A Whole New World

Written on the way to Phuket 28 August 2008

Reluctant to blog on a new relationship for fear of jinxing it, I couldn’t care less any more. I just need to scream about how happy I’ve been over the past few days/weeks. Things didn’t quite go off on a smooth note. Things weren’t what I can ever expect. Says who that lightning never strikes twice on the same spot? I beg to differ. I have 2 radically different individual telling me how eaten by guilt that are and the backseat was where I really belong. Unlike the last time, I didn’t allow fate to take me where it wanted to. I didn’t want to go with the flow and be swept by the waves. Like Manuka said after everything closed, that I give my man the freedom to choose and decide and more often, that results in the other person walking further away.

Sitting in my mini Silkair economy class seat to Phuket which by the way, was planned less than 24 hours ago and here I am, hitting the sun, the sand and the sea. Only catch, it’s still monsoon season over in Phuket. It’s a break Alcoholic Empress Dowager, Fongster and I needed before we start our new jobs. Yes, all 3 of us are starting our new jobs very soon.

What I have left behind in Singapore this time is a man whom I know I can trust to love his car more than he can ever love anyone. The Shadow Hell Rider is someone I would never imagine myself to be with. First and foremost, I have never dated anyone younger than myself. Like most sound advice that I’ve heard, patience is a virtue that I must nurture. Meanwhile, there are a lot of sanding down, fender rolling, rebound damping adjustment to do before the ride gets comfortable. A willing party, I know I’m here to stay. It’s amazing and comforting to start noticing or realizing that the number of couples there are actually out there in our shoes. But the energy to walk on didn’t root here. It’s the sincerity and the absolute genuine personality that broke my defence. Like floodgates, once you open it, it’s hard to close it back. Not like I have any intentions to.

Let’s work on it and see how tomorrow is like. I know it can only be better.