I Don't Wanna Miss A Thing

This post is probably not going to contain one of my best language ability, not even on a prep level. My mind is confused and i'm really unable to organise my thoughts and be able to write them in any sensible sequence. Being the legally trained person i am, i had to disclaim and in anycase you feel like scolding me for being such a nutter or a brainless idiot, please feel free to call and scold me because my tears and hugs need an outlet.

I have to admit that i haven't been feeling good these days. Spoke to "I Got My Name While Learning To Ride A Horse" earlier on and he was talking about his gf giving him major problems because she's too insecure. Now they're taking a week off in their relationship. M, Come back to Singapore! I'll give you a hug!

I did try to convince him that he's lucky someone loves him so much and such but surprisingly, i was defending the girl and not him. However when i heard the details of the story, he does have my sympathy and i do agree the girl went a little overboard, then again, it's for love, it can easily be forgiven and i would forgive people who demand because they love. I told him he's lucky that he's got someone to snuggle in bed with on Sunday mornings and have someone to hug and kiss him with no quantiy ceiling. Value the person who is next to you. You'll know it sucks when you've got no one. I was in a relationship where the other party was too possessive and overly jealous, i survived because i knew he loved me. I've learnt to live with it, i'm glad i didn't leave him because he loved me too much.

However, this whole overly possessive thing is coming back to me like a recurring nightmare. I'm not with anyone, let alone someone who is possessive. I think i've fallen for someone whom i shouldn't be falling for. No not my boss, no not my colleagues, no not my cousins, no not some French bloke, just a man who is full of himself, clever but sends "i'm actually stupid" text messages, someone whom i'd love to laugh with and snuggle in bed on Sunday mornings, someone whom i'll look forward running half the world with, someone whom i'd want to go to the movies with, someone whom i'd wanna walk the dog with. I suppose i'm not bright enough to be sending out all the bloody wrong signals.

Don't get me wrong, not one of those, "i wanna flirt with you but don't want a relationship" sort of signals. He thinks i'm open which i am on certain spectrum but on a closer inspection, i'm actually one of the most conservative creatures you'll ever meet, though it's not quite reflected in my actions and dress sense. Well since he thinks i'm open, he sends me really really sweet text messages which sends smiles on my face stretching from ear to ear everytime i see them. (BTW, i smile at the slightest sweet thing he says - gosh i'm mad!) The messages were filled with hugs and kisses and so i thought he might be interested in me and i did reciprocate those messages thinking he's someone nice, funny, clever, cute, interesting whom i'd want to go out with.

Until today when the frequency of acting stupid was getting a little too much for me to take(well because usually guys will make certain move which he never did and i do not want to play the guessing game any longer), to begin with i wasn't in a great mood and when you actually do you scroll down to read my last post, you'll know. I was straight about the hugs and kisses and it was misleading me, and if he hadn't had any intention to bring this forward, he should stop. He mentioned that anyone who falls for him will be in all sorts of trouble and i replied that i'm probably in trouble. Up to this point, which of you guys out there does not get what i'm trying to say. It's already so explicit. Get it?

The reason why i said he's a clever man trying to act like a blonde in his texts, God knows from which messages, i was promoted to the "buddy status". Girls reading this, when someone(usually a girl but in this case it's a guy) says we'll be friends or you felt like a friend or we're in the friend zone or you're such a buddy, it only means "you're a nice friend but you're not good enough to be my passenger if i only have a coupe" or "you haven't got legs like Giselle hence you don't qualify to be my girl" or simply, "i do not like you in the romantically inclined way." I read it in a more subtle way, i do not want to be in any relationship with you but if THE girl comes by, all hell will break loose and i'll just ignore whatever principles i have. Basically, the guy just doesn't like me, or anyone for the matter of fact, enough to commit. Gosh i was stupid to even think he's got a liking, i do think too highly of myself, haven't i. But hey, i'm VERY eligible ok? I'm beginning to sound incoherent, ain't i? I'm losing it! It's HIS LOSS! Right? (*breaking down after screaming that)

Having said all that, i don't mind being the buddy and i guess i'll end up being the buddy, the Aunt Aggie when he ever encounters such problems with someone else. I always end up as the buddy don't i? Maybe because i'm just like "one of the guys".

He mentioned before that this is a nice song, i don't disagree and i loved this song since school days but it's just too sarcastic to be hearing it now.

I could stay awake just to hear you breathing
Watch you smile while you are sleeping
Far away and dreaming
I could spend my life in this sweet surrender
I could stay lost in this moment forever
Well, every moment spent with you
Is a moment I treasure

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Lying close to you
Feeling your heart beating
And I'm wondering what you're dreaming
Wondering if it's me you're seeing
Then I kiss your eyes and thank God we're together
And I just wanna stay with you
In this moment forever, forever and ever

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I don't wanna miss one smile
I don't wanna miss one kiss
Well, I just wanna be with you
Right here with you, just like this
I just wanna hold you close
Feel your heart so close to mine
And stay here in this moment
For all the rest of time

Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
'Cause I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

I don't wanna close my eyes
I don't wanna fall asleep
'Cause I'd miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing
'Cause even when I dream of you
The sweetest dream will never do
I'd still miss you, babe
And I don't wanna miss a thing

Don't wanna close my eyes
Don't wanna fall asleep, yeah
I don't wanna miss a thing