Lean On Me

Things are finally normal again. This is the first time in months that we have full attendance in the office and the first time in month since I had a heart to heart chat with Meiren Biaojie.

Stress is just part and parcel of life. The signs on the skin can be fixed and we shall go skincare shopping next month. I will also get my Mom to fix up an appointment with the dermatologist so that we can get the peels done. But the other things in life are not that easy to solve. The birds will grow up and fly. They are already flying and you can see and feel it. They will eventually take longer migratory flights and you will need to find a hand to hold and someone who will watch the sunset with you while the birds create their nest and complete their annual migratory pattern. As much as I can, I will be a shoulder you can lean on but I am not the hand you will hold on to as well. My hands will one day be full because I will have hands to hold me and hands I need to hold. Like we said, if I followed your footsteps, I would be holding the hands of a 5 year old and a 1 year old now. Loneliness is just part of the package even if you have that someone to walk down towards the horizon with. It's God's way of giving you your "Me" time. I know it's easier said...

Before I left for New York, I had shows I wanted to watch and things I needed to get. The rain yesterday stopped me from doing all that yesterday but maybe I was plain grouchy and the loneliness was very much self-inflicted. Although I want Meiren Biaojie to have great expectations, I can feel myself clamming up to the starting point of no expectations then there will be no disappointment. But simply because we are human beings with emotions, it will never be possible if we have no expectations because that in itself, is an expectation. Is disappointment inevitable or can it all boil down to the root of perception? Can I, will I and shall I change the angle of light?

Weekends are evil times... Makes people think too much.