Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Kiss Me...

It's been days since I last had a good night's sleep. Last night was of no exception. After A&E Quack left my place after a brief photoshoot session with my dog, I went straight to bed. I was constantly waking up and dreams filled up my sleep. I don't quite remember much details because I simply had too much dreams just in one night.

I have blogged this countless times but I can't help it but feel like I need to run back to where Grandma used to live and just enjoy the breeze with her in the backyard. Whenever I feel overloaded, I just want to run to the back of the house and cry. The last time I did that was on Grandma's funeral.

I just wanna tell her wherever she may be...

我爱上让我奋不顾身的一个人
我以为这就是我所追求的世界
然而横冲直撞被误解被骗
是否成人的世界背后总有残缺
我走在每天必须面对的分岔路
我怀念过去单纯美好的小幸福
爱总是让人哭
让人觉得不满足
天空很大却看不清楚
好孤独

As I sit here with my mind totally focused on work, I'm in fact very disoriented when it comes to how I should be feeling. Vulnerable is one word I would never like to use on myself. To see me shed tears is rare and most people probably wouldn't have the chance to experience this sight. People see me as chirpy, gleeful and bubbly but of a sudden, I feel too drained to put on a smile. I just want to sleep without those irritating dreams.

The kiss in the dream was comforting and to be able to see the face that's beyond reach was anything but a nightmare. Nevertheless, it is still a dream. I could stretch and reach... All I could feel is the dull breeze in the air that reminds me of how life is playing a trick on me.

All I wanna do is to go home...

But...

Where's home?

Kiss me out of the bearded barley
Nightly, beside the green, green grass
Swing, swing, swing the spinning step
You wear those shoes and I will wear that dress.

Oh, kiss me beneath the milky twilight
Lead me out on the moonlit floor
Lift your open hand
Strike up the band and make the fireflies dance
Silver moon's sparkling
So kiss me

Kiss me down by the broken tree house
Swing me upon its hanging tire
Bring, bring, bring your flowered hat
We'll take the trail marked on your father's map

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