家后

I have never been emotionally close to my Mom since I was a kid. My grandma was my pillar of support and I'm quite obviously, a Daddy's girl. Recently, I begin to see so much of my Mom's flaws in myself and that isn't making my life any better. Realisation is only the beginning of a long journey ahead of me.

Throughout the years, especially during the bad times when Dad could barely support us (my hamper delivery experience would say alot but that's for another day), Mom never left the family. Having gone home one day to see them scream and shout at one another, makes me dread going home but that scene never quite appeared again. After that episode, they made the extra effort to not turn things ugly before the children's eyes. Only long after I grew up, I found out that the things that they argued about was even uglier. These belong to the past which I do not wanna dig out and launder.

My Dad is a traditional Chinese man and would want to do his best for his children which he rarely fail us. Even if it means he has to give us all he's got and left with nothing for himself, he would do just that. I have very great respect for this man who means the world to me and made me what I am today. Although I was forced to be independent, I'm still thankful every single day of my life that I was brought up that way.

Mom on the other hand was milder and more of the "educator" than "disciplinarian". By reasonable standards, considering that I was caned by Dad on a regular basis, I should be really close to my Mom and love her to bits, I still can't help but feel detached from her. In a way, I think I'm too defensive of my Dad. But in recent years, I can slowly see why she did certain things. That didn't made me love her more but made me see how much she loves my Dad. Even till today, my Mom is so emotionally attached to my Dad, you start to see the little sacrifices she made in her little life. We always say "Behind every successful man, there's a woman." In my parents' case, that sentence is a testimony.

Of all the bad things I picked up from my Mom, I also found myself to be really tolerant with things and issues around me over the past few years, with patience you can never imagine me to have. Hot temperament is one that I inherited from Dad and that never quite gone hand in hand with patience and tolerance. But circumstances does change someone and after observing my Mom, I doubt it came from the circumstances. I could see those traits in her that I see in myself. She can be a little short in her temperament and lacks tact in her words... Or am I describing myself? For almost 30 years, I know it hasn't been easy for them to walk together and I know had she wanted, she might already have abandoned us all too long ago. She hung on and insisted on holding onto the family because the last thing she wanted was to watch us grow up in a broken family.

I know she loves me just because she's Mom but I know, to my Dad, without her, life will never be the same again and he'll never find someone who will love him as much as my Mom did, does and will continue to do so until God calls for them.



有一日咱若老　找无人甲咱友孝　我会陪你
(有一天我们若是老了 找不到人来孝顺 我会陪着你)

坐惦椅寮　听你讲少年的时阵　你有外摮
(坐在长板凳 听你讲着年轻的时候 你有多厉害)

吃好吃丑无计较　怨天怨地嘛袂晓　你的手
(吃好吃歹无计较 怨天怨地嘛不会 你的手)

我会甲你牵条条　因为我是你的家后
(我会紧紧牵着不放 因为我是你的妻子)

阮将青春嫁置恁兜　阮对少年跟你跟甲老
(我将青春嫁给你家 我从年少跟你跟到老)

人情世事已经看透透　有啥人比你卡重要
(人情世事也已经看透了 还有谁比你还重要?)

阮的一生献乎恁兜　才知幸福是吵吵闹闹
(我的一生奉献给你家 才知道幸福是吵吵闹闹)

等待返去的时阵若到　我会让你先走
(等你回去的时候若到了 我会让你先走)

因为我会呒甘　放你为我目屎流
(因为我不忍心 看着你为我流眼泪)

有一日咱若老　有媳妇子儿友孝　你若无聊
(有一天我们若是老了 有媳妇儿子来孝顺 你若是无聊)

拿咱的相片　看卡早结婚的时阵　你外缘投
(拿我们的照片 看以前结婚的时候 你有多英俊)

穿好穿丑无计较　怪东怪西嘛袂晓
(穿好穿歹无计较 怪东怪西嘛不会)

你的心我会永远记条条　因为我是你的家后
(你的心我会永远的记住 因为我是你的妻子)

阮将青春嫁置恁兜　阮对少年就跟你跟甲老
(我将青春嫁给你家 我从年少就跟你跟到老)

人情世事嘛已经看透透　有啥人比你卡重要
(人情世事嘛已经看透了 还有谁会比你还重要?)

阮的一生献乎恁兜　才知幸福是吵吵闹闹
(我的一生奉献给你家 才知道幸福是吵吵闹闹)

等待返去的时阵若到　你着让我先走
(等你回去的时候若到了 我会让你先走)

因为我会呒甘　看你为我目屎流
(因为我舍不得 看着你为我流眼泪)