls: Have you realised that whenever we buy cosmetics, the real items never quite take up much space but we always go off with the biggest paperbag they have in the store because the ridiculous, redundant free gifts simply fill up all the spaces available. And you might wish to know, there's a special promotion happening at Tangs when you used your credit card to purchase. Apart from the usual rebate, you will also get a $20 voucher when you buy above a certain amount. Hence, the more you buy, the better discounts you get. Meanwhile, you accumulate more redeemable points on your Citibank card. How satisfying! There're quite a big of great sales out there and if you need to buy anything from Aussino, I have the discount cards that you might wish to borrow. Do give me a buzz and we can all go mad together.
When i saw the kids playing on their handheld games, sitting on the stairs waiting for their Moms who are probably busy shopping in the boutique, reminded me on how i used to hate shopping with my Mom and guess what, people do change. I did and i love shopping... Now i really hope that i have the courage to walk into LV and exchange a signature for my checkerboard series and feel painful for the next few months. Well, my mind is still intact and i'm still too sensible to do just yet. I need a lunatic moment to do that. Who knows? I might end up happier. That is, before my credit card bill arrives...
Friday, August 03, 2007
Summing Up Of A Pathetic Week
Yet another Friday and it's sad how I'm actually looking forward to one after another. Then again, weekends are money squeezing and you end up spending them not knowing how. The sun is out and I'm hoping to be able to do some wakeboarding this weekend. Anyone up for it?
Do you know that it costs about 6 bucks for me to take a cab from my place to the train station even if it's just 2 bus stops away? We have a 2 dollar surcharge and i used to pay for all of these and i didn't know. Need to think about how my money is going out or I'll never be able to afford my LV checkerboard. I realise too that i've always been saying but i'll never bring myself to go buy such stuffs but I'll willingly swipe it on food. Few hundred dollars on sashimi alone is not foreign in my credit card bills.
Krispy Kreme always seem like a hit and miss for me. "BFG" came back from Sydney some time back and no Krispy Kreme. "Oscar's Mommy" came back from Sydney as well and guess what, no Krispy Kreme. "Christmas Island" came some time ago and she couldn't get me Krispy Kreme cuz she had no time to get it. History is gonna repeat yourself. My "Amazing Race team-mate" from our Hong Kong office would be coming this weekend and still, no Krispy Kreme cuz it wouldn't be fresh by the time she meet up with me. Extremely depressing... But i'm just gonna deal with Dunkin' Donuts while I'm in Bangkok next week. Yes I'm going on a much needed holiday. Would be there for a week just to slow down my pace and go for some massages...
"Guttercat's" 2nd baby is turning 1 month today so we'd be going for the Asian version of the baby shower that comes after the baby's birth. Red eggs were traditionally given away as an auspicious announcement. Few do that now but i know i would if i become a new mother. Few know this but I'm a sucker for very traditional stuffs when it comes to big occasions like this.
Work was less than satisfactory for me this week. Haven't gotten any new clients, new assignments, new offers, new placements.. I feel like I'm rotting away and totally unappreciated around here with my boss deciding how unfair the system shall remain and why i shouldn't be promoted yet. Although it's just going to be just the title and everything would be the same, why me? Anyone thing i didn't do right? I'm whining, ain't i? Not a good thing. I'm dreading yet the arrival of another work week...
Do you know that it costs about 6 bucks for me to take a cab from my place to the train station even if it's just 2 bus stops away? We have a 2 dollar surcharge and i used to pay for all of these and i didn't know. Need to think about how my money is going out or I'll never be able to afford my LV checkerboard. I realise too that i've always been saying but i'll never bring myself to go buy such stuffs but I'll willingly swipe it on food. Few hundred dollars on sashimi alone is not foreign in my credit card bills.
Krispy Kreme always seem like a hit and miss for me. "BFG" came back from Sydney some time back and no Krispy Kreme. "Oscar's Mommy" came back from Sydney as well and guess what, no Krispy Kreme. "Christmas Island" came some time ago and she couldn't get me Krispy Kreme cuz she had no time to get it. History is gonna repeat yourself. My "Amazing Race team-mate" from our Hong Kong office would be coming this weekend and still, no Krispy Kreme cuz it wouldn't be fresh by the time she meet up with me. Extremely depressing... But i'm just gonna deal with Dunkin' Donuts while I'm in Bangkok next week. Yes I'm going on a much needed holiday. Would be there for a week just to slow down my pace and go for some massages...
"Guttercat's" 2nd baby is turning 1 month today so we'd be going for the Asian version of the baby shower that comes after the baby's birth. Red eggs were traditionally given away as an auspicious announcement. Few do that now but i know i would if i become a new mother. Few know this but I'm a sucker for very traditional stuffs when it comes to big occasions like this.
Work was less than satisfactory for me this week. Haven't gotten any new clients, new assignments, new offers, new placements.. I feel like I'm rotting away and totally unappreciated around here with my boss deciding how unfair the system shall remain and why i shouldn't be promoted yet. Although it's just going to be just the title and everything would be the same, why me? Anyone thing i didn't do right? I'm whining, ain't i? Not a good thing. I'm dreading yet the arrival of another work week...
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
Chow Ah Beng; Bloody Old Man
What is wrong with this picture?
It may sound hypocritical if I tell you, smoking is banned at all bus stops and terminals. Fact is, IT IS! Then again, if he's Tom Cruise or Brad Pitt, I wouldn't be that adamant.
He just irritates the fuck out of me. I was already late and i was trying so hard not to call for a cab cuz it costs me a freaking 30 bucks to get a cab to work each morning and i've already done that several times for the past few weeks. Not very wise. I'm imagining bit by bit of my LV bag leaving me albeit it's stitch by stitch with that amount.
Yet again, I digress.
That man was actually squatting at the make shift bus-stop. When was the last time we saw someone squat like that? Brings me back to 20 years ago when the five foot way was a common ground for evening rest after dinner and the uncle who sells bread cycles into the neighbourhood selling the cream bun for 20 cents. Sounds damn snobbish but how uncivilised.
When the bus finally arrived, he hobbled to the bus stop like a drug addict which i was guessing and pretty much right that he's under influence of forbidden substances. Adn he SQUEEZED his way through... Everyone else in the queue were ladies... FEMALES... There was even an old lady and an expectant Mom and HE FOUGHT passed us. WTF!
Hope i don't see him tomorrow. Then again, i must bring myself to get out of the bed earlier because "Shrek" is coming into the office tomorrow and I'd better not give him an excuse to pounce at me.
Wake me up before you go go....
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